Public

Hello

by J.E.

Entries 645

Page 1 of 26

2 days ago

Cried In Bed Today

I’m just so lost today… I dreamed of her and it hurt all over again.


3 days ago

Tip Me On My Side

And roll me out the door. Friday’s Festivities We all pitched in and the supervisor grilled us steaks. Complete with salad kits and a baked potato with all the fixin’s. I’m on the last five minu...


3 days ago

Random Musings

The Horror At Gilligan’s Island The Professor comes across the journal of an explorer long dead. In it is a crude map and detailed descriptions of a plant thought extinct know for it’s healing p...


What’s your least favorite season? The dog days of Alabama summer. Do you prefer to text or call? Text Morning or night? Afternoon early dusk Do you like tacos? Do I like breathing? Are you an ...


7 days ago

Relapsed

I drank last night. I feel like shit today, well deserved. Today would have been 42 days sober. Back on the wagon I go. (Peacock came by and got most of her things. She wants nothing to do with m...


April 29, 2021

2:52 AM

Monday at work I did a bunch of heavy lifting. Due to intense back pain (and hardly any sleep) I called out Tuesday (and missed Wednesday.) Peacock came to visit and was a doll. Drove me aroun...


April 26, 2021

Feelings In The Wild

There are no words For what I want to say No description For what I feel It’s a non-emotion It’s something gray Way down Inside of me -Minor Threat I have felt that all day.


April 25, 2021

That Really Sucked

I’ve been jonesin’ for a drink sin Saturday night. Treated mom out and got fixated on the drink menu. That carried over into tonight. Luckily I was able to talk to a friend which calmed my nerv...


April 22, 2021

Stuffed Jive Turkey

Tonight was the quarterly meeting/dinner. They fed us Steak Out. I ordered the beef tips with sweet potato, buttered roll and side salad with balsamic vinaigrette. Damn. I DID NOT want to go b...


April 20, 2021

Okay, Now It's Time

One month off booze. I’m bummed tonight, have a headache and really don’t want to think anymore tonight.


April 19, 2021

Oops?

According to my day counter on Reddit it hasn’t been a month. Only twenty-eight days. Oops?


It is now one month sober for me as of midnight. I found myself having a mild craving for a drink Saturday night but the knowledge that one month was upon me strengthened my determination. I wen...


Frasier is on again. Just got finished enjoying a small bag of Starburst gummies. Work tonight was smooth. Left the lathe running with only one adjustment to diameter size of the bolt I was ma...


April 15, 2021

Narrowing The Cheekbones

Logan’s Run is on in the background. Laying on the heating pad. Despite lack of sleep life has been good lately. Peacock is coming by tomorrow and we both have a topic to discuss about our add...


April 15, 2021

Tree-Fordy-Fife Ay Em

My feet and lower back are killing me tonight. For once I’m actually in my bed and not the couch. Will sleep come easy? Probably not.


April 13, 2021

Lost Romance

Woke up on the wrong side of the couch today. Went to get a hotdog for lunch. Out of liquid cheese and the mustard dispenser jizzed all over my cargo shorts, not the actual hotdog. I got into...


I’ve been watching Frasier reruns late at night after work. Almost forgot how funny this show was. Tempted to buy the DVD sets. Actually have been REAL tempted to rebuild my collection from DV...


Not Pets! Batman: The Animated Series is beautiful in Blu Ray. 4:07 AM Therapy was at noon and we dived in to one of the EMDR techniques. Pretty interesting. Afterwards I ran a few errands and...


April 08, 2021

11:47 PM

13 minutes till quitting time. Three hours of sleep. 5 AM to 8 AM. Dealership fixed car. Bought tickets for concert. Traffic ticket was tossed. Went to work. I can barely stand right now without ...


April 08, 2021

Pins And Needles

My hands are really sore tonight. Over use. I’m really beat. Been pretty busy at work. By now the job I’m on has become a repetitive routine but we’re nearing the end of the run. I have no i...


April 04, 2021

Zombie Jesus Day!

I slept till two in the afternoon. Was having difficulty sleeping last night so I took two pills and zonked out hard. No wonder, I’ve been pretty damn busy all week. Ate a sandwich with some o...


April 03, 2021

Sheriff, John

Bugs Bunny meets Robin Hood on in the background. Got off early for Good Friday. Peacock came by and we had wild hot monkey sex twice. We got up early today as we both had things to do. I mow...


April 01, 2021

No Sleep 'Till

BROOKLYN!!!!! Hardly slept last night. Ate at least three big handfuls of freakin’ chocolate eggs. I know the alcohol is put of my system when I’m craving sugar hardcore. Got up at nine-thirty...


April 01, 2021

I'm Afraid Our Time Is Up

I forgot how funny Frasier was. Been catching the three AM reruns on a local network that airs old television series. The mechanic took less than five minutes to tell me I need to take the car to...


Sunday night Peacock came over and we had a long talk about everything from the beginning of our relationship till now. It boils down to me being miserable since I broke up with her and she has g...


Book Description

I came on my own volition.
I am the man that got away.

Work -
Tonight I clocked in at 4:30 PM and it was suddenly Wednesday when I worked 6:45 AM to 6 PM with only an hour lunch break and on my feet the rest. I was trying to relieve Logan in the back who was frying chicken both for our loose case and boxed hot case so he could go to lunch. Instead I got mixed with a redneck who wanted a Philly steak and cheese. I made his sandwich to order only to be confronted with the elderly gentleman behind him. He, to this shit. o, wanted a Philly. I was annoyed. Angry. Granted chicken side cooking sucks At least you’re away from the customers. I can, “pretend”, like I’m cooking chicken in the back but dick around for ten minutes, which actually rarely happens. You learn to smile and accept this shit. Made him his sandwich, didn’t stop to ask the next customer if he needed help. Instead, went straight to the back and told Logan to take his lunch, I was taking over, box up what just came up out the fryer and we’re good.

It was just one of those days. People wonder why I get stoned before work.

I.
Am.
Robot.

Tell.
Me.
What.
Is.
Next.

I’m versatile.
Put me in any situation and I come victorious.
Even on the bad days.

So when I go the hardcore bitch mode of my assistant manager on Wednesday after my eleventh hour there. I got irate.

I know she does a job for two.
Her boss/my boss sucks ass.
But fuck....I’m part time.
If you want to bitch and yell about the shit that the full timers didn’t do…bitch to them.
DON’T MAKE ME DO THEIR FUCKING SHIT THE LAST HOUR I’M THERE!
I’ve been working for this slave camp for three and a half years.
I lost my insurance last year due to me being stupid and the store manager catching on. Which is actually a big blessing. I haven’t missed a day in a year.

But I’ve been there for every shift.
Sleep, no sleep?
Fuck it.
Show up for work.
The computer takes over on schedule and now I don’t qualify for our good insurance.
I have to take the government stuff?
OK.
I’m a democrat.
Lifelong.
BUT FUCK YOU OBAMA!
Don’t tell me what to do.
I’ll go another year without health insurance.
I want my good Blue Cross Blue Shield Back.
Make my job give me the hours back for insurance.

People close to me say I need to see a therapist.
After A.A. and an almost check in at rehab.
Maybe I do need anti-depressants.

This is a rant with no one I know reading this.
Its liberating.

I welcome ProseBox into my life.