I’ve discovered something that feels pretty amazing (and kinda creepy). It’s what I’m going to think of as a new form of self care. Just scrolling through our… pic-chat? Just looking at all the pictures of you and the little videos and this song popped in my head.
Because, as I’m scrolling through all the pictures and things, I become… well. Joyful. Blissfully happy. Downright giddy. There are the little videos where you say you love me and all the wonderful faces of you in all of the places and I just… drink you in. Bathe myself in you. Think of all the compilations I could make. A “good morning” slideshow. A grocery store slide show! A butt slide show (bwahaha)! It’s a bit like watching a wonderful movie about two people madly in love. But looking at just your pictures and videos, just passing my own by and only paying attention to you, well… that’s like watching a wonderful movie about a man madly in love with a woman. I can see it and it’s beautiful. The most incredible, unbelievable thing I’ve ever seen.
And I start to feel whole again. A little less sad and a little less lonely. Because I know that the love that I’m seeing is for me. Me. Astounding.
And then, after that song up there was finished, this song followed it and I had never heard it before. I found it appropriate.
Anyway… yeah. You are so incredibly good for me in so many ways that having you in my life and the way we share our lives with each other is like the greatest form of self care ever. The only things that make it an even more effective method is hearing your voice on the phone or vidchatting with you or actually being in your presence. Just looking through the images of our relationship is enough for a massive mental well-being boost. I can feel my whole self just… light up.