idea barrages

by littlefallsmets

Entries 2,107

Page 1 of 85

10 hours ago

apr 1

If I just called every country act out there “Cody Codyngton” I’d probably be right like 83% of the time. If you legally change your name to “Serious Inquiries” you’re going to get a leg up o...

1 day ago

mar 31

An adventuring party of five bards that operate under the cover of being a boy band called “Fifth Edition”. Passion is wonderful as a starting point but it’s no end to itself. Passion is inco...

2 days ago

mar 30

Even if you actually thought Woody Allen wasn’t a weapons-grade sex criminal, what a weird hill to die on. He hasn’t had a good idea in years and years, he hasn’t had a new idea in like four de...

3 days ago

mar 29

March 5th? Only 80 days till spring! The rallying cry for waking up before 5 in the am “lets do thos before we talk ourselves out of it!” Order, chaos, law, anarchy, these are all just abst...

5 days ago

mar 28

“How it should be” is a trap laid to stop you from doing anything. The tools you have before you, as they are, what good can you reasonably do with them now? What little improvements can you ma...

5 days ago

mar 27

Some people, if they like formal study, they’re academic. Some people like disease outbreaks, they’re epidemic. But if you like both, you’re pandemic. Your album of Alpine folk covers of Beck...

6 days ago

mar 26

Sadly, the Doctor was never able to fit the Monster with the soft-rock-singing module he’d been constructing for him, the Michael Bolt-On. Are you your body or the blood within? Are you good ...

7 days ago

mar 25

The words we use and how we use them manipulate the very world around us but no amount of words, no matter how precise, could ever define you. A conscious mind is a special case, a micro realit...

March 22, 2020

mar 24

I wouldn’t call myself a first prize but I’m a lot more than a participation trophy. I’m a hell of an honourable mention. The perfect name for a twee soft alt rock band from northern New York...

March 21, 2020

mar 23

If you tell someone something, they probably won’t believe it if it doesn’t match their preconceptions or, at best, they’ll only understand it on a surface level. If you hide it in a riddle the...

March 20, 2020

mar 22

No, I can’t say that I have faith in the American electorate at large. Faith, to paraphrase DUNE, is for Sunday meditations and loveplay. Looking at similar cycles in the past and seeing how th...

March 19, 2020

mar 21

I look forward to the day Taylor Swift finally takes to combat with her mortal enemy Taylor Leisurely. Having finally shaken the girl off his trail, the wolf snarked to himself “more like Lit...

March 18, 2020

mar 20

Part man, part indigestion relief, all cop. BROMOCOP. Part man, part radio ad liner, all cop. PROMOCOP. But that I could convert some of the retail space in Herkimer abandoned due to the Wa...

March 17, 2020

mar 19

A compilation of the Toronto punk scene called “Oi Canada!”? A parody of Bittersweet Symphony about Transformers built around the phrase “I can change, I can change, I can change, I can chang...

March 16, 2020

mar 18

If you’re accused of being the Loch Ness monster, are you allegendary? If Robin Hood was the Prince of Thieves, was his dad the Burglarking? A hip-hop version of RENT called BOHEMIAN RAP CI...

March 15, 2020

mar 17

Of course Hubbard’s western has characters named Mart Kincaid and Gar Malone in it. Those are exactly the names a disordered mind would think belongs in an oater. People seem to have forgotte...

March 14, 2020

mar 16

Hopefully whenever we get to the point that McDonalds puts little dents in the Chicken McGriddles and call ‘em McChicken McWaffles, we’ll finally be rid of this stunt food fad for a while. A ...

March 13, 2020

mar 15

UNPOPULAR EMOTIONAL REACTION: Often, the cringe of THE OFFICE was not cathartic insofar as similar feelings in life, rather doubled them down and made me feel worse. The god of wine and thund...

March 12, 2020

mar 14

Trump is torn on whether to pardon Weinstein, of course. He’ll do nearly anything to protect a fellow wealthy sex-criminal but doesn’t want to accidentally alienate his core base of frothing an...

March 11, 2020

mar 13

I’ve had too much privilege, too many advantages to have a right to be angry. I’ll leave being angry about the world to the people who have the right to be, I’m going to stick with alternating ...

March 10, 2020

mar 12

UNPOPULAR OPINION: In most cases, gravy just covers over the core deliciousness of a food with greasy unctuousness. There are exceptions but most of the time, if something is well-prepared, gra...

March 09, 2020

mar 11

A thrash punk cover of Mad World could really punish. You know, of all the lines to identify with in RENT, the writer probably didn’t intend “I’m a New Yorker, fear’s my life” as one of those...

March 08, 2020

mar 10

Knowing he would some day inherit the family’s shredded cheese fortune, he was a man of grate expectations. I wonder if one of those loan-bundling scam houses has ever tried to license the Da...

March 07, 2020

mar 9

The Kool-Aid Man bursts through the wall at Jonestown, moments after the act, horrified, realizes what he indirectly has wrought and simply gasps “Oh no…” Yes I was singing a version of Copa ...

March 06, 2020

mar 8

Would be messiahs tend to just get good men killed and bad men into a killing mood. Who taught the Duke’s son to wear his snowsuit fitted in the lake effect fashion? I am so tired of having...

Book Description

originally, I went to college to be a comedy writer
the urge to still generate short form ideas remains
I collect, once or twice a day, my one-liner jokes
and my germs of ideas that I litter on social media
into little collections I call “barrages”
and then I put them here