the_bell_jar
If neurotic is wanting two mutually exclusive things at one and the same time, then I'm neurotic as hell. I'll be flying back and forth between one mutually exclusive thing and another for the rest of my days.
Entries 389
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3/5/2004 in Victim of Society
wow its so fuking weird how fast your mood can change. i was having a pretty happy day up until we were sitting at pizza and stuff. i started to feel a knot form in my stomach and i guess the rea...
3/4/2004 in Victim of Society
My friend was freaking me out today. He was telling me about how he got SUPER high and that he is never going to do that again because you find out "the truth". And I was thinking to myself "What...
3/3/2004: Andrea in Victim of Society
One of my best friends Andrea is one of the coolest people I have ever met! A few years ago we hated eachother and then when highschool started we started to become friends. We both realized that...
3/2/2004: Josh's last days in La Verne in Victim of Society
Well this is Josh's last week at Bonita! He is moving to Ontario and going to some other highschool all because the people who used to live in his house want it back so they had to find a new hou...
2/21/04 in Victim of Society
Tonight was kinda weird. I was having a good time hanging out with Gil and then we went over to Justin's and Justin seemed like mad at me. So I asked him about it and he told me Margot told him I...
2/18/2004: Brother bear in Victim of Society
Recently, I've really grown to appreciate my 13-year-old brother Kyle. I mean, when I think about it, he's always been there for me like when I was little and couldn't go outside to play, he'd st...
2/18/2004: Daniel in Victim of Society
So there is this guy Daniel. Let's just say I was pretty much in love with him at one time. We went out and I broke up because I didn't see the relationship going anywhere. Then he changed dramat...
2/14/2004 in Victim of Society
Today was kinda a weird day at school. I wasn't feeling very social so at break I just walked around. In all my classes, when I had some free time I wrote in my journal and at the end of the day ...
Perhaps some day I'll crawl back home, beaten, defeated. in The Wanderer
“Perhaps some day I'll crawl back home, beaten, defeated. But not as long as I can make stories out of my heartbreak, beauty out of sorrow.” -SP Yeah, I am definitely crawling back home...but I...
I like people too much or not at all. in The Wanderer
“I like people too much or not at all. I've got to go down deep, to fall into people, to really know them.”--SP I suppose this is why I have such a hard time with people these days. Like postcar...
January 4th: Moving back to California in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
I am moving back to California. AHHHHH I can't believe it. I really didn't want to have it all come to this, but in the end I believe it is the best decision for both my present life and my futur...
December 25th in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
Well I still can't believe how different things are this year compared to last year. But I should be used to it by now? I haven't had consistency since I was a child! On Xmas eve Rodney and I wen...
November 6th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
Well I am here at my grandma's house in Laguna Woods. The weather is SO nice. I can't remember the last time I experienced good weather....And I am not looking forward to going back to 30 degrees...
October 27th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
So last week I find out that Dave has been talking to an ex....(I went on his FB and read the messages). Part of me was shocked and the other part of me relieved that now I didn't have to be the ...
October 21st, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
I’ve tried for a week to log in to OD…I am surprised it actually let me today. I want to perhaps switch to Prosebox, but I know it will not be the same. I am finally back on birth control and I ...
October 2nd, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
R and I have been hanging out a lot. The other night we went to some spot out in Wenham to chill. It felt like I was driving through Washington and it was so pretty! We parked the car and it was ...
September 26th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
Well I always knew this time would come, but I definitely was not thinking this soon. I am happy though. I feel a huge sense of relief. Dave and I are getting a divorce. Right now it is all just ...
September 19th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
The other night R texted me saying that he got out of work early. I was soooo happy and asked if he wanted to take a drive with me to pick up V at the airport. He said yes and he ended up driving...
September 17th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
School has been awesome! I absolutely love my poetry and literature class. I feel like I am entering a philisophical discussion each time I'm in class and I LOVE talking about life in that sense....
September 10th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
V is officially in France until mid September, which only meant one thing prior to her departure: one of V's infamous parties. I had a Saturday off so I was stoked! Grabbed some Blue Moon and ot...
September 4th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
the glass door, faces hidden by our own reflection opens gently the screen, can you hear me better now? opens calmly facing one another touching. slow jagged awkward movements. the sip of alcohol...
August 29th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
My YH quiz was yesterday and I guess I passed because they never called me and they said no call is good news! :) It is going to be so awesome NOT studying cheese, sauces, breads, etc. etc. etc....
August 20th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
I can't believe it has been a little over a week since I left the Fern. I feel like it has been so long. Work has been stressful...I am still in training until the end of this month. We basically...
August 14th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
Well a lot has been going on. I barely use my laptop so I never update like I should! But I got a new job at the Yard House and I had orientation yesterday. Basically it was just a bunch of corpo...
July 29th, 2013 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"
Dave and I have been talking about getting another dog and Ive been checking the shelter. I really wanted another Maltese but they are expensive and Dave wanted a different kind. We found Slater ...
