littlefallsmets ⋅ 45 ⋅

I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.

with enough repetition, your flaws become your style

@Cecconi140

Entries 5,239

Page 1 of 210

1 day ago

m12 in idea barrages

COBRA’s Weather Dominator implies the existence of G.I. JOE’s Weather Submissive. She loved Kermit so much, when he was in physical need, even if she had the worst headache in the world,...


3 days ago

m10 in idea barrages

You could easily start calling Easter “Furry Halloween”. It’d be funny! The problem is, you might give them the idea to take the idea seriously. The problem with good satire is it’s so close...


The knife is still in you. Metaphorically, the knife is still in your side, it has been for years and decades now. You have gotten used to it. To the extent that one can heal with a blade lodged...


5 days ago

m8 in idea barrages

A next-gen video game about THE FACTS OF LIFE could involve a 3-D Tootie. The most scientifically perfect strap-on and it’s called The Bigs-Hoseon. All you need for an “angry” review...


7 days ago

m6 in idea barrages

Shittin’ in the mornin’ sun / I’ll be shittin’ when the evenin’ comes / Watching the shits roll in / Then I watch ‘em roll away again, yeah / I’m shittin’ on the dock of the bay / Watchin’ t...


May 03, 2025

m4 in idea barrages

Both extremes of I.P. discourse kill culture as we know it & no one wants solutions that actually work. If you let pseudo-AI run rampant, no one makes anything new simple there’s no cash...


May 03, 2025

m2 in idea barrages

They’ve had so many tie-ins at McDonalds over the years but we’ve never gotten the “Egg McMuppet” and that’s just a shame. The Sausage Egg McMuppet could be MADE out of the pig woman! No...


So, do you want your good news or bad news first? Of course, you’ll want the good news first. You always want the good news first. You always think that the good news will give you paths toward ...


April 29, 2025

a30 in idea barrages

Wendy’s had the lock on “eating barely-acceptable chili in a solarium” market and they just threw it away. When you have a segment cornered, you gotta hold onto it for dear life, but no. The...


April 28, 2025

a28 in idea barrages

There is something deeply unnerving about the idea of being treated in a hospital named after a chain of casinos. Like, you’re just cosmically asking for it. If you look north and sudden...


April 28, 2025

folksong in poetry

well I’d rather be ugly than tired and I’d rather be smart than be rich and I’d rather just scrape by while having some fun than be some old billionaire’s bitch well I’d rather be ugly tha...


April 26, 2025

a26 in idea barrages

If you want to be accepted as a tree hugger, you need to immerse yourself in poplar culture. If Kenny Loggins last word aren’t “im.. all right… don’t nobody… worry bout me…” he will have...


I’ve been trying to grow my fingernails out again, for what feels like the ten-thousandth time in my forty-something decades on this rock, and I’m certain that I’m going to fail once again but I...


April 23, 2025

a24 in idea barrages

One-hundred years of Disney, built on the exploitation of the business unsaavy Ub Iwerks, who did most of the work while Walt took the money and the credit. If Steamboat Willie goes back to ...


April 21, 2025

a22 in idea barrages

No orgy’s feast is complete without at least one braisin’ strumpet. A Dire Straits parody about Bart Simpson, David and Dennis the Menace called “Sultans of Sling”. A card game of ta...


April 20, 2025

easter barrage in idea barrages

Imprisoned for his many serious crimes, Paul Blart tries to escape his prison by evading the warden Paul Rudd, who turns out to act for the money but his real passion is prison wardening and...


April 20, 2025

a20 in idea barrages

Batman can create fresh soup with a single word via the power of the butlerguy effect. A soundbath but only of Goofy’s sub-linguistic utterances. No words but lots of Goofy’s sounds. ...


April 17, 2025

a18 in idea barrages

I mean, one good thing we can say about the changing of years is that every passing year involves less checks written with the wrong year because personal checks are slowly disappearing. ...


April 15, 2025

a16 in idea barrages

In Emo Mario Brothers, Mario jumps on Gloombas. The merger of the XFL and USFL needs to go into anti-trust court as they are creating a monopoly on “names for football teams that sound l...


April 14, 2025

a14 in idea barrages

Bad boys, good guys, I’m the slightly-mischievous man. If I’m quiet, I’m either actually comfortable or I’m dead. If you showed someone from before COVID all the pictures on social ...


April 12, 2025

a12 in idea barrages

A marijuana product review show called “Highly Recommended”. In hell, the only thing you can eat is Tarnation Instant Breakfast. A firework that shoots noodles cooked by the flames c...


April 10, 2025

a10 in idea barrages

It is weird to think of, but there must have been some first person to make a pickle, even if there were many “inventions” of them in different cultures. It feels like they always existed...


I’ve written before on the topic of my favorite curse word, ‘goddamned’. The way that its treated as a milder curse, a PG-13 cuss, yet is a way of saying ‘I want the Thing in charge of every-thi...


April 08, 2025

a8 in idea barrages

The life of a cattle neuterer is difficult. It’s hard living on a fixed income. “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take” is true but “You humiliate yourself on 100% of the shots you m...


April 06, 2025

a6 in idea barrages

If you replaced every “Forget About It” in the Matchbox 20 song “Smooth” with a bad Mafia stereotype “FUGGEDABOWDIT”, there would finally be one interesting thing about the Matchbox 20 song ...


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