stay focused in 2017

2:49pm

I can’t believe it’s Friday already. These weeks are going by so quickly, which is good. But then I think about all we have left to do and the short amount of time we have to do it. I know it’ll skip on by and next thing I know I’ll be sitting in my courtyard with an ice cold beer enjoying the sunshine. :)

Better stay focused for now though!

And I would be slightly more focused in this very moment if TF had not just left the office. =\

Mom asked me to call him this morning since he still hadn’t shown up with the letter. I said she could call if she wanted, but I wasn’t going to.
Oh to backtrack and keep things in order: I talked to him on the phone the other day right? Then he didn’t show up. Normally I’d send a message telling him he forgot or asking when he’s going to stop in, but I didn’t this time. Self control for the win! :) The next morning [yesterday] I was poking through my bag and saw a new text on my phone. It said, “have a busy day Rose” because you know he can’t be nice. I replied in the afternoon saying “thanks, I think?” and telling him it had been busy. He said he knew and I asked if he was stalking me. He said “duh” and I told him that that was kinda creepy. He then called me a creep. hah. Later after I got out of work [at almost 8pm!] I said that if he were any nicer to me I don’t think I could handle it. He goes, “I don’t think you could handle it anyway” and eventually I told him that I didn’t think he knew me at all and I guess we’d never know.

So yeah, I was definitely not going to call him today. I don’t get why he can’t be nice? Like he seriously is that kid on the playground pushing me down and scraping up my knees. sigh

It’s funny because he doesn’t realize how easy it would be to get what he wants. Just don’t bullsh*t me! It’s not that hard. I actually had a moment last night where I was thinking that it kinda sucks that I have such a good bs detector. Like I can imagine how easy it is for people to fall for such charming words and I can’t do it! I can’t just accept his words at face value because I can tell they aren’t always the truth. Or they are, but they’re like an exaggerated version of the truth. I don’t know. It’s really hard to explain.

Anyway, Mom called him and told him he needed to bring it asap and he said he’d stop in after work. Which you never know if he’s actually going to show up because he’s so forgetful.
I’d gone to the back to grab some chapstick and was just sitting back down when I saw a truck turn into the parking lot behind the construction guy that’s working on repaving the lot. [He is extremely gorgeous by the way! Like I want to take a picture of him and post it on my bedroom wall! ;) Those tight jeans and cowboy boots. yikes! I’m into that…] The truck was completely covered in dust but it looked like it could be the right color underneath. My heart was just starting to race when I saw him walking by the window. His son was with him, but he walked in and immediately sat down in the chairs by the balloons. I told TF I’d be right with him because Mom had just asked me to look something up for her. He’s such a distraction though that it took me a minute to find what I needed. And he goes, “No! I need you right now.” Or something like that. I’m wondering now what he actually said. Like if he was trying to make a subtle comment about “wanting me” now. I wasn’t paying enough attention though.

He tried to hold my hand while I was using the mouse to click through the form I was researching. I picked my hand up from the mouse and shook him off and then put my hand back down. I wasn’t trying to be super rude, or anything, but 1) I was trying to work and 2) he hasn’t been that nice lately.

It turns out that the letter is related to the same case and they want him to call to verify some information. When I told him this he acted all shocked and I was like, “didn’t you read it? It says right here” and pointed at the middle of the page where the instructions were. hah. He said he couldn’t do it today and I said that was fine because they were probably busy. He told me that Monday would be better and he got his son up to leave. I was telling him to call in case it was busy and he asked when we’d be free. There was a lot of “you call” or “I’ll call” back and forth. I looked at Monday’s appointments and there’s only one person so I said it would have to be after 11am because Mom’s not here in the morning. He said that was fine.

He’d tried to hold my hand again while I was reading the letter. He grabbed my right hand to look at my owl ring and pulled it up towards him. I think I let him hold it for like 2 seconds before I pulled away again. He said it was really nice and then whispered something I couldn’t hear so I asked him to repeat it and he goes, “did your boyfriend get that for you?” And I looked him right in the eye and said yeah without hesitation. He just kinda smiled and didn’t say anything else. =] Later he made a comment about how great my shirt was [it’s a logoed work shirt]. He asked if he could get one and I said yeah if he worked here. So he asked if he could get a job here and I said no. Flat out, all serious again. Don’t mess with me man! Two can play this game.

I did have trouble looking him in the eye though. Those eyes have always been my downfall. Even before he started flirting with me. I always thought he had the most beautiful eyes. hah. So I mostly avoided them unless he was directly asking me a question. Or I’d look up to say something to him. I didn’t do a lot of smiling either. Wasn’t really in the mood to flirt with him. Not if he’s not going to admit to liking me. I’m not willing to waste my time on a joke.

His son looked super upset. It was sad. I haven’t seen him in like a year. He’s so big! But he walked in and just crumpled into the chair and didn’t say a word. TF said he was in a bad mood and I asked what he did to him but he made a joke. Later when they got up to leave his son went out the door and TF stopped to talk to me. I said he was going to leave without him and asked what was wrong again. TF had been asking him if he wanted candy, or the balloons, or money, and the kid kept saying no in an annoyed sorta way.
So TF ended up telling me that I guess he’d invited one of his good friends to hang out and the boy’s mom said no. Apparently she always says no but little tf keeps asking. He said he’d asked his son why he keeps asking if he knows she’s going to say no and he’ll get bummed out, but I guess he just really wants to hang out with his friend. Poor kid. I felt so bad for him. Like I wanted to go out and eat pizza with him and play tag on the lawn. haha. [apparently that’s what all little boys love to do with me because I always get suckered into chasing my various neighbor’s kids around our lawn! Which I’m way too old for!]

Ok. I totally e-mailed TF like 20 minutes ago because I’m a sucker. Maybe he’ll give me the silent treatment this time. Which is fine. I was surprised he didn’t mention anything about the flowers on my desk. [he literally just e-mailed me back. ha] Also his brother brought us a bag filled with fresh vegetables this morning! He joked that he was going to go broke feeding us and I told him he’s never seen us eat. He should have checked before he started. haha! He’s so nice though. Why isn’t he the single one? =P

I still have no idea what I’m doing here. Taking it one day at a time I guess?

Looks like we might get out early so I’m taking Mom to dinner and having a beer [or two] and going home to relax.

rose.
5:49pm