🌈 JustWillow 🦄 ⋅ 43

Well-behaved women seldom make history…

Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Entries 179

Page 5 of 8

September 10, 2019

Mindfulness. in Mental Health

So, what feels like a really horrible thing happened today, a thing I’m not sure can be repaired. But some really important things are happening now, since the thing that feels like the worst thi...


September 03, 2019

Once Upon a Time... in Phoenix

I had this therapist, this tiny little hobbit of a woman who reminded me of Dr. Ruth without the accent. I think I was around 26 or 27 years old at that time, so a good 15 years ago. I was not in...


September 01, 2019

Pain. in Phoenix

Had a really hard day at work today. Almost 11 hours. I am not cut out for that and I don’t know how to make my chef understand. I mean, I guess there’s no way to make him understand. The man doe...


August 31, 2019

Evolution. in Phoenix

Evolution is a painfully slow process, both in nature, and in me. I am very hesitant to change. I do a thing a way and that’s just the way I do that thing. Until I start to change the way I do th...


August 21, 2019

I am not okay. in Phoenix

Have to drive several hundred miles tomorrow to take my son to college. My baby is leaving. I’ve been fine, mostly, until today. Today, I can’t stop crying. I can’t stop trying to imagine what it...


August 20, 2019

Being Bi-Polar... in Mental Health

…is no fun. I hurt myself repeatedly. Not physically, but mentally and emotionally. I jerk myself around. I feel one thing one day and the opposite the next. I have random thoughts that cut like...


August 07, 2019

You. in Phoenix

I’ve discovered something that feels pretty amazing (and kinda creepy). It’s what I’m going to think of as a new form of self care. Just scrolling through our… pic-chat? Just looking at all the p...


July 28, 2019

Acceptance. in Phoenix

This is a thing that I’m learning a lot about, both how to accept things and how to feel accepted. I’ve never had trouble accepting some things, especially if they were things that made me feel a...


July 20, 2019

The Shiny Wears Off in Phoenix

Random thought that popped into my head just a few minutes ago. He called me adorable. I get all weird with compliments. I don’t know how to react to them. I get all shy and weird and try to curl...


July 13, 2019

Holding Back. in Phoenix

Over the years I was with the douchetastic Wanker, I developed a habit I can’t stop thinking about lately, a habit I’m wondering if I should, and even if I could, break. He wasn’t a “tactile per...


July 12, 2019

By. The. Balls. in Phoenix

I am feeling so ready to just grab life by the balls.


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July 01, 2019

Gratitude. in Phoenix

Have I written about gratitude before? I don’t know. But I’m going to right now because it’s what is on my mind. Feeling and expressing gratitude is incredibly important to me. It keeps me away f...


July 01, 2019

Hard Day. in Phoenix

This was a hard day at work, but it’s a hard day in another, more profound way. In a somewhat unexpected way. These are the days that are going to be the hardest for me. Hard day at work and all ...


June 22, 2019

Bulletproof. in Phoenix

Your love feels like armor. Aw jeez, I’m feeling cheesy. You make me feel all cheesy. All the happy chemicals are flowing through my brain, seemingly 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Nothing can t...


June 21, 2019

Who I Am. in Phoenix

Maybe I’m an enabler. Maybe I don’t know how to be unkind, even to people who don’t deserve my kindness. Maybe I don’t know how to be without compassion and empathy, even for people who don’t des...


June 21, 2019

Empowered. in Phoenix

Find a person who makes you feel empowered. Invincible. Undoubtedly loved, admired, and respected. Desired is pretty fucking nice, too. Find a person that, no matter how hard you look at them, yo...


June 21, 2019

Dear You, in Phoenix

I owe you an apology. I said I wouldn’t take sides and yet, somehow, I found myself taking a side. It was the wrong side to take. He’s an abuser, girl. Make this time the last time you dump his a...


June 18, 2019

Dear You, in Phoenix

You came into my life when I needed a friend something fierce. You invited me into your circle, into your life, and suddenly I had so many new friends and I finally felt like I was in a place I f...


June 17, 2019

ADHD Mania. in Phoenix

That’s what I got going on! I can definitely feel the mania ramping up and my ADHD is in overdrive. I can’t focus on anything for more than a few minutes or even seconds. My brain is on fire. L...


June 17, 2019

Dysfunctional. in Phoenix

I wasn’t raised in a dysfunctional family in the traditional sense of dysfunctional, I think. But I was definitely dysfunctional and so were most of my family members individually. My family was ...


June 16, 2019

She is me. in Phoenix

There have always been things I was interested in, things I wanted to try, see, do. I’ve also always restrained myself in so many ways for so many reasons, the biggest two being low self-esteem a...


June 15, 2019

Love Hard. in Phoenix

I don’t know how to love a little. I love hard, with all that I am. Yeah, that’s not a good thing, folks. At least, it hasn’t been. I’ve had a real bad habit of throwing myself into another perso...


June 12, 2019

Abused. in Phoenix

Reading this today on Facebook stunned me speechless for a moment. This is how I’ve lived my entire adult life, accepting abuse with love because that’s all I’ve ever known. I think my mind has ...


June 12, 2019

Rage. in Phoenix

It’s what’s for dinner. I’ve had a few random bursts of almost uncontrollable rage today. That hasn’t happened in a very long time, many months. Maybe even years. It’s been a long time since I’ve...


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