cheesyemoheart ⋅ 26

"It has been said time heals all wounds. I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue, and the pain lessens, but it is never gone."

Rose Kennedy

Entries 243

Page 5 of 10

Things were ours. Things were ours for such a long time and I got comfortable with that. Now everything’s gone back to being yours or mine and I have to learn how to be me without you all over a...


A) What does the last text you sent say? And to whom? -Regular text? “Drunk words are sober thoughts” to Krista, Messenger? “I’m gonna come up with another halloween costume. There’s no way I’ll ...


I don’t ever put trigger warnings on my journal because it’s mine and I don’t write for anyone else but If anyone reads this I talk about suicide. Things have been rough around here for most of ...


It always comes back to this fucking song. Why does it always come back to this? At least young, emo me is content with it.


I think this is survey thingy number 4? possibly 5. Here we go: A. Why did your last relationship end? -Emotional abuse, manipulation, and a bunch of other bullshit. B. Favourite band? -I don’t ...


I’ve always been someone who believed in “signs”. On the flipside I dont believe in coincidences (most times anyway). Well, I was in the basement last night clipping Squirt’s fur and getting inc...


I have some down time and I don’t want to get into the rant from the past few days so I’m just going to do a few more dumb survey thingies. Does anyone actually read these? Probably not. tell me...


I can’t focus enough to write a real entry today so prepare for survey hell. Do you have any regrets? -One but I don’t consider it a regret because it was never my choice Do you have a deep, da...


Today feels like water. Too much rain, too many puddles, an ocean, teardrops, heavy fog, dew in the grass, Squirt’s wet beard, a pond where a field used to be. I can’t even explain why because ...


September 27, 2018

Goldfish in In My World

Skye and I finally talked some last night which of course turned into a lot of me crying. He asked “Why are we still doing this?” and I said “Because I fucking love you and I want to be with you....


September 23, 2018

Ugh. in In My World

Just once I would like someone to see me with a baby in my arms and not be able to stop themselves from swooning a little. I want them to not quite be able to stop themselves from picturing me wi...


The difference between you and everyone else is that when they cuddle with me it just feels like cuddles but when you cuddle me… you hold me. You make the bad go away. You make me feel safe and ...


September 20, 2018

Sesame Street in In My World

I’m sitting here at work with Helen laying in my lap with her blanket watching Sesame Street. Shes sucking her thumb and yawning. Shes got a red mark on her face from this morning when she trippe...


September 17, 2018

I need a title? in In My World

I just got gut punched by what feels like an anxiety crash but I haven’t been awake long enough to have the panic part of things. I dont know what’s wrong with me. It feels like something is squ...


I havent done one of these in years but I thought fuck it, might as well. August 20, 2018 1: Name -Emilie 2: Age -23 going on 24 3: 3 Fears -Being alone in the dark -Spiders -Tengo miedo de per...


I hate moving. I hate moving. I hate moving. I hate moving. I hate moving. I’m trying to calm down and not have a panic attack because there is too much that needs to be done today and I dont ha...


August 30, 2018

Home. in In My World

She told me last night that I was home to her. I could have cried. It made me feel so much better because I knew exactly how much it meant to her to say it out loud. How much it means to me. A c...


August 30, 2018

Random Thoughts in In My World

The words “don’t lose the other one” are going to be ringing in my head for days. I know she’s right but I just can’t make myself take the steps I need to to make it happen. What if it never doe...


It occurs to me mid story sometimes that when people as what happened or how things were or anything like that they just want the general information. Well when I tell stories I have a tendency t...


August 19, 2018

Finally in In My World

From Thursday until earlier today I was with protector the whole time. I finally met all the animals and some of his family. I finally got some relief from the stress and back pain and I’m just ...


August 16, 2018

White Noise in In My World

I woke up to a message my friend sent me last night that said “Past your bedtime little one” and I’ve been thinking about it all morning. Ugh. I’m sure he doesn’t even know but it was enough to m...


Sometimes I forget all the fucked up shit I’ve been through in my life. People like to tell me that “you’ve been through more in x time than most people have been in their whole lives” and I’ve ...


August 05, 2018

I'm not fine at all. in In My World

Being in this house reminds me of you because I can almost see you sitting there, expressionless. I thought you were mad at me and I never figured out why. I talked and talked and you just let me...


I woke up about 20 minutes ago, barely conscious and confused, I checked my phone. 1:17. Well fuck I was supposed to be at my bosses house hours ago. Guess I’ll go tomorrow. I had a dream about ...


I had a few bad dreams two nights ago, one of which was semi lucid. I haven’t told anyone yet but that one is still fucking with me some. Like… More than I’m sure of. I can’t sleep. I want to bu...


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