Entries 176

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Happy Thanksgiving

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Everyone is the fakest, worst version of themselves. I hate their stupid fucking posts. I hate their pictures. I hate the dumb shit they have to say that is never original. There are people i...

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The knee jerk reaction is “No, of course not.” But let’s set emotion aside and really think about this…is there a time when suicide is actually the answer? Is there a time when murder is the an...

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I’m doing alright man. I haven’t been on here in a bit. I’ve been too busy with work…and I’m in the process of writing a book, so that is where all of my writing energy has gone to as of late. ...

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I haven’t been taking my meds lately…mostly in part to the fear that they are slowly killing me. And I was feeling fine until last week when I started purposefully making bad music and I decided ...

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I don’t really come to this site very often anymore. I don’t have the time to kill usually…and I don’t really have anything very interesting to say. But I’m alone at the office right now, waitin...

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I quite Facebook again and then kind of stopped doing all social media. But I figure this site isn’t so much social media as other sites…it can still get dramatic sometimes though, that’s for su...

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I woke up at 3:30am Sunday morning and decided I should try to create an electronic song that was upbeat and kind of positive and beautiful. I failed miserably. I definitely made the most gothi...

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My wife and I stepped outside to go get a load of laundry and our apartment manager was out talking to one of our neighbors with a bunch of police officers. She was the victim of a home invasion...

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In the summer of 2020, during the BLM marches, they burned down several buildings in my community. The tore apart the police station. They looted countless businesses. I expect more of that toni...

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Sometimes I think I love my job Sometimes I think I hate my job I guess we’ll see how I feel tomorrow when pay day comes around. Sometimes I want to write happy music (Why the fuck can’t I just ...

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I want to write some new music but I don’t have any new music inside of me and I don’t know how to put it inside of me…and even if it is inside of me and maybe I’m not recognizing it, maybe I don...

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I feel like writing but I don’t really have anything to say. It’s 4:07 PM and I haven’t eaten anything yet today. I’ve been glued to my desk. I’ve taken two bathroom breaks, and other than tha...

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Half our team is in Krakow and this insane deadline is still looming over us like a dark cloud filled with pus and rats and purple lightning cancer. So After working nine straight hours from 9-6...

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It’s been in the works for a while now. I went a few weeks without a drink not even that long ago, but last weekend, with all the friends and family in town for the baby shower, I definitely had ...

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They tested me for ADHD in middle school a bunch of times…like three times. They tested me several times because the test came back and said I didn’t have it, but everyone was like, “Uh…yeah this...

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Thank you brother For teaching me about the white gloves The us VS them And why we need a poker face Thank you for teaching me about the indigo flame Thank you for teaching me about where I came...

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…someone replaced all your creamer with mayonnaise I can’t stop thinking about putting mayonnaise in coffee. I don’t even use creamer, I drink my coffee African-American like a real man. We wen...

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It’s 12:34 am and I’m wrapping up some work for the evening. But I have to finish the last couple of tracks on this Kendrick album, so I figured I’d kill some time on here while I listen. We’ve ...

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I think the most frustrating thing is that I don’t even get to experience manic episodes anymore…which, means I also don’t have psychotic episodes…but it’s pretty one sided. The antipsychotics I...

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I’ve had a few coworkers ask me about my music over the last few months, and it’s something I have been hesitant to share with anyone, let alone the people I work with. But I picked out a song or...

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So I blocked the user that left that last comment. She said she was a reader for a long time and has read my cocaine fueled and pill fueled “and every drug under the sun” fueled “rants”. Then sh...

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So, on my last post…you know, the one about how I thought my neighbor was being an asshole for being super judgmental? Some user named “Out of Doubt: End time” commented this: “You should have w...

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We have these neighbors that are Mormon, and we’ve been pretty good friends with them over the last couple of years, but starting in August the husband has started saying some shit that is just p...

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