littlefallsmets ⋅ 44

I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.

with enough repetition, your flaws become your style

@Cecconi140

Entries 5,048

Page 2 of 202

June 17, 2024

june 17 in idea barrages

If they wanna dip into Greco-Roman myth, Count Chocula and Frankenberry could always add a new monster cereal friend The Mintotaur. Game company: “we accidentally made the game too horny, we’...


Jesus Christ paid the price for telling people to be nice He was killed off by powerful men His current fans would all call friend would all call boss would all call “God” I’m sure old Chri...


June 15, 2024

june 15 in idea barrages

When you consider that the Proud Boys are basically just Early To Mid Twentieth Century German Historical Reenactors, it is pretty funny that none of them would know what schadenfreude is, let ...


The worst part about being functionally-immortal is watching people you loved age to death and places you cherished crumble to dust, sure. That sort of trauma never erases your humanity, soul or ...


June 13, 2024

june 13 in idea barrages

You would die if you tried to subsist solely on artificial sugars, all things being Equal. A parody of Stone Temple Pilot’s “Meatplow” about Ronald MacDonald, the Meatclown. A fusion of eve...


June 13, 2024

two cups of coffee in poetry

I’ve run outta vitamins and I’ve run outta weed and all the rest of the pills that some doctors prescribed can’t gimmie half of what I actually need two cups of coffee and a fistfu...


June 11, 2024

june 11 in idea barrages

Things that work in a stylized anime setting sometimes look too bizarre/surreal when using real humans in live-action adaptations. The energy of ONE PIECE just looks unsettling w/ real faces ac...


June 09, 2024

june 9 in idea barrages

No one has ever paid money to see a heckler, a referee, an owner or an entertainment executive. At least no one sane. I guess there’s weird cultists. But in general. Are there people who are ...


June 07, 2024

june 7 in idea barrages

Why say “country doctor” when you can say “farmacist”? My brain keeps on mashing up that “Tell Me More, Tell Me More” song from GREASE with “Achy Breaky Heart” as if my mind is trying to puni...


The mythological creature as tourism hook is hardly new, of course. Shysters have been selling crude plesiosaur carvings at Loch Ness in Scotland since the 500s, before the word “plesiosaur” was ...


June 05, 2024

june 5 in idea barrages

For those of your obsessed with age limits in American politics, as if that’s someone one of the more pressing problems, just be careful what you wish for, that absolute record-setting moron Vi...


June 03, 2024

june 3 in idea barrages

To this day, I still read “Cardi B” as “Car dib” when I first see it. Part of the difficulty of being a man in his early forties is that you’re shopping and there’s a 30 year old woman and he...


June 01, 2024

june 1 in idea barrages

In the right font, “Shrek” looks like “Sarek” and so if you’re looking to create a new nerdy mash-up meme, you could do a lot worse than fusing Shrek with Spock’s dad. Communion wafers are a ...


“Aged cheese, I can mostly handle,” Frank said, picking at a veggie omelet with a fork his hand made look comically under-sized, “anything with a lot of unconverted lactose, however?” Frank opene...


May 30, 2024

may 30 in idea barrages

A special detergent for washing blankets called “Oil of Duvet”. A medieval paladin Superman whose arch-nemesis is a bard named Lex Luthier. If only we could get the world to stop mistaking ...


May 28, 2024

may 28 in idea barrages

I’ve accepted I’ll never be able to play a game that requires more unique inputs than a Sega Genesis paddle provides. I had terrible hand-to-eye coordination even before I was old, now I’m also...


May 26, 2024

may 26 in idea barrages

I’m here to do two things, have sex and change the world, and I’m possessed of a frustratingly long refractory period. A comedy act called “Yakov Smirnov’s Grandson Jacob Smith” and you say t...


May 24, 2024

may 24 in idea barrages

Frankenstein performed the first team-building exercise and we all saw how that all turned out. I like to think that Liam Neeson does all these all these awful low-budget geezer-teaser direct...


May 24, 2024

annual perennial in poetry

(poetry contest entry for Dolgeville’s silver-anniversary of its violet festival) silver bells chime out the summer-time blooming across the ruddy-dusky skies as if Christmas bulbs strung up on h...


The sailor indeed said “Brandy, you’re a fine girl, what a good wife you would be… but my life, my love and my lady is the sea”. That much is entirely accurate, but you gotta understand, that’s a...


May 22, 2024

may 22 in idea barrages

Ben Grimm gets kicked out of the Baxter Building and has to move in with Peter Parker, but needs to figure out how to do this without revealing to the world that Parker is also Spider-Man and t...


May 20, 2024

may 20 in idea barrages

Are there stories about the Transylvania Colony in America, before it was divided between Kentucky and Tennessee, being the ACTUAL place vampires come from and they covered up their existence w...


May 19, 2024

may 18 in idea barrages

I choose to believe the famous Rochester David Bowie mugshot was due to a fight after calling some food somewhere “garbage” and that’s how the Rochester Garbage Plate was named, as Bowie deserv...


May 18, 2024

blessings in poetry

I hope you die I hope you die ugly I hope you die fat and ugly I hope you die fat and ugly and old I hope you die old I hope you die having accomplished so many things having touched so ...


May 17, 2024

john henry blues in poetry

a long time gone ago john henry was a man a long gone time ago he was a steel-driving man but now don’t misunderstand don’t let your senses leave he was ...


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