🌈 JustWillow 🦄 ⋅ 43

Well-behaved women seldom make history…

Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Entries 180

Page 6 of 8

June 11, 2019

Rage. in Phoenix

It’s what’s for dinner. I’ve had a few random bursts of almost uncontrollable rage today. That hasn’t happened in a very long time, many months. Maybe even years. It’s been a long time since I’ve...

He says that a lot. “We’ll figure things out in a way that makes sense.” And, you know, we will. Everything about us makes sense, so why wouldn’t we be able to figure things out in a way that als...

He baked me banana bread, ya’ll. A man. Baked. Banana bread. For me. Take note, boys. Bitches love banana bread. And not just any old banana bread, no sir. Special fancy banana bread baked with ...

June 09, 2019

Polyamory in Phoenix

I saw a comment on a Facebook post that said something like, “I’m not straight but my partner is.” That hit me right in the feels because that has been every relationship I’ve ever been in. I’m b...

June 06, 2019

420 in Phoenix

I drove away from you that day thinking I’d probably never see you again. I didn’t want to be thinking that, but I was. There was this idea in my head that said, “What an amazing, fairy-tale, dre...

June 06, 2019

Four Years Ago. in Phoenix

If I don’t stand up for myself, I’m weak, a doormat. If I do speak up, I’m being a bitch. If I keep quiet about my feelings, I’m bottling them up. If I let them out, if I’m honest with someone ab...

June 03, 2019

Deprivation. in Phoenix

I spent the majority of my childhood feeling deprived of affection. My family was just not very expressive about emotion, either verbally or physically. I just don’t really remember a lot of hugs...

June 03, 2019

Men Are Garbage. in Phoenix

Yeah, yeah, I know, #NotAllMen. Just fucking save it, eh? I was giving a friend a ride home tonight (technically last night… I haven’t slept yet.) and I said damn, we should have stopped for an a...

June 03, 2019

Life Partner. in Phoenix

I have had 2 men in my adult life that I genuinely believed, for a good period of time, would be in my life forever, as my husband, my friend, my lover, my co-parent, my life partner. Sperm Dono...

May 31, 2019

Partner. in Phoenix

That’s all I’ve ever really wanted, you know? That one person I could always count on to have my back when I really needed them. Someone to learn and grow with, and grow old with. I just don’t t...

May 30, 2019

#MeToo in Phoenix

I haven’t really participated in this whole #metoo thing. I mean, I’ve… well, I read a lot… but I never told my story. I couldn’t. No way could I Tweet it or Facebook it or… I mean, I talked abou...

May 28, 2019

Reservations. in Phoenix

I was going to call this entry “Fears” but that didn’t seem quite right. I don’t believe that it’s fear that I’m feeling, exactly. I think I’m just having reservations. Uncertainties. Yes, uncert...

May 27, 2019

Letting Go. in Phoenix

Been working really hard lately to purge a lot of noise from my life. People that aren’t good for me, my own rotten thoughts, clothes I don’t wear, and as much of #2’s shit as possible. I’ve nev...

May 26, 2019

Chains in Phoenix

An entire life lived in chains and you’re breaking them all.

May 25, 2019

like the sun in Phoenix

your mind is a library of knowledge your body, a garden of wonder your heart is a vault of magic your soul, a sea of wisdom nothing i do not love about you not even Chicago because you are it and...

May 23, 2019

Puzzle in Phoenix

We’ve both said, “You’re my missing piece.” You aren’t my missing piece. We are made up of all the most beautiful parts of ourselves, intertwined and intermingled. All of our pieces come togethe...

May 22, 2019

Emotional Maturity in Phoenix

I ain’t got none. I’m pretty sure I’m like… emotionally stunted. Or emotionally immature. In a weird way, I guess, considering how self-aware I am. My recent heightened level of self-awareness ha...

May 20, 2019

Boundaries! in Phoenix

I am doing so good! I went out tonight (Sunday) to one of the local watering holes, got white girl wasted, had a complete blast hanging out with a new friend I don’t see nearly enough and a frien...

May 20, 2019

Cognitive Dissonance. in Phoenix

“Cognitive Dissonance, the mental conflict that occurs when beliefs or assumptions are contradicted by new information. The unease or tension that the conflict arouses in people is relieved by on...

May 19, 2019

Old Habits. in Phoenix

I knew it couldn’t hold, my good mood, the elation I was feeling at how well my life is going. All the too-good-to-be-true-ness is holding, at least. There is so much in my life, so many good thi...

May 18, 2019

Without Shame. in Phoenix

I know I’ve written about shame before, but it’s a really prominent thought in my mind right now. I don’t know how to love without shame. I think. I mean, I don’t know how not to doubt myself, t...

May 18, 2019

Unsaid. in Phoenix

There are so many things I want to say but I don’t say them because I’ve been trained to believe that it should be embarrassing to be so expressive. It’s melodramatic. Cheesy. Annoying. I know ...

May 18, 2019

Unchained. in Phoenix

I have lived my entire life in mental and emotional chains. Some self-imposed and others not so much. As a child, I began to believe some pretty negative things about myself. I’ve spent my entire...

May 13, 2019

Too Good. in Phoenix

If life has taught me anything, it’s that if it seems too good to be true, it probably is. Okay, it always is. But shouldn’t there come a time in a person’s life where maybe they find something ...

May 11, 2019

Toddler. in Phoenix

I’m afraid of behaving like an annoying child, tugging a sleeve or a pant leg and chanting, “Mommy. Mom. Mom. Mom. Mommy? Mommmmmmy!” Is it because I was treated like an annoying child for years...

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