AwaitingCrescendo

Just last month I was staying awake at night thinking about how one day I was going to die. Now I’m staying awake at night worrying that this is the only way I’m ever going to live.

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Entries 22

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October 26, 2018

One Day in Uncategorized Thoughts

I feel like, if weeks were only 3-4 days long I would be much better at them. I tend to start weeks really well. On the ball, at least mostly. I’m working out, I’m walking, I’m doing the chores...


My most consistent habit is making my bed in the morning. I started when I got my first cat, about six years ago, and it feels super weird when I come back in my room after getting breakfast and ...


August 21, 2018

Small Days in Uncategorized Thoughts

As I get older, I can’t decide if my goals are getting more specific, or if they’re just getting smaller. Maybe it was just that I had such big dreams when I was a younger thing, sure that I wou...


March 12, 2018

Sleeeeep in Uncategorized Thoughts

Sometimes, the right idea is just to go to bed -.- Both so that your bad mood doesn’t leak out onto other people, and because hey, tomorrow might be better. Yeah, it’s just the human equivalent ...


March 01, 2018

Mountains in Uncategorized Thoughts

The beginning of this year has been…difficult, and frustrating, and so much more. It’s not that I’ve been totally unfocused, because I haven’t been, but there has been a lot going on and I’ve ac...


March 09, 2015

Guarded. in Uncategorized Thoughts

I had an entry planned out, written at least thrice in my head, about how I’m approaching 30. What it means to me, what it doesn’t, what my failures are and what I’ll be focusing on. But this pl...


February 02, 2015

Gin and Dreams in Steps to Change

I was up too late last night. Currently, regret tastes of gin, and while I’d like to be able to tell you that good things happened, or that everything went to hell, the truth is to the left of i...


August 24, 2014

El Futuro Uno in Steps to Change

Nerd Fitness (which is rather awesome, overall - worth checking out, in my opinion) did an entry recently on time traveling. No, not about how it will soon be possible (spoiler alert: it won't b...


August 16, 2014

Scant Words in Uncategorized Thoughts

I keep meaning to write here. I have themes for entries, things I want to talk about, thoughts that I want to share. Then I get distracted, the moment passes, and...nothing. I've pretty much dec...


I'm listening to Chris Pureka and wondering when exactly I lost all my free time. It must have been months ago. I go through phases here, I think (here meaning this site, or ones like it). Som...


May 10, 2014

Status Update in Steps to Change

I have...stalled in my push to get into shape, due to a couple of factors, and I'm a little unsure how to proceed with this (though, considering how much I am unsure of right now, in general, thi...


My struggle to lose weight and get in shape continues (those two should probably be reversed, but one is more on my mind than the other). Really, that's about the only summing up that I can do. ...


April 20, 2014

Re-railing in Steps to Change

In the past week I've broken just about every good habit that I had been building, except for writing, and that one holds on by a technicality more than an actual fact. Eating well, exercise, sl...


April 15, 2014

Wasting in Uncategorized Thoughts

For how much we claim to love life, for how much we think about death, and for how many of those cliche expressions and quick sayings I see splattered about the internet, we sure do love wasting ...


March 10, 2014

30 Before 30 in Steps to Change

I started this chapter of this diary when I was trying to get into shape. It was going well for a while, a little over two months...and then a vacation made it kind of fall apart >_<. Com...


It's been a weird week for me. It's both flown by and dragged by at the same time. It's not even Friday yet and this week feels about a month long, and yet I've not really done anything. I kno...


February 09, 2014

Second Step Done in Steps to Change

As of yesterday, I am done with the second set of my three-week focus periods. I'm grouping those into bunches of three as well, which means that this is my final push on my first theme. To rem...


January 26, 2014

Signs of Progress in Steps to Change

It's been about a month that I have been at this trying to get into shape thing, and I have just gotten a good sign that I am actually making progress. In some of the other times that I have tri...


January 19, 2014

Recap One in Steps to Change

First three weeks down and I'm not entirely sure what I'm even supposed to feel about it. I (basically) met my goal, to work out three times a week, minimum. Last week I fell one time short, bu...


December 22, 2013

The Start of a Plan in Steps to Change

As I at least implied in my last entry, the hardest thing about me wanting to get in shape is that I have never really been in shape before. I don't know what to expect, how hard I can and can't...


Picture not related to this entry, and from asofteworld.com (it is not mine). The hardest thing about this reinvention of myself, about this getting in shape, is knowing when it's okay to forg...


So, who that was at my old place is actually here? I can't decide if I want to be here or elsewhere. The people make the difference.


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