Superposition ⋅ 33

Earth is a great place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live here.

Entries 137

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I did some astral projecting last night. Traveled to see my boss and talk to her about everything. She said she knew that everything was out of her control and she knew everyone was pissed off ...


I slept in today. I still can’t remember my dreams, but I know I’m having them. Today is 4-20, so I’m going to buy an eighth of some really nice stuff to take to a party at Deanne’s place, but ...


I blew up for the first time in a long time. I feel like a total asshole. I want to crawl into a hole and die. But I was just pushed too far. I was asked to help open this restaurant…so I cam...


Eating acid in an empty mansion by the beach was a really good time. So, about Lex. I met Lex through Brittany a few years ago, I was super depressed and Brittany offered to come over to cheer m...


The Alpha Brain is finally kicking in, I think. Last night my dreams were insanely vivid. It’s crazy because I even felt like, at a few points, I began to question if I was in reality or not, but...


I wish these human bodies had detachable parts. I have the worst headache right now, and I honestly believe with all of my heart that if I could just take my brain out and soak it in some saline...


Maybe I should just kill them all? Maybe that would be easier? I wonder if I could kill all of my friends fast enough, before the ones still alive started to catch on to what was happening…I’ll...


Waking up early is really fucking with me. I’m not sleeping any earlier still…it’s been about a week and a half. On Monday I woke up at 5:45, so I think I got approximately four hours of sleep?...


“I was feeling for a while that maybe you didn’t feel good about being friends or wanted to keep me at a distance or something because I felt like I always hit you up but I’d never hear from you ...


Yesterday was a good day, which is cool, because I have been having good days in spite of some difficult feelings I’ve been having lately, so I’m glad that I’m able to do that. I woke up early a...


Seriously, what the fuck? Can’t we just skip to the part where we’re comfortable with eachother and we can be real with eachother and it doesn’t feel like a chess match? Not tonight, apparently...


So, I haven’t talked to Brittany in quite some time now. I don’t know how long it’s been, but definitely over a month. She’s complicated because I’ve known her for several lifetimes, so we have…...


I’m trying to keep a dream journal as part of the lucid dreaming project, but so far I haven’t remembered my dreams either night since I’ve started. So…I dunno, maybe I should cut back on the flo...


I’m trying to keep a dream journal as part of the lucid dreaming project, but so far I haven’t remembered my dreams either night since I’ve started. So…I dunno, maybe I should cut back on the flo...


So…dating…what a topic. Why have I decided I want to start dating all of the sudden? I don’t know…maybe it’s the episode I have every spring? Maybe I just want to fuck? I’m intimidated at the ...


I felt fine all day at orientation, it was good seeing my old bosses in a new setting and I work with some of my old co-workers that I really get along with, so it was cool, everything was cool. ...


So, I wrote this whole long entry…and it was basically just some cry baby tirade about how mad I am at tattoo culture, and I said a lot of really means things…that I actually meant, but that I di...


I just don’t ever want to lose or forget this: “One more thing: I prayed for a friend like you for years. I swear to god. You are totally one of the most captivating, beautiful and sweetest huma...


March 30, 2019

Unrequited in Questions

I feel guilty for the way I feel…or maybe, the way I don’t feel? I feel like, maybe there’s something wrong with me, like maybe I’m not seeing something obvious. When we were in Salt Lake City,...


March 30, 2019

Angel of Punishment in Questions

Two days in a row now I’ve drawn Kushiel: Angel of Punishment, as my divination for the day. It’s not a good card I’m being called out for something…and I had a feeling I knew what it was, but I...


I’m compelled to sit down and write right now. I’ve also been feeling the call to start painting again…last night I almost picked up a pen and started doodling…I came really close. On this road ...


I haven’t had a job for about a week and a half. I quit my job because I had another one lined up, but the starting date for that job keeps getting pushed back. I’m not worried about it, I’m just...


I can’t spend all of my time thinking about the fourth dimension. Sometimes I need to remember that I’m right here, right now. …I’m actually really good at living in “the now”. Probably too goo...


Mixed states are something that are relatively new to me…I can’t remember if they started before I began my medication or not…I feel like they may have, but I was just talking to someone last nig...


My entire life I have had a reactive merkaba, and for the first time in my life I am working on tuning it to be active. I’ve been having moments of near ascension lately, and I can only assume t...