Entries 3,529

Page 102 of 142

1.) I refuse to respect or accept wealth that was built on fraud, power that was built on fraud, position that was built on fraud. 2.) I am going to be hijacking the hell out of the Logan movie’s...

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1.) Your band will be called “Rebecca Romaine-Lettuce”. 2.) Happy VD everyone. may you all enjoy your VDs, in whatever form they take. 3.) Over a lifetime, a woman or a man is a plaything of the ...

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1.) Focusing on what you want won’t get you anywhere, how to get it will only take you dark places. Ask why you want it instead. 2.) “I Would Do Anything For Love But I Won’t Do That” is an early...

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1.) The bastards know that no educated populace would allow their reign of corruption & hate so they dismantle education. 2.) All I’m saying is Panera Bread would be a lot cooler if it were P...

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1.) A great name for an autobiography would be “Naked From The Neck Up”. 2.) Our main hope is that these fascists have opened up battles on too many fronts at once and we can repel them as such. ...

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1.) More than anything, Game Show Host was installed to hoard privilege that a few were born into from those who were born struggling. 2.) Stockholm Syndrome. If you’re not rich or a Nazi and yo...

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1.) Maze. Your people call it “labyrinth”. 2.) Get old or die trying. 3.) Two ships passing in the dark long night of attempted meaning construction, just a couple of existential dreadnoughts. 4....

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1.) Was a lot written in ‘30s Europe about how weirdly day-to-day the rise of fascism could feel if you ignored the news? We can write it now. 2.) It was the best of February rap battles, it was ...

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1.) Are the streets of Athens covered in a bunch of Ath-holes? 2.) I’d rather we get out of this awful charade without violence. Is that my privilege showing how I’d rather not add vengeance to r...

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1.) If being good at football gets a guy forgiven for supporting fascism, that’s an everything problem. 2.) The idiots who spend their time telling us we’re “sensitive snowflakes” now want to boy...

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1.) Catholic schools are filled with teachers of habit. 2.) The Fraternious T.U.C.K. loves it when you call him Big Pauper. 3.) Sir Mix-A-Lot has a cousin who is an OB-Gyn, Sir Vix-A-Lot. 4.) Chi...

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1.) The island of metaphor, the summer camp where nothing literally makes sense, I hadn’t been there in my dreams in years. It was dying. 2.) The secret party house, the place where people let th...

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1.) The hardest gap to cross now is the Trump followers who know what’s happening but can’t admit it to themselves because of what it’d make em. They realize they accidentally backed white nation...

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1.) We will be the living repositories of the histories the bastards try to erase. 2.) Blockin eggs BAYBEE/blockin’ eggs baby/TWIT-TER EGGS/twitter eggs/cmoncmoncmon baby now/c’mon baby/BLOCKIN E...

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1.) Everybody put your hands up head-ish, wave ‘em ‘round like you’re apathetic. 2.) No Supreme Court justice can legitimately spring from a “presidency” that was illegitimately taken from th...

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1.) (to the tune of “Bacon Pancakes”) Blockin’ Twitter Eggs/blockin’ racist Twitter Eggs/I take the blocker and I put it to the Twitter Egg/ain’t gonna talk/ain’t gonna beg/BLOCKIN’ SOME EGGS! ...

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1.) False equivalence is the death of journalism. Giving hatemongers “equal time” isn’t fairness, it’s collaboration with Nazis. 2.) Flo always demanded we kiss her grits but we never even saw he...

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1.) Point of order: don’t call him “Steve Bannon”, call him “known neo-Nazi propagandist Steve Bannon”. 2.) An alien describing the Super Bowl: “Rich people make minorities try to cripple each ot...

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1.) Whenever someone mentions “slipping into their DMs” on Twitter, pretend you think they’re talking about sex with a D&D dungeonmaster. 2.) Hipster astronauts, always going on about their r...

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1.) To this day I’m still surprised that Ben and Jerry didn’t double down on Cherry Garcia’s success with “A Touch of Grape”. 2.) The Lion King, all the way through, no changes except Poomba has ...

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1.) Asked for a preliminary opinion, the coroner could only reply “remains to be seen”. 2.) Crossfit’s hard but the worst part is when they drive the nails in. 3.) A tee-shirt with a picture...

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1.) Fascism is fundamentally about disregarding reality & replacing it with artifice that supports their hate. Remember that when engaging them. 2.) Call the pants you wear to Disney World yo...

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1.) If you ever need to tell someone you’re heading off to a bed and breakfast, just type “BRB BNB”. 2.) Remember: all appointments & laws enacted by a “president” installed by foreign espion...

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1.) Now you have to make Meta-Krispie Treats by making Rice Krispie Treats out of Rice Krispie Treats cereal. 2.) The “Come Together Let-Down” is the psychological reaction to thinking a great so...

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1.) The attempt to eradicate the flu is something of a cold war. 2.) Your film about a dystopian future where actors are only allowed to play man-children until 40 will be called SETH ROGEN’S RUN...

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