Redefine22
Entries 69
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Time Traveler in 2020
One of the biggest challenges that I face is keeping myself in the here and now. I find myself daily- several times a day actually- wandering into the past. It’s like when I was a child and had j...
I feel like I’m in the process of shedding a lot of extraneous brain flab that I’ve allowed to accumulate thru the years. The “swirl” as I call it- that has no apparent purpose other than to torm...
The crash I knew was coming hit in September, and now as 2020 begins I’m finally feeling like I’m beginning to resurface from the depths. Starting the new year with a new diagnosis and new medi...
I spent several hours this weekend organizing and shedding all unnecessary possessions and paperwork. It’s been awhile, and as always, it comes as a surprise how much extraneous SHIT one person ...
Row, Row, Row Your Boat in 2019
.....with the current rather than against it. It makes for a much less exhausting journey.
Either I break out of the logjam I’m in, or the malaise and inertia is going to do me in. I’m at the point where either I go forward, or I start sliding backwards. The winter thaw we’re experienc...
We’re in the heart of winter now- another storm coming in a few hours, followed by below-zero temps. This is when I go into survival mode. My days consist of outside clean-up at home, and then in...
Time for the next phase. I think I purged out the last of the bitterness and disappointment today. Sometimes you gotta wallow in it to get it out of your system. And then after the wallowing come...
Insurgency in 2019
It took awhile, but winter has definitely settled in- and I friggin’ HATE it. Now comes the battle I always wage with myself until Spring arrives. This isn’t the seasonal depression stuff I typi...
Footprints in 2019
The further along I am on this personal journey towards self- understanding, the more I can see the tracks I’ve left behind me as I’ve slowly emerged from the weeds. I see those muddy footprint...
Snow-Weary Ramble in 2019
Shoveled for more than 5 hrs today- snowblower wouldn’t stay running, so we had to do everything by hand. I’m definitely gonna be sore tomorrow. Current Temp is -1.3. Real feel is probably closer...
And So It Comes in 2019
After an early start in November, this year’s winter has been very mild so far. It’s been a nice change to keep crossing the weeks off the calendar without any significant snow or cold. That ends...
Eyes Forward in 2019
Perry is borrowing my car- and some money-tomorrow. Dropped the car off down there tonite. It’s unreal the situation he got himself in with Cat. I feel bad for him as far as the Parkinson’s goes...
My dreams have been interesting lately. In last night’s, I was a member of some army and up on a platform barefoot- some sort of scaffolding. Unpopped popcorn kernels began raining down on me, a...
Regular Joe in 2019
I’ve really underestimated how far taking healthy craps goes towards ones sense of well-being and a positive state of mind. Something as simple as that. I’ve been battling bathroom issues for a...
The older I get, the more interested I am in “Truth.” Obviously, we are living in an alternative-facts world politically these days- but Im talking more about “Truth” on a personal level. Who AM...
Paging Dr. Whitford in 2019
So, what do you think it means when you dream that your doctor is Bradley Whitford, and he is preparing you to lie in a coffin for 10 minutes so they can “measure you properly”? I’m usually pret...
Nolite Te Bastardes Carborundorum in 2019
Why have I never read The Handmaid’s Tale? I’ve been on a bit of a reading kick again lately- Warlight, There There, Between The World and Me, Underground Railroad- all fine, fine books and ver...
MIrror- Man in 2019
I’m getting better at winning the battle with myself. The man in the mirror is always my biggest adversary. My mirror-man insists on dwelling in negativity and wants nothing more than to talk me ...
Turning the Ship Around in 2019
Change is hard. The malaise runs deep inside me. It’s going to take a LOT to change my mental habits and outlook enough to make some positive improvements in my life. The ditch I’ve been in for ...
Vegetation in 2019
Today was a hibernate/recovery day- slept for almost 12 hrs and then did nothing but watch football. A necessary day though- I feel better tonite. I’m still gonna have this cold for awhile, but ...
One of the things I really need to work on in this New Year is patience with other people. The older I get, the less tolerance I have for ignorance and stupidity. It appears to me that basic comm...
Plugging Away in 2019
The New Year’s cold continues- I’m not quite as caught in the vise grips of sinus pressure that I was earlier in the day. I’m hoping a good night’s sleep gets me turning in the right direction wi...
Packed In Cotton in 2019
I hate head colds- it always feels like the rest of the world is reaching me on a not quite tuned in frequency. I feel like I’m packed in cotton and in a glass-encased enclosure. I’m interacting ...
Starting Again in 2019
I’m greeting the New Year with a cold- first serious cold I’ve had in about 3 years. I knew I’d get it- every time Shey gets sick, so do I. It’s been that way since she was a baby, and after spen...
