I have seriously messed up dreams. There have been a few to mention. One was that my ex was back in town and wanted to get back together with me. It was so weird and so real. I was so happy to be with him. Honestly, I will probably always feel like he was the one that got away. Anyway, last night's dream was about John.
We were at BP's where we used to work together, and he was there, obviously I was surprised because I knew that he had died so I was like John what the hell!? And he's like yeah they brought me back to life so I'm good. I was so happy! We were joking and laughing just like old times. But it was like I knew he was going to die soon. I started getting worried and kept asking him how he was doing and getting him water. He seemed like he was fine, and we were going to go sing some karaoke or something (our usually Wednesday night) and as he got up to go he fell over, and I knew that he was gone. I was sobbing trying to get him to wake up, knowing it was useless. It was devastating.
I keep thinking about how badly I want to talk to him just one last time. It seems so fucking surreal. I don't even know what to do. I am going home tomorrow, there's a big party that i want to go to. I want to go but at the same time I don't. I miss being around people I know. I feel very lonely, but at the same time I think I prefer to be alone.
Loading comments...