Entries 57

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Perry is borrowing my car- and some money-tomorrow. Dropped the car off down there tonite. It’s unreal the situation he got himself in with Cat. I feel bad for him as far as the Parkinson’s goes...

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My dreams have been interesting lately. In last night’s, I was a member of some army and up on a platform barefoot- some sort of scaffolding. Unpopped popcorn kernels began raining down on me, a...

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I’ve really underestimated how far taking healthy craps goes towards ones sense of well-being and a positive state of mind. Something as simple as that. I’ve been battling bathroom issues for a...

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The older I get, the more interested I am in “Truth.” Obviously, we are living in an alternative-facts world politically these days- but Im talking more about “Truth” on a personal level. Who AM...

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So, what do you think it means when you dream that your doctor is Bradley Whitford, and he is preparing you to lie in a coffin for 10 minutes so they can “measure you properly”? I’m usually pret...

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Why have I never read The Handmaid’s Tale? I’ve been on a bit of a reading kick again lately- Warlight, There There, Between The World and Me, Underground Railroad- all fine, fine books and ver...

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I’m getting better at winning the battle with myself. The man in the mirror is always my biggest adversary. My mirror-man insists on dwelling in negativity and wants nothing more than to talk me ...

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Change is hard. The malaise runs deep inside me. It’s going to take a LOT to change my mental habits and outlook enough to make some positive improvements in my life. The ditch I’ve been in for ...

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Today was a hibernate/recovery day- slept for almost 12 hrs and then did nothing but watch football. A necessary day though- I feel better tonite. I’m still gonna have this cold for awhile, but ...

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One of the things I really need to work on in this New Year is patience with other people. The older I get, the less tolerance I have for ignorance and stupidity. It appears to me that basic comm...

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The New Year’s cold continues- I’m not quite as caught in the vise grips of sinus pressure that I was earlier in the day. I’m hoping a good night’s sleep gets me turning in the right direction wi...

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I hate head colds- it always feels like the rest of the world is reaching me on a not quite tuned in frequency. I feel like I’m packed in cotton and in a glass-encased enclosure. I’m interacting ...

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I’m greeting the New Year with a cold- first serious cold I’ve had in about 3 years. I knew I’d get it- every time Shey gets sick, so do I. It’s been that way since she was a baby, and after spen...

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I’m anxiously awaiting tomorrow’s midterm elections with bated breath. I know the polls look good for a Democratic takeover of the House, but how wrong were the polls two years ago? God help us a...

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One of the joys of living here in the Mohawk Valley of upstate New York is the ever-present knowledge that my sinuses are alive and well. While taking a first-aid class long ago, my Red Cross ins...

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I’m a classic over-thinker. BIG TIME. I had a dream the other night I was playing poker and I had so many cards in my hands that it was impossible to make any rational decisions on how to play my...

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I just finished the book of that name by David Guterson, and it’s main theme is resonating with me. What is the more noble path in life- to accept the hypocrisy, compromise, and lies we all tell...

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Did life reject me or did I reject life? The blinding brilliance of the world is a mirror to the squalor that resides within my soul. How much longer can I live this cardboard cutout of a life ...

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I can feel myself starting to think more clearly with each passing day. The runaway emotions I sometimes fall prey to have seemed to subside for now, and I’m beginning to get back to thinking lo...

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I’ve been working on this issue for awhile now, and it was at the forefront of my session with Dr. Spencer today. I really got myself stuck in a distorted worldview when I was younger- a worldvi...

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Now that the summer weather has arrived and I’m getting outside and being more active, I’m REALLY feeling the 20 lbs I allowed myself to gain in the past year. I feel heavy and lethargic- like t...

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It is both scary and mind-boggling that we are living in a time where a professional sports league is forcing its players and personnel to stand for the national anthem. And even MORE scarier and...

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Gave a Power Red blood donation today, and by the end of work tonight I was really dragging. I’m O Neg- universal donor- so I try to give blood as much as I can. The minor annoyance of feeling f...

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Thanks to a comment by a fellow PB’er, and the gloriousness of a perfect May day, I bounced back from yesterday’s blah-ness and am in a pretty good frame of mind today. Got the two lawns mowed a...

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So many of my days are spent feeling ghost-like. Am I real? Is reality real? Am I really here? I feel like a visitor from some other plane of existence- an incorporeal wraith drifting thru the ma...

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