Park Row Fallout ⋅ 35

Midwest Married Man; Attempting to find answers, traverse the waters of life, and figure things out.

Each person feels pain in his own way, each has his own scars.

Haruki Murakami

Entries 1,752

Page 3 of 71

F.O. access entry will be released at some point today. I woke up with a big bump on my forehead and no idea how it got there. So… that’s interesting. But I also woke up with the puppy on the be...


June 27, 2019

I'm your in Trying to Hold On

Wanted to start today with a picture of my puppy. Here’s Nala in her sleep position dubbed Puppy Doughnut! I won’t do a detailed recap of last night. It’s all pretty much the standard marks. C...


Sometimes the stupidest thing can mean the most.


I know I have an issue with resentment in my marriage; that’s pretty obvious at this point. After all, my Wife is in many ways like a child despite being roughly 11 months away from turning 40. ...


I feel very off my game of late. I’m encouraged to chalk it up to the construction and that may be part of the reason. It is hard to feel “settled” or “in a groove” when 80% of the office is no...


EDIT MARKED AT BOTTOM I got my haircut and shaved my face. Images will be provided when available. In a lot of ways it is a… different experience. I feel lighter and younger… I hadn’t shaved my...


For the first official day of summer, it is uncharacteristically dark outside. Dark and rainy. More like a spring day. But then… that works, doesn’t it? As we fuck up the world, the world fin...


Honestly, title was selected for reasons beyond my comprehension. Though I often do that, and I like it. I sit down… look at the blank page… select a title based on whatever is going through my...


Back at work. 8:03 a.m. In the hallway? Red cling wrap covers the carpets to minimize dust and debris clean up. At each end of the hallway? A giant industrial emergency air conditioner. In ...


EDIT: I put the edit at the beginning just in case anyone has read this and just wanted to quick see what was added. After doing some independent research, my Dad has informed us that he thinks ...


Oh, dreams. “All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous m...


June 16, 2019

More Marital in Trying to Hold On

I don’t know if this is just venting or if perhaps my statements might be able to help others who experience similar concepts. Obviously, I would hope for the latter but ultimately… I don’t get ...


Sometimes, the hardest thing in the world is to accept that what you are going through is important. Maybe that’s just me? I read some truly terrible things in this job. A 7 year old child rou...


June 14, 2019

Trauma in Trying to Hold On

It is no surprise that once you’ve experienced something traumatic, it readjusts your expectations. If you experience the same trauma over a long enough period, that simply becomes your reality....


June 13, 2019

PS4 in Trying to Hold On

Friends: Back from conference. Will write more later. Looking forward to catching up, responding to notes, and getting work done. One thing I was excited about after the E3 presentations this yea...


(1) I am writing this from my phone and I bloody HATE typing on my phone! I mean, don’t get me wrong… I prefer receiving texts to phone calls… but typing? Whether autocorrect or my own fat thum...


June 10, 2019

Keanu in Trying to Hold On

Random thing I am sharing here because sharing it on Facebook would somehow make it “more of a controversy”. Element: Keanu Reeves recently has been on social media being applauded for photos whe...


Well… I was sick. Still am. Started this in the office on a Saturday trying to catch up with some work before heading to a work Conference on Sunday. See, the timing on it all sounds fishy but...


I did not go home this afternoon. I stayed at the office and did work. But I had my lights off and no tie on so… that’s kind of like going home, right? I am likely to pull out of here early. A...


Yesterday when I went home… I knew I was sick. It wasn’t just the heat. SO I stayed home and worked with the dog while Wife went to go workout. Some positives some negatives. Let me post the ...


After an incredibly busy day of work on Monday (seriously, I was in court from 8:30 a.m. to like 3:30 and then a full hour of paperwork!) I left work and went to Caseys. My car was THIRSTY! And...


It is a Monday, June 3rd… so this isn’t done on the 1st as I normally would prefer. Also, this is a Juvenile Court Monday and a Dog Training Monday… so I’m up to my eyeballs busy from about 8 a....


The human mind is a strange and dangerous thing. Yesterday morning, I had a dream where when I awoke? I felt better in general. As though my dream had given me an opportunity to repair somethi...


Alright y’all… between the Memorial Day Weekend and Work keeping me busy… this is kind of all being done at once. SO… I separated it out into various portions to hopefully make it easier to read...


Alright y’all… between the Memorial Day Weekend and Work keeping me busy… this is kind of all being done at once. SO… I separated it out into various portions to hopefully make it easier to read...