Entries 73

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Wow… where to start… I guess because I don’t want to be click-baity and bury the lead, my mom, my sister and I had a genuine conversation where we talked about our history, aired some long held ...

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Tonight was our weekly craft night, and it kind of started off on the wrong foot. One of the women, let’s call her Lilly, She has such a calm quiet energy and I don’t know why but it makes me fee...

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This is a question my psychologist suggested I ponder. That was two weeks ago. I’ve thought about the task, but I keep getting stuck. Part of it is an excuse - but I want to change! But I believe...

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I have thought a lot about unmasking in the last year. It started back in Wpg when I saw a series of “challenge” TikToks of people “unmasking”. To the untrained eye it legit just looked like some...

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I feel like pieces of my insides are like a jenga set, but instead of taking order and making it chaos until it collapses, I feel like the opposite is happening. The chaos is becoming organized, ...

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Well… I went to see the Barbie movie. I was originally torn about it, until the hype reached my peers, and I reconsidered the last 30 odd years of feeling bad for my Barbie loving past. I was a ...

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After the session I texted my sister e: I wonder what it means when told by your therapist to think of a place of comfort and you think of your spouse and start to cry. And then immediately stop ...

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I came here to write about my mood, my first EMDR session, and then get into birthday stuff… Instead, in trying to copy/paste a too-long excerpt I ended up somehow writing over the entire length...

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It’s hard to keep everything front of mind, and not let this brain of mine run with the bullshit it makes up. I have been hyper emotional lately, and there’s a few good reasons for it, but instea...

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I saw Tina again. I say Tina with a hint of disrespect, but it isn’t warranted, just my own stupid bias. I really would like to call her Dr. LastName, but she’s a hyphenate and that makes me craz...

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I stole this from Midorinokaeru aaaages ago, it’s been sitting in my drafts for a while. Answers were updated to today. I reserve the right to delete stupid fucking questions. Life Goal: Love as...

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I’ve been feeling quite low since the thunderstorm. It feels unnatural, uninstigated. There’s been a buzzing in my core that feels like anxiety, but I have no idea what I’m feeling anxious about....

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Many years ago, 2012 I think, I had an encounter in a gravel pit with a growling Rottweiler. I screamed bloody murder for help as it advanced on me. I was barefoot, with floppy summer shoes in ha...

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As much as I have been seeking, I have been avoiding. The fact that I don’t write with any regularity tells me this is true. I have no excuse - I need no excuse - I’ve just been over here doing l...

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So I’ve been on Guanfacine for about 2 weeks, and I think I notice some changes. First of all, I’m sleeping like the dead. I am a rare ADHDer who doesn’t have a co-morbid sleep disorder. I’ve sle...

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My boss is a fucking gem. I swear every other interaction with him works to restore my hope for a career in this organization. Today he was talking to a coworker about their fucked up promotion/...

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M has been discharged!!! I was not thinking it was going to happen, he had IV meds when I got there at 8. But after they kicked in he ate his breakfast unassisted, walked around the room, we had ...

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I seriously doubt it will happen, but today was a much better day and the doc implied that M could leave tomorrow. There’s two stages that I think are confusing people in my previous entry. When...

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Man, if I’d written this when I came back from lunch it’d be a completely different entry. He was so lucid! We had a pretty good conversation. We chatted with nurses and the doc. Things were look...

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I woke up to a voicemail from M. We don’t do voicemail with each other. His pained voice telling me he’s calling an ambulance. I don’t hear from him again until after noon. Mom, my sister and I ...

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Friday was hectic. I was up early to finish getting ready, and out the door shortly after 7. I drove to pick up Red, and then drove to the airport. I got flagged twice at security, because of cou...

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I had possibly the best example of why my brain is absolutely fucking ridiculous. So growing up my dad and I went to a bunch of air shows. I loved it, the acrobatics, the noise, the size, the te...

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I expected to be exhausted when I got home today. I swapped one of my days off so I got today off with Red, I work tomorrow and then I’m off for a longish weekend. Red had some pet errands to do,...

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It has already been A Week. Not all bad, but not feeling great right now. I had a session with my psych yesterday. We talked about how things have been and she actually listened. I told her abou...

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I had a counselling session Thursday. It was less than stellar. It was another instance where I’m telling a story that, to me, is clearly some part of my neuro-divergence, but she has no idea, so...

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