littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,475
Page 164 of 219
511 in idea barrages
1.) I’m just gonna name my ulcer “The Mets Middle Relievers”. 2.) Naming your child Hospital then grooming said child for military service is a long play on a joke but it is totally worth it. 3.)...
510 in idea barrages
1.) Going through the toy cut-out bins after Phantom Menace, he thought “Watto Watto everywhere but thank God no damn Binks”. 2.) “Tofurkey… has put me… off my lunch” is a good start to a John Le...
59 in idea barrages
1.) Eventually the multiplex had to fire the projectionist for blaming all his mistakes on others. 2.) If your whole group of friends intend to go to the gym for leg exercise, are those quad goal...
lincoln avenue address in poetry
I believe in the weird arts I believe in punk rock indie film bit parts I believe in burlesque secular street preachers I believe in mandolins accordions and...
58 in idea barrages
1.) “Nuthin’ But Darjeeling” would be the worst tea-based rap parody ever. 2.) Sometimes feel like Forrest Gump stumbling through history not through disability rather through neurosis & know...
57 in idea barrages
1.) Selling bread in India to benefit charity is totally naan-profit. 2.) A horse traveling back in time to give himself the idea to build a time machine is a stable time loop. 3.) A hipster preg...
cardiff giant in poetry
(okay, it’s more of a metal song than a poem but the idea of writing a metal song about the Cardiff Giant hoax in the 1800s tickled my fancy so, ah, there we are) will the man who’s made of stone...
56 in idea barrages
1.) Eventually deconstruction was hollowed out, lost the mission to learn why, became a way to repackage the same old crap while feeling clever. 2.) I want to paint Ollie’s Serestro flea collar y...
panic attack haiku in poetry
reverse of reserves a reserve of reverses past empty, worsens
not quite a thousand words in poetry
in the universe where you went back in time you tried to prevent World War Two by propping up Hitler’s art career he supplanted Bob Ross on the Joy of Painting some other messed-up ...
five into seventy-two in poetry
the deer on Route Five are trying to give their lives to take out our cars late at night as a political or religious statement at this point fucking deer ...
independence day in poetry
after we invade countries after we raze cities burn their farms and commandeer their wells start putting in Cinnabons Starbucks and Shells when they start getting our summer ...
this is not a finished poem in poetry
wisdom is realizing you’re never going to be wise all of the time no matter how much experience you’ve got up your sleeve revise revise revise Einstein close to the nature of...
cinqo de barrago in idea barrages
1.) On the off-chance you write a scientific paper on insect die-offs, entitling it “Plight of the Bumblebee” is your civic duty. 2.) I somehow accidentally clicked the button on facebook that ch...
54 in idea barrages
1.) I sure hope that if there’s a booze stand at the ren faire, they call it The Flagon Wagon. 2.) In my particular cultural niche a “Power of Love”/Nintendo Power Glove parody would work but alm...
53 in idea barrages
1.) I am opposed to the death penalty but for whomever decided to start calling appetizers “apps” I am willing to be flexible. 2.) After we invade countries, when they start getting our movies wh...
52 in idea barrages
1.) You can train your bird to sing a Fresh Prince song but that doesn’t mean he gets the meaning. Parrots just don’t understand. 2.) Your vegan death metal band will be called Despairagus. 3.) C...
radio free will in poetry
oh baby oh darling I’ve held my commission despite indecision despite all the derision I’ve held my commission despite all the times it has meant my omission despite all the dissin’ the jam...
may day barrage in idea barrages
1.) He claims to have aced the test on Scottish history but his friend retorted “Picts or it didn’t happen”. 2.) We are too old to be prodigies but, hell, being Cool Uncles to the next wave of pr...
430 in idea barrages
1.) Convince someone that 420 is a reference to “A Song of Six Pence” because it involves 4 and 20 of something baked. 2.) Sadly, all “Snoke On The Water” parodies must wait until the next Star W...
429 in idea barrages
1.) We couldn’t be sure because the thick gloves but she at least had supposeable thumbs. 2.) When someone smugly refers to their self as a “locovore”, yell “YOU EAT TRAINS?” as loudly as you can...
as we go along in poetry
had the power socket gone up in flames at three in the morning not five in the afternoon I would be dead right now suffocated along with my family and their pets we would have all been dea...
428 in idea barrages
1.) Nothing “stars” Eric Roberts. Oh, there are things where Eric Roberts is in a lead or leading role but nothing STARS him. 2.) Trump is the Pabst Blue Ribbon of politics: cheap, terrible, ubiq...
giving thanks in poetry
If jocks thank God when they win, they should blame Satan when they lose. “That interception I threw, I blame The Devil.” “The opposing point guard sold his soul to the King of L...
427 in idea barrages
1.) Nothing like a marathon nightmare about watching time travelers try to prevent World War Two, changing nothing in the broad strokes of the outcome but remixing the smaller details then their ...
