Sister ⋅

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2 days ago

Those Quiet Moments in Him

There are times when I cease all things. I want to quiet my mind only to have them filled with thoughts of you… I affirm that I’m over you without it ever being true I close my eyes and look into...


Not really therapy, just realization. And I ramble. Forgive me. I need real therapy. I was thinking about how much I want to love someone and be in love. Sex and love are different, but they are ...


5 days ago

Meh... in meh...

So… It’s the quiet season at work. This means that if I have anything I’m interested in I had better deal with it now while I got “down time” at the office. I forgot to bring my bible in from lun...


January 18, 2020

It's Only Getting Worse in Him

This is escalation and it shouldn’t be happening. Perhaps we need to do this, get this out of our system and move on. Or maybe this will open up a floodgate. I’ve been craving kissing Him. To be ...


January 03, 2020

2 out of 3 in Him

1) RJ and I went to get drinks and snacks after work. We caught up and talked and got to the meat of the matter later on in our favorite setting: somewhere where live music is playing. At any rat...


December 31, 2019

3 Things That Happened in meh...

1) I wrote Him a detailed email and heart spilled on him. 2) I’ve been talking to RJ today. I apologized to her, but we’ve seemingly only scratched the surface. 3) “Friend” M. I wrote her a brief...


December 28, 2019

Today's Date, pt. 2 in meh...

On my way to church Christmas morning, I had a real moment with myself that started with my first love/lover at 14, Harry. Our relationship was mostly over the phone. We saw each other in person ...


December 28, 2019

Today's Date in meh...

So…I am here, at 1:31 in the afternoon still in the bed. I had plans to be up early, cleaning house, washing clothes, but instead, I have on a tshirt, but nekkid underneath, listening to what sou...


December 24, 2019

Fell In Again in Him

Not totally, but it’s there. He seems good. He seems happy in his life, so why are YOU here? But he keeps in touch. I stay away from his socials because I don’t want to really know. Give me the s...


November 01, 2019

I'm Okay in meh...

I’m in the midst of a Kirk Franklin fest on Spotify right now. I think I needed to become very acquainted with him today for some reason. He’s alright. 20 years ago, I would have been saying some...


October 31, 2019

Yesterday Came and Went in meh...

Yesterday was the 3rd anniversary of my sister passing away. It’s weird. For some reason it seems so much longer than 3 years. I was talking to my niece yesterday and told her that I feel like c...


October 23, 2019

You and Me in Him

This dance we stay away from. Opening books, peeking at phrases from who we were. We smile. We talk on the subject of you and me. I back out of it clumsily, but you keep advancing. Step to only ...


October 21, 2019

Stuff and Things in meh...

1) Him called me not long ago and said he wanted to hear my voice and wanted me to be sarcastic to him like only I do. I wasn’t in the mood to entertain him in that way. So, I did the next best t...


October 04, 2019

I Quit in meh...

I had a feeling that my check was going to be screwed up some kind of way. My check is short. My daughter is, once again, back at my house. All I ask is that she and the kids keep a low profile. ...


September 19, 2019

Predictable in meh...

It never fails. Once things get back on unsteady rails, the behavior resets and it’s back to square one. Still not done with being blind to patterns that undo you every time You just won’t learn,...


All I have on it is prayer. I have to take it to God. I’m a limited being. My daughter and Bubby Jr. showed up at my door last night. She sat on my stairs and cried and cried. So I told her to ta...


September 14, 2019

Doctors & Health Stuff in meh...

To get to the meat of the matter… I woke up 2 nights in a row with a pain. I can’t say it was in my chest, but I can’t rule it out. The first night wasn’t so bad. Last night, the pain lasted long...


September 11, 2019

So, I Cried in meh...

Today’s shenanigans consisted of my daughter dropping Bubby Jr with my son so he can take him to daycare. Daycare wouldn’t take him. He hasn’t been for a month. Of course they couldn’t take him. ...


September 09, 2019

So. Tacky. in meh...

My daughter is…ugh… I got to her Facebook page. She, within a 24hr period posted a bunch of stuff she’s laughing about, talking stuff about, to posts about Bubby Jrs dad and they are…::makes gag...


September 09, 2019

I Saw & I Thought in meh...

A picture of Bubby Jr. I haven’t seen him in so long…about a month it’s been. I started tearing up. He’s getting so big. Me and Bubby Sr. have said that we missed him. I don’t miss him enough to ...


September 09, 2019

Unexpected: Update in meh...

The story I was looking at was Bubby Jr’s dad. The story had been updated as of 3:30 something this afternoon. Out of respect for his mother, I will go to the service. Firefighters called the po...


September 08, 2019

Unexpected in meh...

So after some Facebook digging, I found its true. My littlest grandson’s father has been killed. My daughter texted me last night when she found out, but offered no details when I asked what hap...


September 04, 2019

Just Messing Around In My Head in meh...

For one moment, I had a glimpse of what you would look like Wrapped in me I come to my senses because you don’t exist Just a mist in my head of what I want “I want you, ‘cause you make my heart s...


August 27, 2019

::Heavy Sighs:: in meh...

I’m sleepy because my insides decided to betray me. I have been up most of the night, just bottoming my life out. I took the same detox stuff I always take and it has had a bad effect on me this...


August 23, 2019

August 23, 2018 in meh...

Have you ever felt like there are things you will not stand for from anyone, but there is one person that makes you break every rule you have? You say you’re going to put your foot down and then ...


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