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Dumpster Diving At The Mental Health Clinic
It’s one thing to be in a waiting room at a regular doctor’s office. You should see the lobby at a state ran mental health facility.
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I feel like shit. Acid on my stomach is bringing bile to my throat and liquid fire out my butt. Today I shall lay low with antacids, Peptol and plenty of water. It’s almost 8 AM and I’m thinki...
What's Sleep?
Monday was my birthday and it was so hard. At dinner that night an elderly couple sat at a table across from me. I listened as the man told his wife, “to another forty-one years,” as they clink...
Quote From Harlem Shuffle
“The way he saw it, living taught you that you didn’t have to live the way you’d been taught to live. You came from one place but more important was where you decided to go “ -Colson Whitehead
Today I Am 41
Looming on the horizon, as the day approached I became more and more depressed. Now that it is here I just don’t care it’s my birthday. Big woo, I’ll go eat at an overpriced steakhouse. I wish...
Sugah!
3:15 AM Still getting insane sugar cravings late at night. I’m ashamed at just how many sweets I ate the other night. Again, did my drinking at night so the sugar fairy comes at night. Today I ...
It's 8:16 AM, Will You Wake Up Please?
Actually it’s 1:48 AM. I just have 311 stuck in my head. I slept well and woke up with my back feeling better. Yet my left elbow started hurting yesterday, too. It hurts worse now and the br...
If I'm Not Back In Ten Minutes
Just wait longer… I pulled a muscle in my back that makes it hurt to breathe. Screw this noise. Still having gut issues after I eat. Dunno what’s going on. Rosie Butt is doing great! She was...
More Stomach Issues (Rose Update)
I have felt queasy all day. Like there is something nasty on spin cycle in my gut. I’ve taken Pepto and have drank a lot of water. I feel somewhat better but not fully. And Rosie was flopped o...
My Tummy Aches
12:24 AM Had to get up and take mom to work again. Except this time I crashed shortly after getting home and slept on and off till 1 . I wanted to get out of the house and do something but the ...
Prosebox Has Seizures On My Mobile
It’s hard to explain. Like the logo and front page top line will multiply itself down the front of my screen and I can’t see anything else unless I turn my phone sideways to landscape. It’s weir...
Vet
Finally got Rose out from under the bed for her vet check up. X-ray shows she’s doing well so the doc instructed us to finish out the meds we have and see how she is next week. Right now I’m s...
Melissa Joan Hawt (Rose Update)
I’ve been watching reruns of Sabrina The Teenage Witch. I remember the days of Clarissa Explains It All. My childhood crush. We were supposed to take Rose to the vet for a checkup on Monday but...
Interlude (Rose Update, Too)
(100 Days Sober) Am I not good enough? Am I not what you want? Well take this fuckin’ gun And blow my head off Cancerslug - The Beyond I had a dream about someone the other day and since then my ...
I'VE GOT THE BULLETS! (And A Rose Update)
Normally I don’t watch Turner Classic Movies except on very rare occasions. I like classic films, don’t get me wrong, just not high on the priority list. Well, I got to see Rebel Without A Caus...
It's Been A Day
My Maine Coon cat Rose has had a slight limp in her left front leg. Last night I noticed she couldn’t stand on it at all. At the vet they did some tests on her. Neurological issues. Her pupil...
The Methuselah Enzyme by Fred Mustard Stewart
This book was AWESOME! A doctor discovers not only the way to stop aging, but to reverse it. But at what cost? Okay, end of the month book count. Laura Resnick novels 5 Unsympathetic Magic Vampa...
Another Roadside Attraction by Tom Robbins
This is by far the weirdest book I’ve ever read. However this excerpt rings so true. The fact is, what I hated in the church was what I hated in society. Namely, authoritarians. Power freaks....
Take Twelve Of These And Call The Coroner In The Morning
When I finally fell asleep I crashed hard. Got up around ten and mom made breakfast as she took the day off. We both fell back asleep and I went into a nice, deep slumber. Next thing I know I ...
Pikachu! I Blame You!
The usual nurse didn’t administer my shot. It was an older lady and for some reason it’s hurting more than usual. I’m blaming her. I’ve felt awful since yesterday (Friday.) Nausea, aching joint...
Cat Dreams
Last night got better, sorta. Thanks to all who noted The drink craving passed but my body ached in certain spots. Spent the rest of the night with the heating pad, PlayStation and cats. At ...
Ow My Ass!
Actually my hip. Injection area, yeah yeah. I FINALLY found a pack of Al Capone’s at Walgreens. Hm, they’ll sell you meds to make you better and yet sell tobacco… Today I’m cleaning. Ugh. On t...
Alvin, Simon, Theodore!
Do Do Do do do do Do do Do do do do I’ve had that freakin’ theme song stuck in my head for over an hour now. Today I had my monthly shot. Surprisingly the injection site isn’t hurting. Yet. Speak...
STOP ITCHING GOD DAMNIT!!!
I’m going to switch laundry detergents. That’s the last thing I can think of that makes me itch so much. Today I had my exit interview with the outpatient counselor Bene. Got my certificate t...
I Want You To Play With My Ding-A-Ling
Yup, been up over 24 hours again. Insomnia sucks. Phone says it’s 18F out. I really wanted to drink the loneliness away last night. After I wrote yesterday’s entry I got lost in thought, yet aga...
Book Description
I came on my own volition.
I am the man that got away.
Work -
Tonight I clocked in at 4:30 PM and it was suddenly Wednesday when I worked 6:45 AM to 6 PM with only an hour lunch break and on my feet the rest. I was trying to relieve Logan in the back who was frying chicken both for our loose case and boxed hot case so he could go to lunch. Instead I got mixed with a redneck who wanted a Philly steak and cheese. I made his sandwich to order only to be confronted with the elderly gentleman behind him. He, to this shit. o, wanted a Philly. I was annoyed. Angry. Granted chicken side cooking sucks At least you’re away from the customers. I can, “pretend”, like I’m cooking chicken in the back but dick around for ten minutes, which actually rarely happens. You learn to smile and accept this shit. Made him his sandwich, didn’t stop to ask the next customer if he needed help. Instead, went straight to the back and told Logan to take his lunch, I was taking over, box up what just came up out the fryer and we’re good.
It was just one of those days. People wonder why I get stoned before work.
I.
Am.
Robot.
Tell.
Me.
What.
Is.
Next.
I’m versatile.
Put me in any situation and I come victorious.
Even on the bad days.
So when I go the hardcore bitch mode of my assistant manager on Wednesday after my eleventh hour there. I got irate.
I know she does a job for two.
Her boss/my boss sucks ass.
But fuck....I’m part time.
If you want to bitch and yell about the shit that the full timers didn’t do…bitch to them.
DON’T MAKE ME DO THEIR FUCKING SHIT THE LAST HOUR I’M THERE!
I’ve been working for this slave camp for three and a half years.
I lost my insurance last year due to me being stupid and the store manager catching on. Which is actually a big blessing. I haven’t missed a day in a year.
But I’ve been there for every shift.
Sleep, no sleep?
Fuck it.
Show up for work.
The computer takes over on schedule and now I don’t qualify for our good insurance.
I have to take the government stuff?
OK.
I’m a democrat.
Lifelong.
BUT FUCK YOU OBAMA!
Don’t tell me what to do.
I’ll go another year without health insurance.
I want my good Blue Cross Blue Shield Back.
Make my job give me the hours back for insurance.
People close to me say I need to see a therapist.
After A.A. and an almost check in at rehab.
Maybe I do need anti-depressants.
This is a rant with no one I know reading this.
Its liberating.
I welcome ProseBox into my life.
