Entries 157

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I dunno if that’s accurate, but that’s sure how it feels. I finally have the truck I’ve always wanted. I haven’t driven it in over a month. I like my car. I barely drive it. I want to get the gar...

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So M and I have been talking for over a week now, relatively consistently. It’s been on me to start the conversation. I don’t like that. The other side of it is emotionally, I want her to come ba...

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The pets and I have been very inactive this weekend. The dog is curled in a ball passed out, and the cat is on his back with this sort of smirk as he sleeps. I’m barely keeping my eyes open. I’v...

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GOD DAMN IT FUCKING SHIT! I should never have replied to M! I sent the message first yesterday, conversation ran till we both went to bed. I didn’t message today, and nothing. So what was the fuc...

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M (aka “The Vanishing Act”) up and messaged me out of nowhere last night. No one would be more shocked than I am. I’ve not exactly cut her any slack. I’ve been blunt almost to the point of being ...

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I’ve managed to do the grocery shopping. I have yet to do the laundry. I’m trying not to think at all, or at least as little as possible. It’s 7:45 in the evening. I already don’t want to go to...

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Sorry. It’s been an odd week, and I’ve had a very difficult time getting out of my head. I’ll be so fucking glad when I get back on my medication. This depression is driving me up the damn wall. ...

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I didn’t, but I almost did. I was coming back from running errands in the truck, and while I was on the street, a girl walked past my drive while I was still on the street waiting on the gate to ...

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Dad’s been on my mind today. Not sure exactly what set it off, but yeah. I’m wishing I’d written down some of his stories, or better yet, recorded him telling some of them. Not like I didn’t have...

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Well, I didn’t kill anyone, the work truck is still parked under my carport, and I didn’t smoke. I also didn’t sleep well last night. I dunno what happened. I didn’t really dream that I can reca...

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Am I the only one who waits till the last minute to do chores? I’ve had a three day weekend, thanks to it being New Year’s and all. I spent 2-1/2 days with my ass plastered to the couch surrounde...

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Got a rather rude phone call from boss’s dad as I didn’t have the work truck available Saturday for him to gas up. (Not like I have an issue dealing with refueling it myself.) Basically, after I ...

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Sometimes I seriously hate being emotionally enabled. Today has been absolutely crap. Everything is setting my emotions off. Happy scenario or thought, sad scenario or thought, and I can feel my ...

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For the longest time (over 2 years) I was haunted by this girl I just referred to as “The Ginger”. I know a lot about her, but that’s for another story. Now, I have a new one. Jessica. She’s a sc...

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A friend of mine moved back to the area from Idaho, and got in touch with me today. She came by the store, and I walked over when she got out of her car. Her first order of business was to give m...

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It's frigid here. Below freezing. So cold in fact that my fountain/pond thing is frozen over, and I had a rude surprise when I went to knock what I thought was water off the tarp over the dog ken...

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I'd have gotten to this sooner, but while I was at the Russian place enjoying some piroshki and Scottish breakfast tea, S sent a text and said she wanted to meet up, so I gave her directions and ...

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To preface this, I do believe that dreams tell us things. Sometimes, though, I'll admit I have no clue what my dreams are trying to tell me, and other times I do. Last night, I dreamed that a g...

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I'm realising I'm getting very down at night. I'm usually fine during the day, but at night, I don't want to be bothered by anyone. The neighbor boy means well, and I know he's just trying to get...

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So after spending $65 to fill up the SUV last night, I went back to driving the car. The smaller gas tank is easier on the wallet, and the smaller engine means I go through the smaller tank less ...

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Not sure if I used this book or the other one, but I wanna say thanks to everyone who commented on "The Good Ex". I'm going to nut up and just send her a friend request on Facebook. It's been ove...

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I had a dream two nights ago that I was getting back together with my first girlfriend. She's the only one I can honestly say that I have no complaints about her, and wish she'd been the one to l...

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So Monday I fouled my back up again after staging my deliveries in the dock, and after speaking to the manager, I went straight to the urgent care clinic up the street. I've got a "thorasic sprai...

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I don't know how much more of this I can take. Work is just breaking me down physically. The stress of issues with other people, managers, the hours, and the loads, it's playing hell on my head. ...

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So I would have been posting sooner, but this week has been complete shit. Sunday was actually done with quickly. Monday, our first delivery was to a manufactured home (mobile home) with a full...

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