littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅

I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.

with enough repetition, your flaws become your style

@Cecconi140

Entries 5,474

Page 56 of 219

Lot’s wife had a name, just like anyone else, any god or person through the ages, it’s just that the people who wrote it down didn’t think it mattered. Didn’t think she mattered. Too for Job’s wi...


May 01, 2021

may 3 in idea barrages

I don’t know how therapeutic reiki is or isn’t, I just know that if you say it two times in a row, it sounds like you’re scratching a record. It’s okay to admit that every time in your life y...


May 01, 2021

may 2 in idea barrages

Love when a Twitter profile’s just a bunch of job titles there’s no way you could be all at the same time: “Manager/Actor/Writer/Trainer/Producer/Model/Influencer/Photographer/Lawnmower Repair”...


May 01, 2021

may 1 in idea barrages

You promised Tarantino you were going to wear open-toed sandals but you showed up in closed-toe sandals and now he’s calling you a Crocs tease. Even the best periscope is sub optimal. If Co...


April 28, 2021

apr 30 in idea barrages

Only a little iced tea left? Put more ice in there. A LOT more ice in there. Repeat until you have homeopathic iced tea. A show about the security guards for a gated-community’s homeowners as...


April 28, 2021

apr 29 in idea barrages

If someone claims to be knowledgeable on Scottish history but seems suspiciously ignorant on the topic, yell “PICTS OR IT DIDN’T HAPPEN”. I hope we get aliens from Vega here, some day, and ev...


April 28, 2021

apr 28 in idea barrages

An emo song called “Don’t Fear The Weeper”. Yeah, Hogwarts has chocolate frogs, that’s cool. But you know what’s REALLY cool? CARMEL CARMEL CARMEL CARMEL CHAMELEONS. It just struck me that ...


April 25, 2021

apr 27 in idea barrages

Any time I read the phrase “youth hockey” I briefly imagine it means that they use children as the puck. The Kings of Leon are releasing their album as a Bitcoin? Damn, first just their sex w...


April 25, 2021

apr 26 in idea barrages

Name-brand string cheese just hits different. Napkin pitch for season two of Wandavision: Wanda and Darcy go on a Thelma & Louise - style roadtrip together to try and get her mind off the...


April 25, 2021

apr 25 in idea barrages

If the publicly intoxicated are thrown in the drunk tank, are the publicly stoned thrown in the dank tank? I like to imagine that for over two centuries, the seven Presidents of the United St...


At the western edge of town, there’s the first gas station headed in or (more likely) headed out, the Dawn Mart, open five A.M to midnight, for all your lottery or beer or milk or beer or gas or ...


April 22, 2021

apr 24 in idea barrages

In England, the head of a restaurant kitchen is called a “Cheoff”. We only serve one dish: General Tsiao’s Chicken in a bread bowl. We are PANDERA EXPRESS. A surrealistic drunken tour of a ...


April 22, 2021

apr 23 in idea barrages

Pizza Hut Pringles: once you PARP, you don’t starp! I love how the GOP’s only possible logical defense for using a Nazi-appropriated rune in their set design would be “No no, we’re just sayin...


April 22, 2021

apr 22 in idea barrages

Single-issue extremists falling down the rabbit hole of getting more and more repellent allies as they look for anyone who will back them up, it would be hilarious if it wasn’t so deleterious t...


There’s a saying “not all who wander are lost”, some people think it’s from the Grateful Dead, others think it’s from Led Zeppelin and in their ways, both are close, but it’s from Tolkien, old Jo...


April 19, 2021

apr 21 in idea barrages

I AM NOT A DANIMAL, the yogurt screamed, I AM A YOPLATIPUS! A country song entitled SHE STOLE MY TWEEZERS SO I HAD TO SHAVE MY EARS INSTEAD. If you want to make a bad children’s movie, you ...


April 19, 2021

apr 20 in idea barrages

Caught smoking behind the refrigerated birds exhibit, the manager just ordered the stoned zoologist into a meeting. “HR.” she said, “Puffin Stuff.” We’re gonna make your yardcare real easy by...


April 19, 2021

apr 19 in idea barrages

In the 1960s, American public schools were systematically exorcised of their ghosts in the controversial practice that came to be known as Forced Bustin’. It did not necessarily make everyone f...


April 16, 2021

apr 18 in idea barrages

“Bronson Pinchot’s been working out,” she cooed, “that’s one bulky Bartokamous.” Tim Allen wakes up in an insane asylum, gripped by the delusion he inherited the role of Father Christmas in T...


April 16, 2021

apr 17 in idea barrages

Be pedantic about 1990s post-grunge. “If you think about it, Big Head Todd was the REAL Monster.” A parody of Beck’s “Loser” about MTV News’ Kurt Loder would mystify anyone more than ten year...


April 16, 2021

apr 16 in idea barrages

How does Seal not have a “Kiss From A Rosé” wine on the market? A D&D item that specifically enhances Bard spells called The Orb of Royerson. WANTED: THE JOKER. FOR THE CRIMES OF: PICKI...


April 15, 2021

roadside attractions in poetry

seven hundred and sixty five miles from here to the fireworks shop those vaguely racist billboards advertise down the ninety-five one thousand six hundred and five from here to the d...


April 15, 2021

a little bit in poetry

born an incidental heir to the goddess Eris accidentally dated mostly German and Irish length of life led to leaving me airless superstitious and cowardly and dareless lacking from ...


Necessary errands of some kind or another drag you out into the world, near the beginning of the end of some terrible thing that’s nowhere near over but just close enough to an ending where you k...


April 12, 2021

apr 15 in idea barrages

“FedEx/UPS erotic fan-fiction?” “Ship it!” Your pain, your trauma, it didn’t make you who you are, not really. How you dealt with it, how you processed it, what you took from the process of h...


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