littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,474
Page 63 of 219
dec 14 in idea barrages
There’s no easier way to set yourself up to be tricked & used & exploited than to allow yourself hatred. Give yourself over to hate, of anyone, of anything, and the conmen & preache...
dec 13 in idea barrages
A reality show to be the next voice and puppeteer of ALF called PROJECT SHUMWAY. “Arrested for public urination” is such an ugly way to phrase it. Why not say you were “caught in a peed trap”...
dec 12 in idea barrages
I feel like we are but one desperate cable-television series pitch cycle away from the spin-off 90 DAY DIVORCEE. B.Y. Jove! A British Commonwealth hero! B.Y. Jove is there! Less dehumidifie...
dec 11 in idea barrages
They are not your usual orthopedic doctors. They like to say they’re the un-ortho docs. Not only is Train lame as hell but, worse, they called their wine “Drops of Jupiter” instead of making ...
dec 10 in idea barrages
I sometimes forget that The Brothers Karamazov are a book and not a circus trapeze team. Until America treats slavery and the Confederacy with the seriousness and severity with which Germany ...
dec 9 in idea barrages
Morning radio is now just strangers pretending to be 20 years younger, describing YouTube videos that trended a month ago. Play some music, Buzzsaw and the Chipmunk or whatever. Your Geograph...
prompt: ring, title: the gifted in misc. flash fiction
My generation didn’t ask for those participation trophies, you know. That’s the thing the stories get wrong, we didn’t want an awards ceremony for next-to-last-place in the youth soccer league. W...
dec 8 in idea barrages
A world left to the zealots, zealots of any stripe, is a world that will quickly burn down. They don’t have the patience, they only care for the immediate enforcement of everything they believe...
dec 7 in idea barrages
I hope in the new Mulan movie, the theme is the theme to the old He-Man cartoon except “Mu-LAN, Mu-LAN” instead of “He-MAN, He-MAN”. I like to believe that the Punky Brewster cartoon with the...
dec 6 in idea barrages
If candy corn didn’t have the Halloween nostalgia connection, they would be cast off in the “ancient oddities from when people had to settle for terrible candy because the good stuff hadn’t bee...
dec 5 in idea barrages
If you manage to kick Clay Aiken in the crotch, he is legally obligated to yell “OH MY AIKEN BALLS!” in the same way that if you manage to punch down onto a leprechaun’s hat, he is obligated to...
dec 4 in idea barrages
I’m just sayin we could reboot Morganna the Kissing Bandit as Buffy the Umpire Slayer. I am “my first computer games were on a Commodore 64” years old. An Alice In Chains parody about the ...
dec 3 in idea barrages
Your D&D team’s traveling stagecoach was sold to you by bird-man named Lee Aarakocra. If dogs get kennel cough, do they also get pounding headaches? I am not judging, simply being healt...
dec 2 in idea barrages
“Oh, my old boomerang,” she said, going through her mementos from her semester in Australia, “that’s a real throwback.” My generation looks at the rubble wrought by disease, war and stolen el...
dec 1 in idea barrages
Why call the video game “Duck Hunt” when we could’a called it “Murder Most Fowl”? A Klingon character called Ra’fless so that someone can comment on his forehead “Ruffles has ridges!” As cl...
prompt: disbelief, title: staying at the mirage in misc. flash fiction
She stared at him in disbelief, which is to say she stared at her boyfriend in Disbelief, Nevada. Disbelief, named as such since no one believed its founder’s claims he was building a shining cit...
nov 30 in idea barrages
She’s the loose canon one slip-up away from getting kicked off the force. He’s the rookie just out of the academy who was magically conjured from a children’s book. Together they fight crime… a...
nov 29 in idea barrages
I love when fads completely come and go without me. It’s the best thing about being old. “Whipped coffee”? Nah, dog. I don’t need my java in Nickelodeon Gak form. Now it’s deader than the Charl...
nov 28 in idea barrages
A rap about Alfred E Neuman called “Baby Got Blech”. If every single sponsored ad on Youtube is “by a company I would sing the praises of even if they didn’t pay me” then… maaaaaaaybe a whole...
nov 27 in idea barrages
I hope that on the Enterprise they call their ship’s bathhouse “The Docking Bay”. That’d be clever. If Disney ever wants to counter Space Jam, here’s my pitch: Dunk Tales. The thing about c...
nov 26 in idea barrages
Your corporation’s leader of COVID compliance should be called a Chief Personal Protection Practice Officer so she or he can call her or himself the company’s “C-3P-O”. The maximal name for a...
nov 25 in idea barrages
If the couple are supervillains, is the honey-do list a honey-doom list? I kind of get it when a small news websites hit me with the “YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF PROTECTING YOUR COMPUTER FROM VI...
nov 24 in idea barrages
The woman in the stirrups looked down in stunned silence that her 14 hours of labour produced not a human baby but rather a piping hot pizza. “It wasn’t delivery,” the doctor sadly intoned, “it...
nov 23 in idea barrages
I saw a sign for a Chinese restaurant called Great Wall and I was transfixed with how awesome it would be if it just said “Eat Wall”. When I win the lotto, I shall bribe them to remove the G an...
nov 22 in idea barrages
I knew a man Bazinga and he mocked the weird With worn-out tropes Nerd cliches, a dumb catchphrase and forced laugh-track Dashing all hope He feigned OCD He feigned OCD Mocking a real disease M...
