littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,471
Page 39 of 219
july 29 in idea barrages
Why call it “armed robbery” when we could call it a “harmburglar”? Your band is now named IMPERSONAL PAN PIZZA. Here we are, on the internet, where having all the collected knowledge of the...
july 27 in idea barrages
Why call it “public domain” when you could call it “I.P. freely”? Once again, I won the Boilermaker by sleeping in until 1PM in an air conditioned bedroom twenty-some-odd miles away. I’m real...
july 25 in idea barrages
The narrator is a version of myself / the narrator is aversion of myself. Apple cobbler JEANS, boots by a COBBLER. I mean, maybe that’s the thing, right? If I’m fated to be a courier, an ov...
july 23 in idea barrages
OSMOSIS JONES except the germs keep killing Bill Murray and resurrecting him over and over again to win a bet with the devil and it’s called OSMOSIS JOB. And then, sometimes, you just wanna w...
july 21 in idea barrages
The Navii from Avatar are just really really horny Gungans. I’ll be taking no further questions. Conan the Barbarian rapping “Don’t call it a Crom-back, I’m no good at prayers”. Your wild m...
july 19 in idea barrages
If you misremember the Simpsons and think Kearney said “Nuke The Whales”, is that a Nelson Mandela effect? You can say “well, I’ll just move to Canada” all you like but if all the sane people...
july 17 in idea barrages
In the next season of Futurama, because of the lag between animation writing and animation output, will we get a by-then outdated Morbo The News Monster “It’s Morbo Time” joke? Anyone who doe...
july 15 in idea barrages
Why call them “bridesmaids” when you can say “insane gown posse”? A Smashing Pumpkins candy tie-in called Reese’s Pieces Iscariot. I just think Eminem should sell a knife called “Mom’s Mac...
july 13 in idea barrages
The whole continuity of the Mario Brothers makes a lot more sense if all the Donkey Kong games are Wario posing as Mario to frame him for being a jerk to monkeys. Only years and years later d...
your morning reminder in poetry
this is the life you get hunting for socks and belts when you don’t even want to be awake but you still have to be awake this is the life you get there are no servants or hand-maidens or ...
july 11 in idea barrages
You pull upside the Duke Brothers in their “General Lee”. You are driving a muscle car done up in Union colours. You tell them your car is called “The General Sherman”. They laugh and ask why. ...
Movie-theater butter, of course, isn’t actually butter at all. It’s “topping”. That stuff they put on popped corn at your local multiplex (if you still have one, if yours wasn’t put out of busine...
july 9 in idea barrages
We live in a culture that thinks the worst disease imaginable is a case of the Not-Famous and we wander through life with this imaginary leprosy, trying to mob the famous through our parasocial...
july 7 in idea barrages
If you think about it, old school 3-D movies had to be developed from a double negative. A picture of the actors for C3P0 and some of the Stormtroopers, half out of costume, on a smoke break ...
july 5 in idea barrages
Whenever baseball announcers call a leg strain a “tight hammy” I imagine Miss Piggy demanding Kermit talk during to her during sex, despite his mild and positive nature, and him only being able...
july 3 in idea barrages
A story about a warlock making a deal with an aquatic eldritch horror called PACT TO THE GILLS. “For you, Nermal,” Garfield said, Nermal’s knife holding unsteadily at Garfield’s throat, “the ...
july 1 in idea barrages
The world’s greatest mash-up would somehow stitch together that LCD Soundsystem “New York I Love You But You’re Bringing Me Down” / Miles Davis solo mash-up WITH the Bacon Pancakes / Empire Sta...
Fighting entropy, with this universe’s grim deterministic physics, is a lot like playing skeeball in a beachside arcade. You can practice and practice, but no matter how skilled you’ve become, th...
american tune in poetry
Jesus Christ the guy so nice His heart so full of love His love so great He could only hate all His shitty fan-clubs
june 29 in idea barrages
An NES video game based on the early ’60s sitcom “I’m Dickens, He’s Fenster” called “FENSTER’S QUEST”. (Bonus points, it would also be based on a John Astin starring television show!) Spider-...
june 27 in idea barrages
You know what’s interesting? Truncating fast food slogans. Burger King: HAVE IT. Subway: EAT. McDonalds: FOOD. Taco Bell: YO. Accountants are offended when you call them your “tally ho”. Even...
prompt: plot, title: the lede in "sasquatch of los angeles" flash fiction
Plot, to my tastes, is a necessary evil as best. Structure required to hold the damn thing together, bones to hang the meat from, but I can’t say I ever enjoyed a story solely for the plot. I’ve ...
june 25 in idea barrages
The only difference between Trump and Musk is the generation. In the 80s, the dullard fail-son of a rich guy craving attention would get into real estate scams. In the 2010s, the same guy gets ...
june 23 in idea barrages
We’re thinking about this whole “Morbius 2: It’s Morbin Time” thing all wrong. What if it’s a movie about a fictionalized version of the making of Morbius, where Jared Leto is actually a vampir...
you yell his name when you go for three shooting trash into the wastebasket at your job she yells his name waking up from another nightmare from the horrible things he did to her even t...
