scared of the scale in Weight Loss Surgery

lol

So I mentioned yesterday was going to be a fun day out and I was worried about eating. I didn’t get to see everyone’s idea about me just saying I had a tummy ache so I didn’t use that excuse. It’s a good idea tho!

My sis (a pastry chef) already had a bakery lined up as soon as we got into the city.

So basically my intermittent fasting was screwed.

I got a chai and a big ol morning bun. I guess I ate a 3rd of it and finished the coffee.

Then around 1 pm we went to the museum’s caf and I got a slice of pizza. There was other options but it was buffet style and it was busy as hell. Seeing all those people swarming the buffet during Covid was off putting so I got a slice of pizza because it was warmed to order and behind glass. Less people breathing on it.

And it was shitty pizza, lemme tell you. But it was just SOMETHING because I felt self conscious not eating lunch when my sister and niece were. Yes I was hungry but I could have pushed through if I wasn’t with them. I’ve been doing this over a week now anyway.

Then my sister bought M&Ms too and I did indulge. Truthfully the pizza made me feel sluggish and I already felt “ruined” so I thought the sugar would perk me up.

It didn’t, I just felt over stuffed and no more energetic.

For dinner we went to a Chinese place and I didn’t like what I ordered so I didn’t eat much of it but I did have all 6 veggie dumplings (appetizer) and then we went to a dessert place and I had an oreo donut complete with marshmallows on top. And a couple of licks of my nieces ice cream cone.

So I really, Really, REALLY went off track as the day went on which is why I don’t want to even step on the scale today. This is why I got the surgery to begin with. I just can’t stop. I make all these justifications and excuses for why I eat the way I do but basically I fully believe I’m addicted to sugar mainly but eating that good tasting bad food as well. I just do it and have trouble stopping. I’m addicting to the feeling in my brain, in my stomach, I just want/need it.

That seems to be why fasting is going well now, cause if I don’t start (esp. first thing in the morning) I can hold out. But once I start… good luck.

I assume that I’ve gained but to see the number will really affect my mood, so I didn’t weigh in…

So far today I am back on track as far as fasting. My family plans to go to the movies tonight but I do not want to eat bad movie food. So I will eat something at home before hand to hold me over. Plus the last time I went to the movie I got pretzel nuggets and they were so damn salty. Even when I rubbed the pretzel salt off. Maybe it was the cheese - or both.

I really don’t even want their move food anyway. Just need to eat something so I don’t get desperate and eat badly.

So if I can keep it together tonight I’ll weigh in tomorrow and see if I really gained all 3 lbs back from one day eating all of NYC. Which is completely possible because I’ve gained more for one bad day of eating in the past! My body loves to put on fat lol.

Or it use to, now it has to love to lose this fat lol.

Sometimes my body pleasantly surprises me so it’s really unpredictable. I’ll just have to check tomorrow.

My eating is weird because I was basically eating leftovers lol

FOOD

9am - 12pm - 170cals - coffee with creamer
330pm - 4pm 250cals 3 pieces of breaded cauli and 2 chix nuggets
430pm - 530pm - 200cals - banana pudding and added handful of almonds
6pm - 630pm - 200dals - hot dog with cheese

Total cals - 820cals

Total water - 2 cups

EXERCISE
I don’t think I’m getting any today

Last updated June 25, 2022