Entries 5,442

Page 112 of 218

1.) It’s too bad D&D already claimed the word because we could totally call baby teeth “tieflings”. 2.) Your story about a rat with a drinking problem whose friends come together to sign it u...

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1.) I am the fluorescent lights in the kitchen, the fluorescent lights in the kitchen are me, the more humid it is, the less well we work. 2.) I like to think that Puff Daddy was whistling at a u...

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1.) Your parody of “Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong” about bigamists will be a huge hit on BYU’s college radio station. 2.) Put helping people, just helping people, above tribalism, above economic tri...

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1.) Your movie about a zombie racing league started in Arizona after the zombie apocalypse is mostly controlled will be called DEAD HEAT. 2.) But if you’re a hipster warlock, you name your crow f...

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1.) A world beholden to folks who need to break, to burn, to tear things down to prove that they are special. Many of ‘em have good intentions, to entertain, to make things better, but in selfish...

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1.) Whenever I remember that “feminists” who are bigoted against trans people are called TERFs (trans-exclusionary feminists) I remember the old schlock film “TERF Nazis Must Die!” and imagine a ...

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1.) You think you gotta own all this stuff, you think you have to impress with all your stuff, no, you just gotta see it. All these people, all these wonders, you could see them all, hear it all,...

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Frank Yetti woke up late in the morning most days, there weren’t enough tourists walking down Hollywood Boulevard at ten to make the effort worth it, especially on a weekday, so he afforded himse...

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Atlas didn’t shrug, at least the times that Ms. Rand said he did. Atlas didn’t need to shrug from exhaustion or despair, anyway, Atlas was very rarely actually the one holding our earth up there ...

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1.) If an establishment Democrat won the primary, you vote for them in the general, to oppose Trump. If an outsider Democrat won the primary, you vote for them in the general, to oppose Trump. So...

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breaking what you own yourself can absolutely be punk rock only if the things you break were things from cheap or free and half-broken to begin with if they are in working order even that is...

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Still, even if I believed what Frank said, that there was a curse placed on what would eventually become Los Angeles, where you’ll see what you want to see unless you are insane, very high or unl...

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1.) Because you can never assume how someone identifies, I like to stick with the perhaps-outdated but gender-respectful plural “peeps”. Yeah, it’s from a time when “Bennifer” was still used unir...

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1.) If you’re going to do a musical version of KING KONG, at least have the decency to call it APE MISBEHAVIN’. 2.) (Funko Pops are nerd Beanie Babies.) 3.) Watched the news until I couldn’t take...

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Minnie Driver was six feet tall and on the set of “Good Will Hunting” Matt Damon had to stand atop three apple boxes just outside the camera’s frame, so he might appear taller than the female lea...

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Whenever “Gilligan’s Island” comes up in conversation, invariably we’ll get around to the idea that if the Professor was so brilliant, why wasn’t he able to build a raft and get back to Hawaii? A...

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There used to be a time when teevee stations would sign-off for the evening, one-thirty in the morning, after the late show, after Letterman or whatever. They’d run the National Anthem or a praye...

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1.) Hope is wonderful, hope is the belief that the good things can happen but doubt, doubt is also be the belief that the bad things can yet be disproven, dismantled, torn down. Hope and doubt ar...

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1.) A travel agency that specializes in political-activism tours called RADICAL DEPARTURES. 2.) An ad for an expectorant medicine that uses the New Radicals’ song “You Get What You Give” reworked...

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Love is not always a straight line. Sometimes it is, sometimes it’s love at first sight, you walk into high school, you see the person in the locker next to yours and bam, fifty years later, you ...

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1.) If you gathered enough hawk feathers, could you make a pillow filled with black hawk down? 2.) A variant on vaporwave where glam rock is slowed down and glitched out called “glum”. 3.) A film...

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1.) Evil isn’t even the worst problem, at least in a vacuum. The evil of the handful wouldn’t be able to get very far without the apathy of the many. Apathy is the enabler that makes whatever evi...

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there’s lead in the water madmen in the halls of power beggars in the streets outside those richmen’s fancy balls wars waged for their own sake with assurances the news is fake the roads...

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1.) A head canon where Sluggo’s birthname is Simon Ritchie, he will eventually grow up to be Sid Vicious and NANCY is all one long prequel to the history of The Sex Pistols. 2.) One word misuse t...

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everybody’s all like where’s Waldo, where’s Waldo why isn’t anyone ever asking how’s Waldo? how am I? you’re all looking for me but you’re all looking through me maybe that’s wh...

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