Miss Chiffs Manager ⋅ 36
Wife / Mom! / Biodynamic Urban Farmer / Nutrition Science Buff / Ultra Frugal (Cheap!) Lifestylist / Avid Reader / Writer Extraordinaire / In Pursuit of Moral, Physical, and Intellectual Excellence.
If you do not possess a deep capacity for Anger, your Compassion or so-called Gentleness means nothing to me.
Entries 440
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It’s been awhile. A lot has been going on. I’m not sure if transformative is the right word. But things have changed… Quite a lot. I’ve talked with DH more than we have have in any time window....
I woke up crying. I felt such a gentle, subtle, and far away grief. Yet deep. As deep as I could ever feel. It was a very unique experience. I imagined that there was a lover deep inside of me, ...
Be a Leader and Obey in Journal
Those were the words I heard spoken today. It was not ironic. It was not sarcastic. It was said with sincerity. I don’t know if we all have just collectively lost the ability to have a sort of…...
Spiritual Science in Journal
and the subjective experience. My relationship to the subjective is uneasy and skeptical. I think that comes out of being physically and emotionally abused as a child. Most people have that unfor...
Embarrassing in Journal
When you chaffe against someone who doesn’t play your game. Just name call. Act superior. Do whatever except the honorable. Okay. I hear you. I accept your lack of honor. Begone. I defer to reali...
Starting Over in Journal
from first principles. It does seem daunting, as an adult, to have to start over. But, that is exactly what I did. I think there must be a big enough Why for anyone to accomplish this. That is j...
What to say... in Journal
I feel as if I’ve gone back in time…a decade, to be precise. I daresay that I look like it, too. I looked at my face in the mirror today, and I was surprised. I can be a bit-well, impulsive. I h...
a name I haven’t seen in years. And it brought me back. I can imagine this person asking me, “So, what have you done with yourself in all these years?” An innocent enough question, although I fee...
Wow am I ever NOT a baker. I’ve been using sourdough to make bread for over a year now. And it’s always.... Well. It’s bread but it’s also a door stop. Lol I just recently started trying to make ...
Thoughts on Steiner in Journal
“I previously said that we should relate to children until puberty in such a way that they recognize us as an authority, that they accept something because someone standing next to them who is vi...
From Fluff to Stuff in Journal
Pretty self explanatory. First time for all of it. Harvested the wool, prepared it (minimally), hand spun it on a drop spindle, wound it by hand. I need to ply it. Not the greatest yarn, ob...
12 Days I must say that I felt no small amount of- not joy, not happiness, not contentment- but.. of what, exactly? Self importance… A certain sense of knowing that someone at least feels an obli...
Merry Christmas in Journal
The kids’ nativity scene that they can play with (it’s doesn’t last long set up lol) My cat is a one person cat. She hates everyone else but loves me- I’m her car mom since I found her when she ...
Done and no pics to show 😂 I swear I did finish like 90% of my list from before. The dino turned out so stinking cute. I’m bummed I didn’t get a pic. Oh but I did get a pic of this; Hah. This ...
I am humbled. I am more than humbled. I am Humiliated. I asked my unconscious. And. You know what? I did not respect it’s power. It did not worship it’s integrity. It had no thought for what my ...
Fuck Off, Mom in A Childhood Lost
I’m done. Absolutely done. I don’t want any more of your shit. I need you to just shut the fuck up. Listen to me for the first time in your life. Stop. Just stop. Listen. I can’t take the blame. ...
for Thanksgiving. I shouldn’t say just us, because I actually feel really warm, full and content to have 2 days of DH home, nothing going on to cook to my delight and let the kids sink into relax...
Started on the dinosaur, have some stars made/working on more, and made a wreath. Woo! Also dipped a few leaves in wax to see how they would come out and added back to our nature corner. Made an ...
That's a lot of in Journal
Woolies And not even all of them. I’m not sure what I want to write. DH and I have had a lot of conversations, deep and.. exhausting. I’m so tired. It is a good tired. Like the tired after swim...
I'm Gonna Make-! in Journal
Beeswax candles Beeswax candle decorations Modeling beeswax, of various colors Beeswax food wraps Window stars An advent window transparency scene A sweater (for me) An advent wreath Another cowl...
There are lots of ways that I am like my mother. I realized that I am still too angry to be productively curious about my mother. So, why am I angry? Because I am not safe. Still. I’m still not ...
Today, I learned in Journal
how much I loved children and wanted to be a mom. Not just now, but my whole life. The feeling is so very refreshing- to experience this love of innocence and fierce dedication to my own babies....
Dream! Dream, I had a Dream in Dreams
I haven’t dreamt in quite awhile due to sleep problems. But the last week has been better. And now I’ve finally had a dream. For context, I listened to a podcast about what to ask your unconscio...
Goes on. Sometimes that is comforting. Sometimes it really isn’t. I would like for my own children to experience a slow, but very dear, childhood. I’ve gone a long way to providing that. And t...
Makin stuff in Journal
Just finished this really cute sweater for Lexi. It’s the same front and back- so the shoulders are really not covered. Makes for more of a cozy outer layer sweater than the one I made previous. ...
