littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,372
Page 3 of 215
sept 17 in idea barrages
The bad news is, everything’s a test. The good news is, no one’s keeping score. And we would’ve won the Laff-a-lympics, too, if it wasn’t for those medalling kids. The optimal name f...
s15 in idea barrages
Another great name for a band? SHART DECO. What kind of unholy fusion of “rural” and “hipster” would you have to be to unironically refer to Tractor Supply as “TSC”? Take the rhythm ...
s13 in idea barrages
Did they… give the terrible Garfield movie to Crisp Rat because Garfield’s “rediscovers terrible father who abandoned him” arc was the same as Guardians of the Galaxy 2 or… when they cast Ca...
prompt: area, title: look, up in the sky in misc. flash fiction
I don’t know that I necessarily believe any conspiracy theories, but God knows that I appreciate them. I love conspiracy theories for the way that they illuminate how people look at their world....
s11 in idea barrages
WEST SIDE STORY but instead of the Sharks and the Jets, it’s the Bloodhound Gang and the Insane Clown Posse. A parody of “When You Wish Upon A Star” about the Joker called “How You Think...
s9 in idea barrages
John Jacob Oppenheimer Schmidt, he has become death too, whenever he goes out, the people always shout, there goes John Jacob Oppenheimet Schmidt. Lovecraft was both obsessed with how aw...
s7 in idea barrages
How can you be a pirate if you’re in the Mohawk Valley where there is but one slender river fused with a canal? Don’t worry, baby, you can’t spell “Nautical” without “Utica”. Missionarie...
s5 in idea barrages
Strangers in the night? It doobie doobie do be like that, sometimes. Much rarer is the chiropractor who closes the session with a happy ending. They refer to themselves as “posturetutes”...
prompt: trial, title: what dreams may come in misc. flash fiction
One morning, after a night of troubled dreams about not gathering enough discarded sucrose for the queen, Procurement Drone Delta-Theta-81171 woke up in a big pile of fluffy things that she some...
s3 in idea barrages
Why say “ghosts that train the new ghosts” when you can say “non corpus mentors”? Yogi catgirls are all like “Nyanmaste”. A parody of POTUSA’s “Peaches” about the Dr. Seuss story “Sn...
s1 in idea barrages
“Muskrat Love” slowed down 500% into a vaporwave song called “Muskrat Ambivalence”. I don’t know why vampires would turn frogs into vampire frogs, I just know the frogs would say “Bloodw...
aug 30 in idea barrages
Why say “sword fight” when you can say “staff meeting”? A date that involves lovemaking and mediocre quick-service TexMex food could be called “Chipotlaid”. Only with his death did I...
prompt: gold, title: all that glittered in misc. flash fiction
She thought she just had a type. Not a physical-type but a personality-type. Aloof but impulsive. Free-spirited on the surface but deeply-guarded on the inside. She always wanted to save people ...
aug 28 in idea barrages
You know, you could totally write a column about drawing called Inkonclusion. You could! It’s okay to write about robots, don’t let anyone tell you there’s just literary devices. Oka...
aug 26 in idea barrages
He named his penis “Scoville” as he considered it a unit of heat. Are the studios are killing physical media & crippling streaming, so we HAVE to buy their diminishing-returns remake...
aug 24 in idea barrages
All slang is instantly dead the moment a big business uses it in an ad. “They got hoes, they got hoes, in different area Lowes!” he sang to himself, proving he was just about to need a ...
aug 22 in idea barrages
A late Gen X poem: you took him to bed / because he played you “Crash” / you woke the next day / with one hell of a rash Why say “portable dip” when you can say “guacamobility”? If ...
prompt: couch, title: everyone else forgot in misc. flash fiction
In the beginning, the internet was a tool to see the parts of the world you couldn’t see from where you were sitting, behind a giant desktop tower with a 28.8-modem chirping at you as it fired u...
aug 20 in idea barrages
There’s only one archer in their entire cult and she wields The Compound Bow. Here’s another great name for an indie band: Mollusk Ringwald. A reimagining of the Demon Barber story i...
aug 18 in idea barrages
I think someone just muted me for saying the Mets pitching situation is bad and it’s not gonna be fixed by signing even more kinda-acceptable #4-#5 starters. Like, you don’t have to be delus...
aug 16 in idea barrages
Why say “flat bottom boys” when you can say “assless chaps”? I don’t call the Syracuse hockey rink “the Oncenter” not only because its real name is The Onondaga War Memorial but also bec...
prompt: sound, title: phase changes in misc. flash fiction
“No.” I admitted to her, without shame but without pride, either, “If I were that smooth, I’d have three of you.” I’m honest to a fault most of the time, admitting to my weakness and giving othe...
birthdaybarrage in idea barrages
I am, admittedly, still disappointed that Amazon delivery cannot deliver me an Amazon. You are thrifting for old video games. Something catches your eye. “Ooo, Wii U” you think. An intru...
aug 12 in idea barrages
Your childhood crushes from the films and television are now hocking placebic beauty creams on the home shopping conveyances. You are old now. Of course the Heartland is boring. Their st...
aug 10 in idea barrages
A yacht club but for use on people who think it’s cool to buy yachts. Facebook is spamming me with ads about being a surrogate mother. It’s kinda hilarious for me personally, as I haven’...
