Entries 448
Page 6 of 18
4/22
If/when I am ever in another long-term relationship, I refuse to be in charge of regulating another adult’s emotions. It seems this responsibility is assigned to people when they enter a relation...
I need you, after all.
I thought I was done here but it turns out that I need a release for all of the thoughts indefinitely swirling in my head and I have no other outlet yet. I need this place, after all. I am having...
4/12
I am so very tired. Both kids have had stomach virus stuff on and off since Easter. I hope that after today, it doesn’t come back. They’re both better today. I’m going a bit stir crazy since I h...
well, *photo edit*
I finally got glasses. And the best part is, I can actually see things! The worst part is the damn cost. Oh well, MY EYES. I look much older: eeeeep.
4/3
I feel like a failure in every possible way and it really sucks.
kid entry
Lorelei has hit full toddler mode. It was only a matter of time. After all, she’s getting close to being two. She thinks everything is hers, and runs up to people yelling “no, no!” when someone h...
3/23
It feels like I haven’t written in ages, but I don’t really have anything to say. My children are growing up too quickly, as usual. I’m getting older too quickly, as usual. My eyes have been bugg...
nutshell
Sometimes I can keep it at arm’s length. Like a ghost, it follows me everywhere, a grey cloud that fills me. Sometimes I let it overtake me, and I wallow in it. It feels so good, good familiar. T...
26
Life is an interesting thing. The Earth made its way around the sun 26 times in my current life. Huzzah! I was born today. If none of that made sense. :)
I'll be your super queen
Whoever thought that I would be mopping my kitchen floor to the song “stumbleine” and be completely content with life. Despite everything. Despite the memories that I have acquired. This is my...
2/22
I am very fortunate. Today was hard. I haven’t had any childcare recently (the babysitter is still being really flaky, but she also had pneumonia and was in the hospital… so I can forgive it). I ...
2/14
Things are looking up. The sun is out. The weather is getting warmer. That’s enough on its own. Today is Valentine’s Day and I had a dance party with my kids. Jacob and I had a date last night ...
2/11
I am feeling very unsure of myself and my confidence has been wavering. Whenever I feel like this, I just fall into old habits. I am worth every breath I take on this planet. I have to tell mysel...
The Summer Day
Who made the world? Who made the swan, and the black bear? Who made the grasshopper? This grasshopper, I mean- the one who has flung herself out of the grass, the one who is eating sugar out of m...
2/7
Life hasn’t been too kind. Two days after Jacob and I decided to separate, I found out I was pregnant. Now I’m miscarrying. After I got home from that terrible ordeal, I dropped my phone. The scr...
Fate doesn't exist,
but if it did, it just wants to make me its plaything. I can’t explain. I don’t want to. I’m frayed. Later, maybe. I’m okay, I promise.
1/19
We are separated. I probably won’t come here for awhile.
1/16
Sometimes I wish that I could just be more normal. The kind of person who drinks wine and does those complicated coloring books after her kids go to bed. The kind of person who reads magazines an...
1/14
I keep coming here to write, but life gets in the way. I just feel very tired. I can’t seem to get enough sleep. I’ve been a bit sad, but I don’t want to disclose why in this entry. I didn’t wi...
because I have a vagina
I have been thinking about my experiences throughout life being a girl/woman and sometimes things just don’t register until one is really thinking about them. I have been followed a few times whi...
Side note
One thing I have learned about myself is that I’m still attractive to other people, even if I have had children. I don’t have to be 100 lbs and have a perfect body for people to think I’m attract...
the shower phenomenon
I was listening to a song yesterday in the shower, and I started writing a story in my head that was based on it. When I turned the water off, I lost all of it. I know it happens to almost everyo...
1/1
We saw Star Wars again yesterday. It was an excellent movie when I was able to watch it without any expectations. The first time I thought it was just “okay.” Last night was just a normal night....
Please stop making fun of Kylo Ren.
I see a meme today on Facebook that says: who is your favorite Disney princess? And the last photo is of Kylo Ren. Why must you all be so blatantly heteronormative? Okay, not all of you. But a go...
12/23
Everything is going to be okay, I know it.
