littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,440
Page 152 of 218
1010 in idea barrages
1.) I mind the all-Christmas radio stations much less now that they mean pumpkin spice is going away for nine months. 2.) No, you can’t be neutral on a moving train but you also can’t pull an eme...
109 in idea barrages
1.) Of course those nuns fell in love, they were both conventionally attractive. 2.) It’d be easier to say Trump was just “joking crudely” if it wasn’t exactly the kind of sexual assault he’s bee...
108 in idea barrages
1.) Cage goes in the Twitter, you go in the Twitter. Snark’s in the Twitter. Our snark. 2.) Assbro would be a great name for a sex toys company. 3.) The upside to TV dying as a medium is that I’m...
107 in idea barrages
1.) Rural Southerners into ironic 80s nostalgia are known as “radnecks”. 2.) Your new-age goth band will be called “Flock of Sea-Ghouls”. 3.) And on the pedestal these words appear: Never gonna g...
the halloween pledge in poetry
The Halloween Pledge: I will not slut-shame or size-shame anybody’s costumes but I will absolutely stupid-shame where and whenever appropriate. I will not tell you that your Harley Quinn g...
“Consider the lilies in the field,” they will say leading up to election day “they do not toil, the freeloading bastards they are pirating water and soil that is far better used by corporat...
106 in idea barrages
1.) The ignorant and the hateful, they’re just at Kamp Krusty with Trump as their distant myth to bring them food & water & smite their enemies. Their lives are crap but they wanna blame ...
105 in idea barrages
1.) Whenever I read “self-heating meal” I first think it says “self-hating meal” and I imagine a world where that happens. 2.) The thing about fishing is there’s a sucker born every minute. 3.) T...
104 in idea barrages
1.) My superpower is my left shoulder hurts whenever Donald Trump is saying or typing something stupid. That or my superpower is a torn rotator cuff. 2.) All the love of a “good” woman does is ha...
minimal barrage in idea barrages
1.) Making a facebook event for a psychic fair seems like a cheat, yeah? Everyone should just KNOW and show up. 2.) I broke the record for sounding like a broken record regarding my broken record...
alphabet soup in poetry
I try my best to be a straight ally to my friends who are gay or trans or bi or in every other way do not fit the old sexual and gender binaries that are oppressive to even straight cis peop...
Of course your web browser has an inferiority complex, YOU’RE ALWAYS MINIMIZING IT. You’re always keeping tabs on it. You’re always erasing its history. You’re always making it go backwa...
please hold in poetry
whenever they say “please hold” during the course of telephony I like to pretend they mean that they’re very lonely as if they’re saying as if they’re begging “please hold me” it’s too ...
102 in idea barrages
1.) When you manage an all-elderly Cramps cover band you will call them The Gramps. 2.) Can the news start calling drug smugglers “drugglers”? I’d smile every time an anchor said “drugglers”. 3.)...
october starter barrage in idea barrages
1.) Nearly everything that facebook ads declare “unbelievable” are actually imminently believable. Except some of the religious ones, I s’pose. 2.) Do I call everyone “sir” and “maam” because I’m...
The rights allowed prisoners are the baseline of the rights you will have as citizens in a time of fresh crisis. Attica. Attica. Everything you let them routinely strip way from a w...
Writer’s block is really only a problem if you don’t let yourself write crap like this. Stuff that is banal and borderline obvious. Get it out of your system and then move on....
fictional addictions in poetry
Vilifying the Hamburglar that’s blaming the victim don’t put him in a jail just yet get the man some clean burger wrappers get the man into a twelve-step Ronald, you know the levels of s...
no sane reason in poetry
Do not blame people for being mad that the police are killing people for no sane reason. Be mad that the police are killing people for no sane reason. Anger is a rational reaction ...
september capstone barrage in idea barrages
1.) If only Prince Charles had a lower-back tattoo that we might call it a Wales Tale. 2.) A parody of “Black Velvet” about Darth Vader, “Black Helmet”? 3.) Worry’s inevitable. When worry over th...
929 in idea barrages
1.) In Soviet Russia, Man-Elephant is not a human being, he is an animal. 2.) The “Marvel Zombies” comics did not take enough advantage of the fact that they had a character who was legitimately ...
there’ll be adamant balladry piercing old formations of what it was to be gallant that’s no longer guarding what was once was avant when the revolutions coagulate when the clouds of ...
928 in idea barrages
1.) Their anti-dungeons-and-dragons laws were, perhaps aptly, draconian. 2.) Whenever someone says “please hold” on the phone, I like to pretend they mean they’re very very lonely. 3.) Before you...
927 in idea barrages
1.) Frost Giant Advisory tonight. If your vikings are not prepared to battle frost giants tonight, please, get them indoors. 2.) Less a melancholy baby, more a melancholy maybe and yet melancholy...
926 in idea barrages
1.) I propose that we start calling the taint “the Grinch”. I think it would soon make the winter holidays a much more fun time. 2.) Trump publicity releases, just off the presses, get ‘em while ...
