Manorexic (he/then) ⋅ 40 ⋅
Manorexia - I have a dating disorder
A comfort zone is a beautiful place but nothing ever grows there
Entries 1,679
Page 2 of 68
Unwritten in Current Events
I feel like I’m starting a new chapter in my life, but I have writer’s block. I’m caught between two identities. The story I’ve been living is beginning to crumble. I’ve lost the plot. The lin...
I Was Wrong in Current Events
In my previous entry, I stated that English does not have the requisite words to encapsulate how miserable I was yesterday. English does have the requisite words. One word sums it all up. . . . ...
Pity Party For One in Current Events
Yesterday was long and full of terrors English does not have the requisite words to encapsulate how miserable I was yesterday. I had a horrible sleep, so I knew it was going to be bad, but I di...
Redrum in Current Events
All work and no play makes TL a dull boy Woke up mid dream, and now I can’t fall back asleep. I dreamt I was filling in a funder about everything going on at work. There is nothing new to ponde...
Jet2Holiday in Current Events
Nothing beats a Jet2Holiday It’s so hilarious. My coordinator thought he was escaping my program, but they gave him the other one, making him a coordinator of two programs. His problems just co...
Good Riddance? in Current Events
We are moving our office at the end of the month. I spent my last two shifts packing up my program. It is 80% done. My coordinator played with his guitar for those two days. We have an annual ...
Trauma Lullabies in Current Events
Ever wake up blissed out? I took a little bit of time off from work so I could look at my situation from a safe space. Thursday was my first day back at the office. I was feeling so low. I was ...
Space in Current Events
I forced myself to be productive yesterday. I avoided the doom scrolling. Today, I am feeling upset, but I have reasons to be so; I am creating space for it. This wasn’t on my agenda, but what c...
Reflect Deflect Inflect in Current Events
Vinidictiveness and spite are old friends of mine Anger is where I am in my grieving process. Denial, sadness, and bargaining, I’ve already burned through. We’ll see how I channel this one. Gri...
Betrayed in Current Events
The last several weeks were long and full of terrors. Virginia, a coordinator of a different program, walked out and quit. She was in a meeting with HR and her managers. The meeting was going ...
Words Are Just Breath in Current Events
I feel like I need to write, but I don’t know what to write. Still going through the motions. It was nice to see my boys at work. I said that I wouldn’t like the decisions my coordinator would...
FOBI in Current Events
Alright, so our Youth Manager told me that there is a coordinator position opening up soon for a youth program that has a different age bracket than mine, but he couldn’t tell me more than that....
Sad Face in Current Events
Yesterday, near the end of the afternoon, I started to feel very sad. Heartbroken, even. I was playing a song from my brother’s playlist, and I started to really miss him and my nephews. It took...
Locked and Unloaded in Current Events
I waited all summer for today. I’m back to my regular shifts at work, which gives me a lot of space from my roommate. Today, I am finally completely free of her. I was in ADHD wait mode, countin...
Trippin in Current Events
BC is beautiful. I got back from my holiday in BC yesterday. Campbell River took my breath away. So did Tofino and Long Beach. My brother drove me all over the island. Potholes, waterfalls, an...
Oops... I Did It Again in Current Events
Our Youth Manager just told me that my position will likely be changing soon. I am not being utilized properly with my talents. He told me this after I flagged something in my team. Not to be a...
Next Stage in Current Events
My heart feels heavy today. I was aiming to do a community walk, but I was feeling a little down on my way to work. I am not desensitized to what I witness when I do those walks. I feel grief-...
Car Bomb in Current Events
Woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of my neighbour screaming my name outside my window. Thomas wake up! I heard her say something about a fire. She saw my light turn on. Wake up Ton...
More Glimmers in Current Events
“In Canada, Indigenous boys involved with the justice system are 5 to 7 times more likely to die by suicide. They are 7 times more likely to be victims of homicide. They are overrepresented in o...
Glimmers in Current Events
I dreamt I was back at my old job. I always wake up feeling hopeless. I did like the gig. I miss the people, but I was there for 3 years and never got a full-time position. I think I have some t...
Workshop of Horrors in Current Events
The workshop is over. I feel so much relief. I left with a fan base, again. The kookums, they’re my stans now. They saved the heavy part for last. What to do when a participant dies. I’m not t...
Going Through The Motions in Current Events
Yesterday, we dropped off some meals for Jimmy’s family (the participant in my program who passed away.) His mother doesn’t know what happened either. His grandmother found him Wednesday morning...
Under Destruction in Current Events
I would burn it all down if I could. I was very pointed in my texts with my coordinator yesterday. It’s been a year of carrying everything. Thinking of everything. Doing everything. Coordinati...
Rage Stage in Current Events
I don’t trust my actions right now. Let alone my feelings. I know I am grieving, so I don’t know where anything is coming from, really. For example, this case I am building against my workplace,...
Drift in Current Events
My nervous system is thawing. I can feel what I am feeling. Jimmy keeps crossing my mind. It is only natural. I worked up the nerve to scroll through my phone and look at pictures and recordin...
