Manorexic (he/then) ⋅ 40 ⋅

Manorexia - I have a dating disorder

A comfort zone is a beautiful place but nothing ever grows there

Entries 1,685

Page 67 of 68

September 25, 2017

Midlife crisis on route in Current Events

I was cleaning up my facial hair situation when I accidentally fucked it all up and had to remove it all to reset it. I had a goatee for a year now. I liked how people treated me differently. I w...


September 06, 2017

Somebody in Current Events

Things that triggered my depression do not trigger me anymore but I still have been feeling down lately. I am lonely. I wish I had a companion. When my 2 year old niece laughs or smiles she looks...


September 01, 2017

Move along in Current Events

Today was a little interesting. Work has been getting a little toxic for me lately. Today I accidentally told my boss how I have been feeling. I call it an accident because I haven’t even told my...


August 20, 2017

Open wounds in Quick Thoughts

I am overwhelmed. I felt lonely for a second and some of my scars have opened. I don’t know if I am depressed because I kind of like how sad I feel. I had been so numb for so long. I’m actually l...


My body has been going through some changes lately but I noticed a change in myself that is major. I have been living with depression for as long as I can remember and I honestly couldn’t imagine...


August 02, 2017

Strength in Current Events

The other day I had that holy ghost experience. Yesterday I think I understood why. I was feeling burdened and irritable because I just wanted to do nothing after I dropped my niece off at daycar...


July 31, 2017

Wander in Current Events

I think experienced the holy ghost or something this morning. After I dropped my niece off at her daycare I returned home to make myself some breakfast and have some Matcha tea before I went for ...


July 24, 2017

Frenemies in Current Events

My best friend got married yesterday to the man I set her up with. I was a bridesmaid and Tyler was the maid of honor. The bride left me out of all the planning because she gets me but Tyler was ...


July 13, 2017

Disconnected in Quick Thoughts

I can’t connect to anything. Not to my tv shows or music. Not to my social media or text messages. I can’t connect to anyone. Not to my family or my friends. I don’t even feel depressed I’m just ...


July 06, 2017

Adrift in Current Events

Does that existential dread ever leave? I feel like we all harbor it. It’s unique to us all but it’s right there burning a hole in our hearts and making us feel like we never have enough. It’s ri...


June 26, 2017

Coming Out pt2 in Current Events

I figured out the source of my severe anxiety from a couple weeks ago and I have been making some major changes to my lifestyle. To combat my cystic acne issues I was debating quitting dairy. The...


June 13, 2017

Commercial in Current Events

I have been experiencing some pretty intense anxiety the last couple days. For no reason it appears. It was like I was getting gut punched the whole time. I barely ate at all. Honestly. Anyway in...


I had the house to myself May long weekend and I decided that I would have a guy over. It’s been a year and a half since I lost my v-card. My first and probably my last Grindr hookup because it w...


I think I just got too good at hiding from the existential dread. I quit alcohol a couple weeks ago. I just wanted a cleanse. My reasons for that were small but now I feel that I have something b...


Sometimes I like to let my demons out to play for some reason. I had been so stressed with work that I was going to crazy and taking everybody with me. I was even bumming cigarettes off an employ...


April 15, 2017

Indulge me in Current Events

I’m being an idiot. Zach and I were play fighting over space at work and he went to squeeze behind me at one point and I pushed my tush against him and was like “oh papi” and then he got flustere...


April 07, 2017

iLike likes in Quick Thoughts

Brent Everett, the pornstar commented on my latest IG post. It was just an emoji and basically click bait but I accept the ego boost. Brent Corrigan liked a selfie of mine last year and I fangirl...


April 04, 2017

My Fuck Boys in Current Events

Suddenly I’m a life coach to the fuck boys I work with. I know “kids” look up to me and such but not this many attractive straight guys at once. It’s just 3 but I’m in my dirty 30s and they give ...


March 29, 2017

Game Over in Current Events

It has about run its course. I tend to turn my feelings for somebody else into something toxic for everyone. I didn’t let it get that far this time. No obsessive boy disorder. I think my night on...


I don’t want my narrative to be about a boy. I do have other things going on. A friend of mine is part of an art exhibit tonight. I might go. If I don’t I will just ask him all about it because i...


I figured out what I am going to do. I am explaining this situation with Zach to my Manager and I will make a sexual harassment claim. Nobody will lose their job over this I assume. I could not s...


March 20, 2017

Crossfire in Current Events

I might be exhausting myself to save face around Zach. I am definitely exhausting myself trying not to talk about him. It’s hard. I have to get this out today however. He keeps throwing shade. He...


Yesterday I really missed an old friend. He lost his battle with alcoholism a few years ago. It is a long story for another time but he was like an older brother to me. He was so smart and wise. ...


Ok… so there is something wrong with me. Last week I remembered this guy I used to work with whom I hadn’t heard anything about in years. He didn’t have FB then but he has it now so I added him. ...


March 05, 2017

Case closed in Current Events

Alright alright alright. I explained to Zach today that he was confusing me with his jokes about being sexually confused and his fake flirting with me and we set the record straight and made some...


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