Innervate
Entries 28
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Note: This post contains trigger words including rape. Two state troopers came to my door tonight while I was doing my homework and wanted to take my brother down to the station for questioning. ...
Day #30: One Week Water Fasting Challenge in Lifestyle Change (Diet/Exercise Posts)
I never even realized that it's been 30 days since I started this whole diet challenge. I have lost 31 pounds in the past 30 days. At the end of the first day I weigh in at 339 pounds. This time ...
Amazing News! in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
So, I don't know why I never really thought about going and living on the local Community College campus in the spring. I guess I always thought that I would have to start in the Fall Semester. ...
Not As Advertised in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Alistair's job interview was today. Not as many people showed up as he was expecting and there were 20 spots open. But the job wasn't exactly as it was advertised either. For starters, the job w...
Forgiving a Cheater in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Just had a really bad conversation with Alistair... Alistair cheated on a girl when he was 18. It's one of the few things that I really don't like about him. I was cheated on with my first boyfr...
Day #15: I lost 9 Lbs Why Aren't I Happy? in Lifestyle Change (Diet/Exercise Posts)
I lost 9 pounds this week, 15 in two weeks, I've lost more than a stone in two weeks. I was happy, really happy this morning when I got on the scale and saw 9 pounds lost after I was freaking out...
Day #12: Calm After the Storm in Lifestyle Change (Diet/Exercise Posts)
Last night was... just really bad for me. I haven't had really any cravings yet on my diet. I love everything I eat so I never felt like I was going without most of the time. Only time I've reall...
Off Day in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Today has just been an absolutely horrible day, one of the worst since my lifestyle change. Yesterday, I did an hour of cardio and burned like 1,300 calories just from exercise and had only mea...
Day #11: Off Day in Lifestyle Change (Diet/Exercise Posts)
Today was just a super off day. I ended up staying up all night and didn't want to go to bed at 11am and wake up at 7pm and completely screwed my schedule up. I like my routine of waking up at 11...
Day #09: Guessing Game in Lifestyle Change (Diet/Exercise Posts)
I hate it when my boyfriend tries to guess my weight. I've never actually told him, mostly because I'm absolutely ashamed of it. He has been completely underestimating every time, he's gone slowl...
Week #01: 6 Pounds Lost in Lifestyle Change (Diet/Exercise Posts)
I stuck to my diet and exercise plan for the week and I lost 6 pounds in the first week. Thing is, I also started my period today so I had a potential to lose anywhere from 0-6 extra pounds. I've...
Today marks the end of the first week of my diet. I've done really well on it and only cheated once (and I worked out after I did anyway). Basically, I've been doing 30 minutes of cardio (brisk ...
The Diet (Reloaded) in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
So as mentioned before I started my diet for the second time in the last month or so and it's going alright so far even though it has only been two days. Yesterday I knew I was going to be havin...
Day #02: First Real Meal Cooked in Lifestyle Change (Diet/Exercise Posts)
So as mentioned before I started my diet for the second time in the last month or so and it's going alright so far even though it has only been two days. Yesterday I knew I was going to be havin...
Never Going To Be Right in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
I thought it would be okay to just talk to my boyfriend about my diet and just try and mirror what he eats in hopes that it would help with staying more on track. Of course, we get into a weight ...
The Definition of Self Loathing in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
You attempt to strike up a conversation after a long period of silence with your boyfriend and he replies, "It's okay not to talk sometimes, we can't have long philosophical discussions everyday,...
Hard Decision... But the Right One in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Alistair and I had a lot of good discussions today as I was spending most of my day stressing out about how exactly I was going to get to England. I've known for a very long time that I wanted to...
What Is Virginity? in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Warning: Girl Stuff Talked About Throughout. When I was about 13, I was sitting on a couch with one of my male friends who had come over on the final day of school before we went our separate wa...
Negative Energy in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
My family is the absolute best at making someone feel guilty for even the slightest thing they think they've done wrong. I'm perfectly aware that I cheated on my diet last week. I had a cupcake ...
Diet Flop and Restart in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Urgh... So I knew I had to have gained weight this week because I crashed on my diet super hard. To be fair, I had only been on it like a week but still... So I knew that I had probably gained ...
Private Photos and Thoughts in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
So today I did something I never thought I would do... I sent some private photos to Alistair. I mean, it's not like it's a bad thing, I didn't feel forced into it and he didn't really ask for t...
Rough Patch in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Really didn't have the greatest day today, it was filled with a lot of tears. Ali and I talked about a lot of hard subjects today. Today was the first day that he said out loud that he wasn't su...
Insecurities in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
Ali and I talked about insecurities tonight... I guess for someone who never seems to let anything bother him it was a little nice to hear him confess somethings that he was insecure about; even...
#05 - Housing Conundrum (College Post) in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
It's starting to get really bad at home again. My brother is talking about moving out so that obviously means that I get the brunt of pretty much everything since I'm still at home. I should be g...
#04 - Money Woes (Financial Post) in Elaina - Vita Post Mortem
So the next few days are probably going to be extremely long and stressful. My grandmother opened up her credit card bill to find almost $1,000 worth of charges on it. Most of them not from any ...