Entries 24

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My head is pounding from stress. Today I caught a 9-year-old… jerkin’ his gerkin’ if you know what I mean. I won’t go into detail but the tl;dr is that another teacher and I witnessed it, I r...

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My update is that I’m tired, as usual. I realized that 6 out of the 8 months I’ve worked with this company I’ve had to work two weekends a month. I guess the compromise is I get to instead sta...

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“Comparison is the thief of happiness,” is a quote I’ve been hearing all week. From people online, people in person, and even in movies or TV shows I watch. I guess around this time of year it’...

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My Steamdeck came in today so I spent the day playing games. I only really have a few hobbies, my main one is playing games. When I moved to Japan, I left behind my desktop in a storage unit. S...

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Although this is an anonymous site, I wonder if I write all of my feelings will my s/o find this site one day. Will they snoop in my history, or catch me writing a post deep in the night and pr...

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Tired and stressed. Tomorrow I have a “big” day at work. I have to be a sales woman. My job is to entertain kids, get pictured and videoed, and then sell the fantasy to their parents. This is ...

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I cry so easily at the thought of my dad. Sometimes I wonder if my sister is similar to me or if she’s more numb to the feeling now. When the idea of having to see someone you love in their fin...

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I want to start reading again, even if it’s just little by little. Last night I started with, Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke by Eric Larocca Rating: ★★★☆☆ The book was interest...

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Doctor said I have been sick with a fever 6 times since May. Which is a lot even when working with kids. Because I have Japanese health insurance, they tested me for everything they could think ...

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Since moving to Japan, my ferret has enjoyed sleeping with me in my bed almost every night. In the U.S. she preferred sleeping alone. Occasionally in my bed but never next to me, I wasn’t allowe...

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I complain about being bad cop and the next day my coworker asks me to be her enforcer. One kid was particularly bad on Wednesday, so, she created a plan where the child would sit out the enti...

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I’m tired. I’m always tired. I’m trying to think of things to say, but my life is just work. I guess if I were to update about work, my update would be that I find myself having to be the ir...

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They give you crucial steps before moving in, call the: 1. Electricity Company 2. Water Company 3. Gas Company I was able to get all three done, well, I thought. Despite waking up at 7am on a...

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It’s been a hot minute since I’ve wrote anything about my life in any shape or form. I lived in a share house between May - early December. I finally moved to my own apartment over the weekend....

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Drunk and alone, walking home. I stop at the nearby shrine, divulging in the truths I’m afraid to admit. I reach the park. The grass is so green and full of life. unlike me. I take off my socks...

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I miss my ferret. I knew that it would take time to move her to Japan with me but going from seeing her almost every day for 4 yrs to nothing truly is saddening. When I would travel, I would mis...

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I’m not religious but something about the shrines in this country makes me feel like trying. I come to these shrines, purify myself and donate what I can. 50Y for luck, an extra 100Y for the caus...

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Yesterday I sit in class, the smell of his cologne wafting through the air continuously. I haven’t smelt it since 2019, but the smell is engrained in my memory. As I sit there thinking of him, wo...

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I envy minimalists and people who don’t attach sentimental value to objects. I’ve always loved cozy rooms that are cluttered, so I suppose I am the opposite: A maximalist. And even worse, I atta...

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To be honest, I want to write something but I don’t have much to say. I’m stressed out of my mind, I don’t have anything truly interesting swimming around up there. I’m just going to google a ra...

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It wasn’t a good day, but, what can you do? I won’t lie, I lose my shit privately on days like these. But as a passive person I can only advocate for myself so far before I begin to question if ...

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If you’re embarrassed to tell someone something, then does that mean that something is something worth being ashamed over. I love my partner but they struggle with jealousy and wanting to be in ...

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I wish I could be mad for myself but I feel like that would be coddling too. Everything is falling apart because I was ill prepared, and not because of anyone else. The person who offered to wa...

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I move to Japan in two weeks. I can feel the weight of everything on top of me, yet the stress I experience doesn’t motivate me. I’m confident in my want to go to Japan, however, I’m not confid...

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