who cares about the date in I'm making this up as I go along

I don’t see the point in only missing someone on the anniversary of their death. Or the anniversary of the day they first kissed you. I think that it’s okay to celebrate the anniversary every day. Sixteen years ago I started a crazy time in my life. Things happened to me that I could never have even dreamed up. If I feel like being sad that someone put a shot gun in his own mouth and pulled the trigger, I don’t think that it has to be April 5th. If I’m sad that a 22 year old BOY (cause that is what you are at 22) stuck one too many needles in his arm one night, it shouldn’t have to be June 22nd.
There are so many things that I wish I had said that I did not say. So many times that when I am blind sided, my mind goes blank. I can’t help it. That’s just who I am. I have tried many times to remedy this flaw of mine. Guess what. It ain’t going anywhere. I don’t know how to think on my feet. I hate being treated like I do it on purpose. Nope. Sure don’t.
If I want to celebrate a marriage still going strong, it shouldn’t have to be November 11th. Why do date nights have to be so far in between?
Oh, and to the next person that tells me that they think that sonic youth sucks, I can’t help it, I love the sound a guitar makes when you stick a drumstick in the strings. Yup. K I’m done.