littlefallsmets ⋅ 46 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,442
Page 123 of 218
ja8 in idea barrages
1.) I still don’t know what a Cardi B is. I think this may be one of the good things about being closer to Old. 2.) If your snowman is a rapper and has eyes made out of coal, your snowman is the ...
it’s not about how hard you worked not about the money that you made not about how many people saw it it’s about putting your truth out there put your truth out there, goddamn it the res...
it must be terrible to love the wings at Hooters but hate the sexual objectification baked on in doomed to love that one particular hot sauce and there you are in Boobieroom eating ch...
ja7 in idea barrages
1.) Your company making boutique bras for the modestly-chested will have the slogan “Support Small Business”. 2.) Wishy-washy Kylo Ren, taking so long to Sith or get off the pot. 3.) Remember in ...
how many times have you had to lie to your lover “NO, DON’T LOOK AT MY COMPUTER!” closing it quickly “I’M NOT LOOKING AT PORN, I’M… BUYING YOU A PRESENT!” “DON’T LOOK,” you stammer, “...
better than we've done in poetry
maybe if we just all got frequent full-body massages like our pets maybe we wouldn’t start wars and invent scam ride-sharing services maybe we’d just stretch out and bat at rays of sunshi...
safety warnings in poetry
millennials, I make this old man pledge to you: I will never make fun of you for having a tattoo but I reserve the right to make fun of bad tattoos so you might as well either get none or ...
there’s a CBGB’s branded restaurant at the Newark airport someone bought the name after they tore down the real thing used it to sell vinyl records and overpriced chicken salads to the rubes jus...
we gather ‘round the airport charger station much as our predecessors did around the fire electricity’s an artificially scarce thing, sure but it makes our flicker-boxes shine the same s...
better right than real in poetry
every conspiracy theory started with some desperate person deciding their view of the world must matter more than the facts of the given situation when acknowledging shared real...
ja6 in idea barrages
1.) I choose to believe Frau Blucher in Young Frankenstein was named after Blucher Ave in the Valley. I have no proof but this is my official head-canon. 2.) If these dark days don’t make you lon...
the fine print in poetry
I mean, it ended badly it ended very badly, of course for any relationship to end after enough years for it to be teenage if it were a person it has to have ended very badly like a b...
ja5 in idea barrages
1.) If I had to go into the Witness Protection, I hope I got to be like a tour guide or bus driver so I could be all “I’m Don Stopbelievin and I’m here to take you on a journey.” I would be dead ...
ja4 in idea barrages
1.) At least, the rise of the debit card is slowly killing the lame jokes about dating your checks wrong in January. We have that. 2.) Student loans officially delayed for another year. Betting o...
ja2 in idea barrages
1.) Your doom metal band will be called BENJAMIN TANKLIN at first until the bassist’s girlfriend Cindy suggested TANKENSTEIN and you reluctantly agree that it’s a lot better and change your band’...
dxxx in idea barrages
1.) If someone offers you mayonnaise, the correct response is to say “I second that emulsion”. 2.) Home Depots are very important in Los Angeles during the holidays as they’re an easy place to m...
dxxix in idea barrages
1.) The news about the new penis pumps that actually work would be big, if true. 2.) Do you rock enough to call your crust-punk band Dirt Cobain? 3.) The best name for a pornographic actor ever w...
dxxviii in idea barrages
1.) I want to dress like an Eastern European oil money plutocrat with an entourage, go into a McDonalds while an assistant orders for me but halfway through eating I just yell “GOOD! THIS IS VERY...
dxxvii in idea barrages
1.) Having social media means occasionally seeing someone you sort of know have a nervous breakdown in real time. social media is the weirdest thing we’ve ever come up with. our ape minds might n...
dxxvi in idea barrages
1.) Here’s your Christmas present: you can name your band Freak Sinatra. 2.) Maybe the REAL Harvey Danger was in knowing that it would all fall apart after a single absurd radio hit all along. 3....
xmas in idea barrages
1.) After 50 years, your homemade pornography loses its copyright and lapses into the pubic domain. 2.) Your recursive film about culture hacking and remixing will be called GRETA, GARBLED. 3.) A...
x eve in idea barrages
1.) We’re not PA-RUMP-A-PUM-PUMPED about anything, Television Commercial. You played your hand too far. It’s 2017, ain’t nobody pumped about anything .We are SA-RUMP-A-SUM-SURVIVING at best. 2.) ...
dxxiii in idea barrages
1.) The way duck skin crisps up all brown is the Mallard Reaction. 2.) You get you an Elvira in the streets, Elvira in the sheets, kinda gal. 3.) If you got in on BitCoin really early, I say to y...
dxxii in idea barrages
1.) I am not making fun of any culture, I am just saying that it is awesome that someone has a candy named “barfi” and that you can get it as “plain barfi”. I am not making fun of India but damn ...
dxxi in idea barrages
1.) The scariest movie I ever saw was THE DARK CRYSTAL and it still is. 2.) You know how they had AfterMASH, about what happened to the doctors after the Korean War, I guess they ran a hospital i...
