Holidaze in These Foolish Things

The days and weeks seem to fly by now. Now that I’m not counting my days and weeks by my chemotherapy treatments I seem to lose track of the days more and more. I used to go by my nausea waves and my blurry-ness and how many days until the next torture. Now it feels like I’m almost back to the way things were.

But I don’t want to get complacent! I want to enjoy the eff out of Every. Single. Day.

Had a fun weekend last weekend, including having people over for the park lights and the concert. It’s so great that we can hear the music from my balcony in the Treehouse, so we don’t necessarily have to get down into the crowd. And yes, a crowd shows up every weekend. It was nice to have Marce and Maria and my friend J (who was the one who introduced me to the NFL dude in her neighborhood on Halloween night. By the way, I never heard anything back about him, and I didn’t ask). Marce spent the night and I’m glad she did because she was slurring heavily by the end of the evening. Twas fun!

I’m having Best Bud and her SIL over this Saturday night for more of the same. There’s one last concert of the season on Saturday and I have been absolutely loving hosting a small group every Saturday night since Thanksgiving.

So much holiday spirit this year! I do love that.

We are doing Secret Santa at the office again this year, and I signed up. We are supposed to give small goodies from December 1 until the 17th when we have our Christmas lunch.

I don’t know much about my giftee because I think I have only interacted with her once in the breakroom. But I’ve now given her three packages of cute little gifts (you know, coffee mug, hot chocolate, treats, that kind of thing), wrapped nicely and sent with a note. Everyone else is getting cute little packages too - and they are sharing on social media and all kinds of excitement surrounding their Secret Santas.

I have gotten exactly ZERO from mine. Now I know that’s how this works. If the gifter wants to blow their wad on one single gift, that’s their prerogative, but I think Secret Santa works best when you get a bunch of little silly things and deliver them at random. Isn’t that the fun way to play the game?

And because I’ve heard zip and zilch from mine, of course I’m getting this stupid complex thinking maybe my Secret Santa doesn’t like me. Hahahah, right? What a silly thing to think! I can’t even believe I would think this way about a stupid GAME.

But that’s how the brain works. I need therapy.

Oh, that’s right. I’m IN therapy! Perhaps my Secret Santa has gotten the message that they don’t have to give me a bunch of silly little gifts - they are perfectly fine to do exactly what they want and wait until the last possible second. So be it. WHY am I even wasting time writing this down and letting this take space in my brain?

Let’s talk about something else.

I have a video date with a Bumble guy tonight! That’s right - we’re stepping back into time, to the beginning of the pandemic and doing a proper video chat. The reason we’re doing it this way is because the guy isn’t vaccinated. Now, normally that would be a total dealbreaker, but I’m curious about this guy. His lack of vaccination isn’t political, it’s for medical reasons and I want to hear more. He’s super cute in his pics. I’m looking forward to seeing him in real life/time. Do video chats count as dates? Should I do a RAD?

Meanwhile, Maria is working her matchmaking magic. Actually, her daughter is. They are trying to set me up with some colleague of Maria’s daughter’s husband. She messaged me some pics of him receiving awards and posing with her daughter’s husband and he looks like a really nice guy. Not super attractive, but not NOT attractive. After Google-ing, I see he is and incredibly accomplished trial attorney and man-about-town. Ugh. I could use some about-town in my life right now. I’m completely open to this one. She gave him my number yesterday and I haven’t heard anything back yet, but the dude sounds super duper busy, and I’m really not in a hurry.

But maybe I should be.

It is always going to come back around to cancer from here on out.

Over the last week, I’ve felt some awful pains in my liver area (my upper right abdomen), and of course I’ve Googled the shit out of it. It’s possible that my liver is inflamed - or maybe was inflamed. Over the last day and a half the pain has gone away. But in the back of my mind, I will always be thinking about “what if” or “could it be…”

Sucks to be here, but this is where I am.

Has anyone done the Prolon fasting-mimicking diet? I’m thinking about trying it next week. I’m hoping it will re-start/kickstart my body back into a refreshed state. I have just been feeling so bluh. I mean, not as BLUH as I was feeling during chemo by ANY means, but I feel like there’s chemo residue trapped in there that maybe I can flush out by trying this out. I’m looking forward to it. It’s only for 5 days and I think I can knock that out during the workweek…except! Ugh, the Christmas lunch! Hm. I think I can still do it.

Let me know if you’ve tried it!

OK. Gotta roll for now. I have to go push someone to get their work done, but I have to get mine done first!

Tell me how you’re doing!
Love,
GS