Entries 82
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no
I’m so sick of this feeling of wanting to die.
demons
My mind is a place where demons thrive. The darkness comforts them Let’s them feel as though they can speak They don’t realise that when they speak they’re hurting me Their thoughts are what my ...
love?
Is it possible to be in love this quickly. Maybe I’m just an emotional sap. I love him but am I in love with him. He fucking knows too. Why do I fall so hard. There’s nothing worse than telling y...
dates
So, the first date. It was fucking wonderful. So when I got there he was kinda jumpy, he said he does that when he’s nervous. It was only awkward for a few seconds and then we got talking and it ...
details
I need a keyboard, I want to write a proper entry. But alas, my laptop is broken and it’s also 2am so there’s no hope in hell for me to get up to use my brothers. I’ve got a few updates on life ...
.
Best friend is being selfish. What else is new. I don’t really understand her logic anymore. I’m sick of it but I don’t know how to call her on it. I’m hurting
online 'dating'
Got such a good response from the last entry! Nobody made me feel weird about feeling how I do about this guy. You’ve actually made me feel less weird and scared about meeting him. My best friend...
first date
So I’ve been talking to a guy on tinder for almost two months now. I know what you’re going to say, “that’s dangerous” “he could be anyone” blah blah blah. Which I have taken into consideration. ...
8/2
Just no
continuation
Saw the best friend yesterday. Met up with her before she finished college for the day. Saw her college friends and they asked me to go on the night out. Think that opened my friend’s mind a bit ...
nights out
So my best friend didn’t invite me out with her college friends last week because she wanted to have a night just them. I thought fair enough. Okay so then I asked her today if she wanted to go o...
body dismorphia
My best friend told me ages ago that she thought I had body dismorphia. I thought nothing of it. But for some reason today that came into my head again. I looked it up. It is like the definition ...
new year, same me
So it’s been a month since I’ve written here. Sorry about that. I’ve been having some serious issues. I’m extremely run down because I’m so depressed. Anything makes me really upset. (Even now, j...
troubles
Hating myself so much. So I texted the best friend yesterday saying that “are we ever going to talk again? :(” and that I missed her. She then tells me that I abandoned her in a time of need whic...
besties
What does one do when their best friend is being a bitch? Like she really insulted me, I told her to stop, that she’d gone too far and it was enough. I’m not the bad guy here. And yet, almost a w...
meh
I’m so sick of feeling like this. Feeling like I can’t do anything. Just wasting away the days. College feels like a mountain. I’m sick of this life
selfharm
So, I haven’t self harmed in a long time but I have been feeling awful the past two weeks, and so today I cut my stomach. It’s very open and I know I need stitches. I’m afraid to tell my mum thou...
10-11-14
I’m feeling very suicidal right now I can just hear the knives calling to me, and the tablets screaming at me to swallow them. This is unbearable. I don’t know how people get through this. No mor...
no
I don’t know what to say. I thought I had an entry in my head but I guess not. Back to college tomorrow after a week off and lets just say I’m feeling really bad. Starting to wonder if I even wan...
college
The past week has been a blur. All I know is I’ve been feeling awful. I have been enjoying college, but with ‘beauty college’, there are mirrors everywhere. I hate seeing myself around all of the...
desperate
Someone please help me. I can’t do this anymore
worsening
So the pencils I ordered got cancelled because there was something wrong with the order. Going to replace the order. But I was really only holding on by a thread and that thread has gotten very m...
:'(
The only thing keeping me from slicing off my arm right now is the fact that I ordered a set of pencils and want to use them before I risk serious injury. Current mood: kill me I have to go to co...
attitude
For fucks sake, just because I’m in college now and I’m 18 doesn’t mean I suddenly want to stay out all the time or that I want to sleep over on weekdays, especially at the start of the week. It ...
depression
I have yet to meet someone who understands what depression is like without actually ever suffering from it before. It is such a difficult thing to explain, and half of the time people just think ...
