littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,440
Page 174 of 218
14 in idea barrages
1.) Believe in anything you can’t prove too much and pretty soon, you’re a hammer & everything that disagrees is a nail. Don’t believe too much. 2.) Barney from the Flintstones’ reckless yout...
life between war-times in poetry
if you wait at the ever-ready for a crisis with every single breath I guess you’ll get one eventually you’ll also have ruined your life while you girded up against dea...
they salted the roads to hell and back yesterday to collect New Years holiday double-time pay if you roll a pretzel on the New York Thruway you could bring it up ful...
13 in idea barrages
1.) Online frustration leads to furrowed browsers. 2.) If only Roddy Piper was still alive, I could tell him to rap under the name “Ghostface Kilter”. It would’a been rad. 3.) Sometimes you gotta...
12 in idea barrages
1.) Happy New Year. This year I’mma try to stop holding myself back so much, let myself go for the good stuff instead of sitting around in doubt. That’s my resolution thing and I hope it works. I...
Most professional training begins with an entrance exam but for an OB-Gyn, it ends with one. Yet the path to being a toll booth operator begins with an exit interview. The E...
11 in idea barrages
1.) Law and Order: Special Victuals Unit would only investigate food crimes. Guy Fieri would be like the Kingpin. 2.) In 2016, I’ll stop expecting someone or something other than myself to save m...
the x-factor in poetry
the difference between the exceptional and the plain old exceptions is subtle and will be at best born out over time if at all so take these socially-constructed false dichotomies...
make America great for once in poetry
The nine scariest words in the English language are “I’m from a corporation and I’m here to help” to use the language of the enemy. Let’s shrink the power of corporate America so sma...
1231 in idea barrages
1.) Jokey Smurf is suspected of the terrorist bombing of Papa Smurf with an improvised celebratory device. Mr. Smurf remains at tiny. 2.) Star Wars The Force Awakens except with 90s alt-rocker Po...
1230 in idea barrages
1.) If the theme of your prom is anti-hipster, pin flowers made out of bread to your dates, call them Gluteneers. 2.) I’m just a “Mystery Science Theatre 3000 and Chill” man in a “Netflix and Chi...
panic attack progression in poetry
I will not be ruled by fear. When I am I’m one-tenth of myself. I’ll be ruled by joy even if there are those who’d get more joy of their own from my fear. And I deserve better t...
1229 in idea barrages
1.) If a Stormtrooper landed on a bed of peanut noodles, it’d be a Pad Thai TIE pad. 2.) If the warm-up to your set is someone shooting ping-pong balls out of their ass or vadge, that’s an openin...
the tall girl in poetry
introduce me to the tall girls give my number to the tall girls make me sound awesome to the tall girls I’m too cowardly to do it myself I’ve never dated the tall girls sometimes I’m too ...
1228 in idea barrages
1.) The difference between the exceptional and the plain ol’ exceptions is subtle and will be at best born out over time, if at all. 2.) Dear England, please stop pretending to pronounce “Zebra” ...
ode to an imaginary facebook profile in poetry
Perrin or Baden or Umlat or Tetiham or whatever the hell your name is I’m sorry if you actually were real I know you weren’t actually real but I am a recovering Catholic you see I ha...
1227 in idea barrages
1.) Open up a pro-wrestling themed restaurant called Grapplebees. 2.) Dog knocked over the tree. Isn’t it supposed to be the cats that do that? 3.) Put creative effort into decorating your front ...
barroxing day in idea barrages
1.) Merry Holiday, friends. It’s been a weird rough 2015. Thanks for enduring my gag writing practice here, in some other life I’m on a writing staff on a hit show and it keeps bleeding into this...
merry barragemas in idea barrages
1.) Rudolph and Frosty each get a vote in the yearly Hip-Hop Awards because they’re both Rankin-Bass. 2.) Refer to Presbyterians as “prezbos”. For example, “oh that Suzie Johnson, I hear she’s a ...
barragemas eve in idea barrages
1.) Ahab aimed at its mouth with a gun, he fought the maw and the maw won, he fought the maw and the maw won… 2.) Nightmare about the interplay of creation & entropy analogized thru an infini...
1223 in idea barrages
1.) Turns out Razzles are neither candy NOR gum. Razzles are a legume. 2.) Having your disputes settled by ents is binding arbortration. 3.) When I’m a pin-up model for my barrel-chested lumberja...
skellig michael, ireland in poetry
on a little island driven there by shame and failure ten million burning suns from nowhere beautiful but empty ruins whose purpose no one can remember desolate and lonely so blue and so ...
1222 in idea barrages
1.) The Santa slash-fic you write will be called “Big Man On Krampus”. 2.) Don’t get too married to your own ideas, that’s how they get inbred. 3.) At the clinic they paged Timothy McVeigh over t...
I’ve never been to Wichita but I take it on faith that there is a Wichita why would anyone ever make up a Wichita? they only happen by accidental momentum things like Wichita. I’ve go...
1221 in idea barrages
1.) So afraid of living a balanced life, the cowardly ion. 2.) Those randos in your facebook requests who don’t know anyone you know, they’re time-traveling fans of yours, not scammers. 3.) Take ...
