One Angry Dwarf ⋅ 118

I AM AN ETERNAL MONSTER OF LIGHT

"i can't think of anything but butt jokes"

dude who can't think of anything but butt jokes

Entries 86

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I wrote a bunch of shit about last night but then I remembered I hadn’t written about my date yet so I’m just gonna copypaste that part and tell you about dyeing a child’s hair at some later dat...


Holy Christ, how am I NOT hungover. Honestly I probably am, it’s just waiting to bite me in the ass later. I woke up at like… 4. Ha ha. And kiiiinda drifted off a bit until 6, but not really. I w...


OH HI. I HAVE DONE FUCKALL TODAY. Hung out with Nate last night, got stoned and watched anime and comedy, all was well. NO SEX THIS TIME, we like, held hands some like tweens but that’s as far as...


UGH I HAVE BEEN JOBBING SINCE I GOT HERE AND I GOT HERE LIKE 10 MINUTES AFTER WAKING UP SO MAN IT HAS BEEN A WEIRD RIDE SO FAR. Still haven’t TOUCHED the thing I need to get done by THIS MORNING,...


7 days ago

Oops! All Dates in Public

WELP. I ACCIDENTALLY HAVE A DATE. Okay it’s not like… a date… But basically my HH of ex-coworkers has turned into JUST ME AND THE GUY I USED TO HAVE A CRUSH ON. We have never hung out solo, and o...


I AM ALONE IN THE DAMN OFFICE TODAY. Well, I mean. Everyone other than my department is here. It’s an office of like 400 people lol. But my team is the loudest and most annoying and also the clos...


I WENT TO “THE FAIR.” Literally the address for the site is “thefair.com” but everyone calls it the Puyallup fair. They don’t even call it the state fair, even though it is? I wonder how much the...


lol CW: Dieting, weight loss, way cooler hair than I have now (this one’s just for me because seeing my old hair makes me sad)


OH HI. The “munch” was boring as shiiiiit. So it was a poly thing, not a BDSM thing. But I kinda wish it had been a BDSM thing because then people would have had something in common other than “...


I FEEL LIKE TURDS. I was sick for my entire time off. At least I got SOME shit done. But still. Bleh. My boss is leaving. Big Brother might take her job. Or he might leave too. If I leave also (u...


September 01, 2018

i am so sick right now in Public

i feel like a sack of human turds, here’s a minute and thirty seconds of me trippin balls on magnum xl cold meds and talking about grocery stores bye


August 30, 2018

Welp. in Public

CW: Sexual consent, body image shit. (Not weight-related tho.) WELP. I caaaaalled it, Misha is no longer into me. It’s great because he didn’t, you know. Tell me. When it happened. Like I asked h...


And I actually like this episode pretty well!!!!! http://insignificantbush.libsyn.com/trolls-and-straws-and-marathons I should have told Carolyn to test her volume level n’ shit before we starte...


I am so fucking antsy right now SO ANTSY One hour left of this day. There has to be something I can do. OH I KNOW I’LL FINISH CLEANING OUT THIS CUBICLE OF SHIT WE ARBITRARILY STORED IN A CUBICLE...


This entry goes: 1, BULLET POINTS ABOUT LIFE, 2, STUPID #OFFICELYFE ANECDOTE, 3, DIET SHIT. I haven’t heard anything from my friend’s company on the ballah job that would solve all my problems...


ACCIDENTALLY GOT DRUNK LAST NIGHT, HOW ARE YOU. No, I mean. I should have eaten more. I barely fucking ate all day because, idk, anxiety maybe? LP and I got draaaaanks. He had shit to do that ni...


August 16, 2018

HOT SHAME in Public

Oh my god you guys. I just. I cannot. With today. I CANNOT. I fucked up a presentation harder than I’ve ever fucked up anything in my whole adult life, LOL. GOOD THING HR GUY WAS THERE TO WATCH M...


APPLIED FOR THE POSISH. SPENT ALL MORNING SCREAMING AT A POORLY WRITTEN COVER LETTER AND EVENTUALLY SAYING “FUCK IT” AND JUST SUBMITTING IT. My friend passed my name to her boss, who passed the n...


HELLO. WEEKEND SHIT. LET’S GET INTO IT. RECORDED THE PODCAST. IT’S ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD. MY VOICE IS GIRLIER THAN I THOUGHT AND IT KIND OF ANNOYS ME. I WILL UPLOAD IT TONIGHT. Went to brunch wi...


I’m on this committee at work where we try to get everyone to use their volunteer hours (we all got 40 hrs a year to volunteer instead of do our jobs, but still get paid). I can ACTUALLY PARTICIP...


Okay I absolutely shouldn’t be allowed to drink and I HAVE MORE EVIDENCE OF IT. I didn’t mention yesterday, I went out for Pacey’s last day on Friday (IT’S OVER. IT’S FINALLY OVER) and somehow, S...


GUESS WHO DIDN’T GET AROUND TO TELLING LP I’VE BANGED MISHA? BUT THEN LP DIDN’T SHOW UP TO THE GAME ANYWAY SO EVERYBODY WINS. He did show up at the very end. So I guess they did technically meet....


Man. This morning, there was supposed to be a photo shoot for a committee I’m on. Pain in the ass to schedule. Someone canceled at 4:57 PM last night. After I’d goddamn left. Didn’t see the email...


WEEEELLLLPPPPPLLLPPLPLPLL. Overwhelming majority says I should tell LP what’s up. Ugh, way to be honest with me instead of telling me what I want to hear out of loyalty. GOD. I’m seeing him tomor...


WELP. Misha is going to run a one-off game with my DnD group. Which includes LP. HELP ME MAKE A MORALLY CORRECT DECISION. Misha knows about LP. Obviously. LP knows I haven’t been keeping it in m...


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