Alice, Falling
Entries 37
Page 2 of 2
I’m starting to think that I’ve been in the very dull, subtle depression for a while. There are things that make me happy, for sure, and I’m never sad. I just feel dull, and drained of energy, an...
Coco Louis Vuitton Prada in On loves.
So, I have a boyfriend. With the exception of Jason, with whom I lasted 2 months back in 2013, I haven’t been in an actual, defined relationship since 2009 (and that was with Chris, who too laste...
“He and I were in Target with my girl friend,” I say to my therapist, “and I was trying to help her pick out a body pillow when I said to him, ‘Um. Why is my entire ear in your mouth?’” Next wee...
Of dead and dying in On loves.
On a dead friendship (from an essay I’ve been working on about me and ex-BFF): We’d been so lonely for so long that we decided we were going to be best friends before even meeting in person. She ...
There have been many riveting moments in our non-relationship, and I’ve been hesitant to acknowledge them - whether in writing or indulging in letting them roll around in my brain - for fear that...
I told him this story weeks ago, standing in his kitchen with his friend, tipsy off spiced Malibu rum and apple juice: (I’ve told it before here, too.) My brother dropped a feeder mouse into his ...
Are takebacks allowed? in On loves.
So I might be a little bit of an idiot. That guy I’ve been seeing? The one I’m pretty much (ok, it’s a little more than “pretty much”) in love with is not quite so in love with me. Or at least no...
My bedroom is full of ants. Tiny ants that I thought were sugar ants, only they don’t eat the poison-laced honey I leave for them. Just now, I flicked one off my keyboard. I’ll wake up at 11 on a...
It happened gradually and then all of the sudden. “I’m trying to decide if I should buy more plastic surgery or freeze my eggs.” I play it off as a joke (“You’re such a weirdo,” he says to me.),...
I believe in dialogues, not monologues. in On loves.
Twenty minutes after sending that text (see previous entry), he calls me. I don't answer. Shortly after I receive the following text: "I can't sleep knowing how badly this upset you. I think if ...
Dont Make Me Rape You in On loves.
A text I sent tonight after my 4th date with the CEO whose TedTalks I helped edit. Didn't see this one coming: "I don't sleep with someone until I feel ready. I don't want to be a tease, nor do ...
Diplomatic exchanges. in On loves.
I dated this guy for two months and during that time experienced the best food and worst sex of my life. I felt like we were fizzling, but he confirmed it by dropping me off at my car one lazy Su...
