KissOfLife! ⋅ 41 ⋅

Brisbane, Queensland, Australia. Ex country kid, on the outskirts of Outback. 6'3, gay, introvert, spontaneous Sagittarius (Orpheus actually). I need an outlet for my life, and this is it :) If you'd like to be added to Friends Only, a) don't be a prude, and b) please let me know :) Insta : pfefz Snap: luvncraze Facebook: Matt Pfeffer

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I'm very tired today.  I think I was mentally exhausted yesterday and crashed out from a nap, which resulted in me awaking at 11pm, and it's now 6:15pm the next day.  I was at the gym wondering...


The funeral was as wonderful as I expected it to be.  I didn't know how I was going to go today, but I was the third child of four doing the eulogy, and I managed to talk my way through it, in ...


The funeral is this Saturday.   Monday was a tough day, as expected.  We went to the meeting at the funeral home and it probably took an hour and a half or so.  Just a lot of paperwork when so...


November 24, 2024

Journalling to cope in Vulnerability

Thankyou to everyone whom took the time to send your sympathy for me about my dad's passing.  It's certainly been a tough 48 hours, and I can't believe how much has happened in such a short amou...


November 22, 2024

Rest in peace, dad in Vulnerability

Dad passed tonight at 9:27pm. It seemed very peaceful.  His breathing just slowed and eventually he took his last breath.  We all told him we loved him and that it was okay to let go, and I sai...


"Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep.  If I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.  Amen." This was the prayer I was taught as a kid to pray before bed ever...


November 18, 2024

Go in peace in Vulnerability

I will be glad when this stops dragging out tbh.   Dad is at least back in Pittsworth, where he wants to pass.  It may not be at home exactly, but he needs to be where he can get the support he...


November 11, 2024

Update on dad in Adventures in paradise

So I definitely have to stay until Friday at my parents place.  I don't want to, but I will.  I promised my mum I'd be here for her, so that's what I'm doing.  My mum's a mess, and she hates bei...


November 04, 2024

Taiwan part 2 in Adventures in paradise

I can say I've experienced my first typhoon.  It wasn't anything to worry about in the end, but the anticipation was pretty scary.  I was comforted by the fact that Taipei is surrounded by m...


I made it to Taipei.  I've been here... five days now?  Yeah that sounds about right, and it's been lovely.  The people have been lovely and mostly keep to themselves, despite being such a bust...


I feel like I should have a spell-book or my own witches cauldron with the amount of shit I'm consuming to try and help myself lol.  The spellbook can be my library of self-help books and the ...


So, with the apartment we are renting being sold, and the seller wanting to drag prospective buyers through, my housemate and I are considering getting our respective sex-toys and laying them...


September 24, 2024

Family BBQ in Adventures in paradise

The disassociation/derealisation is real today. Probably the absolute worst symptom of the anxiety, in my opinion. Thoughts I can deal with, eventually, but this shit makes me feel like I’m no...


August 23, 2024

Sweet dreams in Vulnerability

Well it’s been a rough few days, notably a few days ago when the horrid thoughts were there. This happened the same night as earlier in the day I’d had the paramedics at work looking me over whe...


So things are bleak. After I wrote that last entry, my mum rang me. That was a tough conversation, especially when I heard my mum break down over the phone. The doctor has officially given my dad...


I had a phone call from my mother right after I wrote that last entry. Things aren’t good. She’s called a family meeting in Toowoomba for next week to discuss what to do with my dad. She broke...


July 27, 2024

Close call in Vulnerability

I’m watching the opening ceremony for the Paris Olympic Games at the moment. It’s the replay, as I wasn’t getting up at 2:30am to watch it live. It’s actually pretty cool, despite the rain. I ...


July 16, 2024

Real or unreal? in Political shit

Again, just the opinion of an outsider Aussie here. I wonder how I’d feel if I were American, but I think most of the people I read here are, so it’s cool seeing different views. I don’t actual...


Craaaaaazy! I turned the TV on this morning when it was breaking news that Trump had been shot, although they were reporting it as though he hadn’t been hit and he just just ducked when the shots...


I’ve actually been doing a bit of socializing, which has been so unlike me lately, But it’s what I need to do to kick this anxiety-bitch off it’s perch. It seems to be treating me good. I feel...


June 22, 2024

Coughy McCoughCough in Stuff

I’m still feeling like shit. I keep mentally telling myself that I need to take leave every Winter because I sure as hell hate the cold. So many of my friends love it, but not for me. Everyone ...


June 19, 2024

Grotty in Stuff

I’ve picked up a nasty little bug from somewhere. So annoying. Very phlegmy. Gross. The cough is the worst part. Naturally, me being worrier-me, I took one of my tests right away. No lines ...


The bitch is back. Somehow, I went to work today. It wasn’t an easy decision, by any means. I could have called in sick, but I didn’t. The policy is to work if we don’t have bad symptoms. Min...


June 01, 2024

Orange jumpsuit in Stuff

Well, at the moment, it looks like I’ll be going into work tomorrow, with Covid. I texted my ASM to ask what the policy is and he confirmed what I thought it was - as long as asymptomatic and no...


May 24, 2024

Back from the doc in Stuff

I’m back from the doctor! I managed to squeeze in an appointment and got back just in time for the lighting guy, who was a half-hour early. Anyway, it was all a bit confusing. Even the form he ...


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