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1.) Do you think I sing “Smooth Criminal” to my mom’s dog? Of course I do. OLLIE ARE YOU OKAY, ARE YOU OKAY, ARE YOU OKAY OLLIE 2.) State of the Union? Jesus Christ, let’s be serious, if I was fo...

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1.) So there’s this document going around, proof that there are long-established forces opposed to the way the Trump junta “governs”. It’s called The Constitution. I’m sure they’ll say John Hanco...

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Might be missing from here for a while because I’m trying to figure out if I’m either replacing or repairing my borked laptop. If it’s the rare situation where you know me best through here b...

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1.) I still say the maple syrup production term “sugaring off” sounds dirty as hell. 2.) I really really really hope that the problem with my mom’s computer was a botched Windows 10 update that I...

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1.) I’ve never once in my life been motivated by negative reinforcement. I’ll never understand those people. Doing something to “prove someone wrong” is the farthest idea from my mindset ever. “Y...

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1.) The hardest night of every diet is the next night. It not only never gets easier, it gets very slightly harder every single day. For the rest of my life, I guess? I’m sure quitting smoking is...

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if you find people berating you to be a decent human being within mixed company it’s not “political correctness gone wild” it’s not “don’t be a sensitive child” it’s not “social justice run...

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1.) They needed someone to come in and save their human resources department from itself. Their own personnel Jesus, if you will. 2.) The problem with Access is that fans elevated to very minor c...

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they say that God gave moles their digging claws and since God matches advantage to equal flaws that high-and-mighty bastard stole away with their eyes they say there always has to be a t...

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1.) If you estimate that your business was established during Eastern Standard Time, do you write “EST EST EST” on the door? 2.) The New Testament is actually called “Testament 2: His First Assig...

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She was reticent to talk about it with her family or her friends but she knew she’d have to break it off with him. They’d met when he was working the bird desk at the biggest pet store in the are...

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1.) Branding their Halloween baked good “Boo Cakies” may not have been the best idea. 2.) You gotta take weight loss the same way Genghis Khan took Asia, steppe by steppe. 3.) Remember: serfdom r...

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1.) Good is better than perfect. Perfection has no room to change, no room to grow. Without change, in a generation, the old perfect will be evil & cruel because perfect gets stuck in its mom...

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1.) One of the things that I really loved about the TRAMONTANE CAFE’s tenth anniversary in retrospect was the care Robin and Garrett put into making sure the full spectrum of the Tram’s creative ...

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history’s empires rise and fall great queens and kings now forgotten except their names on bathroom walls receipts for wheat stamped into clay all that remains for us...

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no, keeping a facial recognition scan of yourself inside the cellphone at your hip is a great idea it’s not like any nineteen year old Russian hacker could get that in about five minutes of...

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I don’t give a damn if someone is being virtuous to be seen for it or if they’re being virtuous in saintly anonymity as long as you’re being virtuous you can “virtue signal” all you want, I sa...

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I like to say that I never get “stage fright” because I’ve always been comfortable on stage I’ve never been worried about being seeing me oh sure, I’m afraid that my material is awful ...

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1.) Now that Tram 10 is in the books, now I gotta get some new material rolling for Flash Fiction Wednesday and Utica Poets Thursday. Hey, at least now only my legs hurt and not my back AND my le...

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Proxima and Rigil, two of the sisters Centauri, two of the closest stars to our very own sun, they like to watch us from afar sometimes, up there in the night sky. It isn’t night to them, of cour...

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1.) It’s a good thing I didn’t see the Lord of the Rings movies in theatre because at the end, when they left for Valinor The Undying Lands, I would’ve wanted to announce “THE ELVISH HAVE LEFT TH...

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1.) I agree that anything worth doing is worth doing well, I will merely add that… upon consideration, there are relatively few things in this life actually worth doing. When something matters, I...

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1.) YODA. You Only Do, Always. 2.) She didn’t like saying she “had diarrhea” she preferred to say she was “freestyle scatting”. 3.) “Is that a terrible teevee dinner?” “Beef Banquet. Bingo.” 4.) ...

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1.) Last night’s nightmare, I got in a minor fenderbender and it somehow managed to ruin my entire life, putting weight back on and everything. My nightmares are not subtle. 2.) Have I made my pe...

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Here we are in the limbo between our flights that we call Layover, neither here nor there but more or less exactly where you’re supposed to be for now. Here we are in San Francisco and yet n...

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