Entries 23
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twenty-three
Sleep is a prison cell I keep finding myself returning to locked inside with all the bedmates of my past. The bars slam shut and I am faced with the hundreds of stains covering the bed with p...
twenty-two
I am working through this trauma. This trauma you gave me. But this trauma is the loud, screaming your name at the top its lungs until nothing else fits in my head the shallow earth bursting wi...
twenty-one
sometimes late at night when i’ve had too much fear to drink i wish you had hurt me physically, i mean the kind of hurt that leaves bodies and trails scratches and slaps and bruises on arms or hi...
twenty
i was easier to listen to when i was only love and light now that suffering has crept into my voice you look away into the distance of the past where i only loved you i didn’t need love back
nineteen
i never wanted to be your wife i wanted to be your salvation the gentle promise of hope on the horizon that would breathe recovery into your addiction and make it bleed on the ground beside the...
eighteen
i have found memory she was scared of you so afraid she hid beneath quiet breathing and silent hope for kindness she was scared by you and every other man that touched her saw her skittish nature...
seventeen
you treat me like a casualty of the war inside your head
sixteen
“Just talk to someone.” the messenger list of who i’ve been talking to is a problem. i just don’t trust any of them. “You have to trust a couple?” sure. maybe. they’ve got big capital P problems....
fifteen
once I poured my loneliness into the void where language was my lover
fourteen
i’m tired of this pain you put in me keep it in your own heart; mine is occupied by the scars you left behind.
thirteen
tonight is the first night of fear it sits in my stomach and chews away at the intestines reminds me of the love i bear even as i shed my lovers like dreams upon waking it lives on what ifs and c...
twelve
the world bears witness to your grief stricken tears, public loss dreams you must kill in exchange for dreams slaughtered. mourn the loss of me create space for yourself to fully feel the void i ...
eleven
you drift away. swallowed within the void of your heart glass walls fogged with regret sit between us droplets of promises we’ll never keep memories unmade fade around us we could never save us f...
ten
i need you to be in love with me. not love me. be consumed. smile stupidly when you see me. drown me in your need. let me fill you up with all of me. i will pour myself inside of you find a home ...
nine
suck on the bones of our decaying remains. consume the marrow swallow our essence let it transform you: body, soul, heart sex. eat of us grow fat on vindication salivate indignation scoop out ou...
eight
i want to celebrate this life i’ve had with you. To the towers now toppling the myths unraveling the dreams undiscovered the beauty untouched. Our great city built on in-jokes and broken promise...
seven
step into my dreams rescue me from the ocean i nightly drown in blow oxygen from your heart to kindle mine
six
i keep the page with your chicken scrawl handwriting. notes for a meeting. name. time. place. a number. that kind of meeting, important Things Get Done and Decided. a meeting that means nothing t...
five
i am a stepping stone to your best self designed for your self discovery created for your grand epiphany ears for listening eyes for witnessing hands for comforting heart for loving i am all you ...
four
you stripped safety in your need. waking from frightened sleep to your thrust and grunt your weight on my body over and over and over again. i stopped sleeping in our bed, you decried a sign of d...
three
help me discover myself in the void of the world i need to hear your voice. an anchor. spreading wings with plucked feathers scattered on the sacred ground where you stand steady, stoic face and...
two
i can’t be measured with you. You rip reason from hands and leave behind bits of poems and tea leaves. they promise things without names we won’t name, secretly name, lingering with fear and hesi...
one
your eyes on me, not mine; meal to be consumed prey to be hunted creature to be tamed. devour me with hunger’s gaze touch me fingers lined with starvation my flesh, a feast. you were loved wa...
