Ada O. ⋅ 35

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Well, I got a job. The job is at Brueggers. I managed to get it because all the goths that used to work there quit. All of them. They hired me because I am eighteen and have bagel experience....


Well, Emma called. She says that Molly and I have been disappointments to her as friends, because sheĆ­s been friends with us since sixth grade and when she was out of school we abandoned her. Sh...


Saturday I had another minor emotional breakdown. I went clothes shopping with my mom, because I needed clothes, and found myself completely incapable of interacting with people. I knew I was a...


Important things have happened since I last wrote. Even when I did write, I didn't write about the important things. My birthday has come and gone. I am eighteen now. Finals and the semester ...


The reason I haven't been writing is that almost every interaction I have had with my friends during the past two weeks has made me want nothing more to do with any of them. Nothing more to do w...


I haven't felt like writing lately. I recently wrote an entry but then acccidentally deleted it, which was very frustrating and is now adding to this feeling. Some slightly depressing things ha...


The day that I was out sick before vacation, Bonnie called me and asked if I was doing anything that night. This caught me off guard. "Uh... Well... I guess I'm not doing anything..." "Oh so.....


I haven't written in a while. I kept meaning to, but It's been a weird week. I kind of feel like I spent it all recovering from Thursday. It's surreal, knowing where I'm going to college in no...


Thursday absolutely sucked up until five o'clock. In fact, the closer five o'clock came, the more things sucked. From about four to about four thirty, I looked at the clock about twenty-five ti...


I have been trying to decide for a while whether to call First Choice College by its real name here. I went through the same thing with the city I live near. I tried to be anonymous at first, b...


I find out in an hour and forty five minutes whether or not I got into First Choice College. The concert is also tonight. The concert during which my jazz band will make its debut. Practice ye...


The Monday morning after it was established that the band died again, I came into school and said to Dave, "What about Speedy?" He looked interested. "Speedy," he said, interestedly. "Speedy."...


This morning when I first became conscious, I felt okay. Several seconds later, I remembered that I should be feeling awful for some reason. Then in another several seconds it came to me why. ...


Band season is over. The parade and banquet were on Sunday. I was pretty grumpy through the parade because the new tuba kid, who really isn't too bright, was marching too close to me and dented...


Can we talk about how much of a slacker I am? I am a huge slacker. I really spend just about all of my time at home doing whatever I damn well please, even though maybe I should be doing some F...


When we went to the concert - before we got there, actually - the first thing I noticed was the way people looked. It was ludicrously noticable. In fact, we didn't even have to look at a map to...


Well, I suppose the first bit of news is that I am going to the Reel Big Fish concert tonight. This, like many things in my life, is less exciting than it should be. I guess it hasn't completely ...


I have not been this miserable in a while. I have something really nasty. It makes me cough so much that my stomach muscles hurt. Sometimes I feel like I am coughing up my adam's apple. It ge...


I'm sick again. Sick enough to be rendered pretty immoble and useless. I was out of school yesterday, and today I didn't even make it through first block before I had to go home. I was too sic...


Saturday after the SAT2s, Dave came by to drop off my keys because I'd left them at his house. The SAT2s, as I mentioned in the last entry, were very upsetting, especially when I had already bee...


Lately I have been just sick enough to be less conscious. I don't really experience. I just sort of exist. I existed through marching band finals Sunday, feeling tired and nauseous and not qui...


Friday was a little bit better than things have been in general recently. Because finals were this weekend, we had a spirit day. Eric and Schultz came up with Lucky Charms day - every section w...


Lately I've been feeling like everything I do is kind of pointless and kind of absurd. I've been doing it anyway, hard. I have thrown myself into it, because what else is there to do, really? ...


Last night I dreampt that I had sex with Dave. Twice. I dreampt it once, and then I woke up, and then I fell asleep and had a different dream where I did it again. Wait, it gets worse. First ...


Music is eating my life again, so I really haven't had time to write. Just know that I am still alive, and that since I last wrote I have had five performances, three minor emotional breakdowns,...


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