Xanatos

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June 12, 2017

Making history, making me in 2017

I have always lived my life, in quite conscious ways, as more than one person. I can remember, at the various summer day camps I went to, always creating a “club”, which these days overprotectiv...


June 12, 2017

May 25th to June 12th in 2017

Friday night, the cocktail party went very well. Leading up to it, Tomoko sent me messages informing me of the status of her search for alcohol. However, it was all pretty pointless as Inoue-sa...


May 24, 2017

May 23rd to 25th Eating in 2017

The night of May 23rd, I found myself starving. I was hungrier than I could remember having been in ages. More than that, I felt that odd compulsion to eat. I can’t even explain it. It was a ...


The 16th went well enough that there wasn’t really anything to report. The 17th went pretty well, but for a scheduling issue. I got to school, and found out that the schedule that I had receive...


The remainder of that week was rather dull. To be honest, things all kind of blended together and I don’t really remember a great deal of specifics. To give you an idea of how much it all blend...


Friday night was over shortly after the entry. I slept a lot and had nothing of interesting to report. Evidently I had another of those dreams where I dream in music. With full scores. It was...


Last night, I dreamed that I made my way down to Florida, and I kept lingering around Amanda and her place on a dirt bike, which I kept riding to various degrees of fancifulness. At one point, g...


It’s from a good song. Ignore the drama. I didn’t get as much accomplished as I had hoped. I fooled around too much after getting home rather than getting right to something. I’ve discovered t...


Since arriving, my days and my time have been spent similarly to how they were in the past. However, there are a few changes. So, let me describe what my days have been like for the last three ...


April 24, 2017

A Long Update in 2017

I’ll try to begin this entry as close to I can as the start of February. But, of course, I have to go back. In September, I injured my back. In trying to treat it, with onsen and electroshock,...


April 14, 2017

Bad Loans in 2017

I’ve once heard the art of self improvement being described as playing The Prisoner’s Dilemma by yourself over time. Best case scenario, present and future you do what you’re supposed to. Worst...


April 13, 2017

Hope in 2017

For nearly ten years, I’ve struggled with the aftermath of Rachael and Japan. For nearly ten years, I’ve struggled to pick up the pieces and move on, putting back together a broken philosophy an...


February 14, 2017

Going Home in 2017

Sunday, I go home for four weeks of medical treatment for my back. We’ll see how that goes.


January 15, 2017

Slipping in 2017

I’ve been diagnosed with a herniated disc. There is only one competent seeming chiropractor I can find in the country, and he is in Tokyo. Yesterday, he advised me that it wasn’t worth my time t...


January 11, 2017

Holding on in 2017

My vacation was wonderful. The time before it was miserable. The time after it has, thus far, not been encouraging. I need to keep reminding myself that I am Scott Adams’ “Moist Robot”. I need...


December 01, 2016

This Point in 2016

I suppose that one of the reasons that I don’t write about suicide as often as I think about it is a fear of becoming tiresome or being another cliche. I’m tired of remembering those high school...


November 29, 2016

A very frank admission in 2016

The youngest I remember actively considering suicide, I was thirteen. It’s been an ever present thought since then. Hovering, at all times, just off to the side of my peripheral vision. Even a...


November 29, 2016

No Way Out in 2016

I remember, in China, when I was reading through the Sherlock Holmes stories in my own little red cased Kindle. I remember the return of Sherlock Holmes and how the whole adventure was contrived...


November 16, 2016

For the first time in nine years in 2016

For the first time in nine years, for the first time I can remember, at least, the music turned off, and missed it.


I don’t remember if I got those classes that I wanted on the second. I also don’t remember anything about the third or 4th. Evidently I taught at an elementary school on the 3rd. Though, now t...


Yesterday, I had a very long and dull day at the BOE with nothing really worth talking about. At lunch, I popped into the barber’s. I was a bit embarrassed because I was there on their lunch, a...


I had two pleasant classes with Tateishi Sensei yesterday. I love teaching the first years. Unfortunately, due to Eikaiwa, I wasn’t able to teach the 6th period class. Eikaiwa was more than sl...


I had one class with Tateishi on the 27th. Beyond that, I rotted my eyes with a computer screen. I then went to the doctor, went to Kitchen Inoue, and went home. I watched a bit of Archer and ...


Nothing of interest happened on the 25th. As per expectation. I finished school (had no classes), then went to the doctor, then ate dinner, then vegged until I slept. Possibly there was grocer...


I was with Tateishis Sensei on Monday. I was supposed to have three classes, but, due to Eikaiwa, I could only do two. However, even these were shortened. They had more testing to do, so, I we...


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