Entries 34

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I had a weird nightmare last night that is stuck in my head. Most of my dreams are usually related to something that has happened to me that day. I think that I process a lot of emotions through ...

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I love working at a school but sometimes my coworkers/co-teachers drive me insane. My co-teacher decided to send out an email blast to the parents about what we did this week. This would have bee...

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I can’t believe that tomorrow is July 1st already! Time is passing at an interesting rate… It’s flying by but lasting forever at the same time. I remember the last 4th of July like it was yesterd...

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I had a bit of a mental break yesterday. The whole thing was triggered by PMS but it was still rooted in the truth of my inner feelings. I went to get ready for dance and remembered that the boot...

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It’s been a few months and thankfully I can say that I’ve done a lot of healing. Things got worse before they got better but they DID get better. I think him showing me his TRUE colors helped me ...

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My new anthem is “I will survive” by Gloria Gaynor. That song brings me so much strength. gotta love the power of music! As much strength as that song brings me I still feel like I’ve been broke...

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Jackson admitted everything to me yesterday. He took my money for fronting a drug deal, cheated on me, lied to me about his employment, and many other things. He told me he would pay me back on ...

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At this point, I have gone through all of the stages of grief about 5 times. I am no able to find humor in the absolute madness that has become my reality. Jackson is playing that he’s mad at me...

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I have felt physically sick and haven’t been able to eat very much since I found out that Jackson is not who he says he is… I may or may not have broken down in the office at planned parenthood y...

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Turns out Jackson has been cheating on me… or cheating with me. I looked through his phone after he fell asleep so that I could get his emergency contacts just in case something happened and I fo...

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“I love you”, do you? “You’re like no one I’ve ever been with”, am I? “I’ve never felt like this before”, have you? “It’s different with us”, is it? Same song new rendition. Men say they want a ...

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I’m a pleaser. I don’t know exactly why I’m such a people pleaser but I know that I am. Wanting to please the people in my life often gets in my way. I know I shouldn’t put so much energy into ot...

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Jackson and I have been inseparable for the last 20 days (but who’s counting) and I am scared I might lose myself in US. I don’t want to lose who I am in our relationship. I guess me changing is ...

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Jackson and I had our first bigger argument yesterday. Thank god we were able to work through it. We were at my parent’s house and he unexpectedly brought up that he has a son. We had agreed that...

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Do I want space or am I scared? I was feeling like I needed space yesterday but it might just be that I am scared. It’s not really HIM that I need space from but the energy in his home. I feel l...

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Last night Jackson and I went out dancing. The numerous women that he has a history with were there of course but hey, I have my men with history there too, who am I to judge? He didn’t point the...

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Today’s the day that Jackson and I go public in the dance community. I am excited to finally get to show off my relationship to all our dance friends. Last week we tried to hide it because we wer...

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Jackson and I were talking about how we feel brand new. Both of us have this clean slate to start with and we’re both very excited. I told him that I feel like I have been waiting for him to come...

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I have fallen and I don’t wanna get up. I am fully obsessed with Jackson and I have no doubt that I am in love with him. We have seen each other almost every day for the past 7 days. You would th...

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I told my mom about Jackson and she took it shockingly well… like weirdly well… I think I have Kevin to thank for her supportiveness, ironically. My mom wasn’t the biggest Kevin fan mostly becaus...

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You guys, I’m screwed. I really fucking like this guy. I wasn’t ready to feel so strongly about anyone, especially this quickly. I decided to take a small leap of faith with Jackson. He has some...

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How are you supposed to respond to someone confessing their undying love for you out of the blue? Asking for a friend… Soooooooooooo. This weekend was interesting, to say the least. A couple of w...

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I often feel that my mom downplays everything in my life. Do I slack-off sometimes? yeah, but so does everyone. I feel like I am not allowed to have horrible feelings. I don’t know if it qualifie...

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It’s that time of the month! When I start feeling like an absolute crazy person! Hormones! Gotta love em! I hate being this emotionally fragile. I am having a rough morning… Definitely first worl...

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I had one of those “5 years ago today” posts pop up on my Instagram yesterday of a picture of me with my best friend from college. It made me sad to see such a happy memory of a person I’m no lon...

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