Return to Normal in Book Six: Trying to Hold On 2019

Yesterday was certainly interesting.

I did about a solid hour of work, then shoveled the back and front driveways… then played video games (getting a new achievement in an older game, w00t). Then I got a call from a judge. Worked another 10 minutes. Received word that the county would be closing down early, then took an awesome nap. I awoke at 4:30 and kind of realized… when I’m not in Court and away from my Ideal Office Set Up… there isn’t a whole lot of work to be done (some days). After that, Wife and I worked out where I burned over 700 calories… meaning that my entire day was easily over 1,000 calories burned. I weighed myself and saw that I’m hovering 225 again. I know it is expecting too much and is ridiculously unlikely to happen… but it would be nice to get to 220 this month. Ultimately, it would be nice to get to 200 by May but… I realize that is all but certainly impossible to do in a healthy, sustainable way.

This morning, the television was still on when I woke up. It was The Magicians and it is certainly a show I’m interested in. But it may be something I watch alone eventually because even though Wife wanted to see it… knowing that the Magic Show continues and SyFy cancelled her beloved The Expanse might put her off. I showered and started my drive. The drive? Bugger. It wasn’t terribly slippery but snow plus sun plus being tired never makes me feel safe on the drive. Maybe that’s why my mind reverted to a “Time Travel” perspective. I found my thoughts again drifting to the What Ifs of how things would be if I could artfully pull the strings of my past to create different outcomes. I’m not doing that as obsessively as I once did but I do find my mind wanders there on occasion.

Got into work and started my day. E-Mails? Only two, one confirming my filings and the other asking me for evidence to a case I’m not even working. Then off to attempt to respond to three entries worth of notes I’ve been meaning to get to. So my day should (arguably) appear as follows:

(1) E-Mail and Catch Up
(2) Prosebox Comment Response
(3) News Review
(4) Pretrial Conferences in Magistrate
(5) Lunch
(6) Thursday Trial Prep (and there are a LOT of trials to prep)
(7) Return phone call for woman who wanted Free Attorney Strategy Session
(8) Try (desperately) to catch up on Prosebox Bookmarks
(9) Check closing Shopko for Queen Bed Sets and Knee Brace for Wife
(10) Gym
(11) Medicated Bathtub Soak
(12) Dinner and Bed.
(Allegedly)

I frequent Quora but rarely get overly involved. A friend on Facebook shared this and, despite being American (3rd Generation from Bermuda) this, too, is how I tend to feel. (NOTE: Unlike what Trumpists claim, however, my problems with the President extend beyond his incompetence, cruelty, and lack of substance… I do take issue with the policies he continually claims work but then fall flat. That, tragically, is a key issue… Trump supporters often think that people don’t like him because of WHO he is and ignore THE GREAT WORK he has accomplished… the problem being that THE GREAT WORK is a smokescreen he keeps putting up himself and is rarely proven accurate in the Real World).

Someone on Quora asked “Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?” Nate White, an articulate and witty writer from England wrote this magnificent response.

A few things spring to mind.

Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem.

For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace - all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed.

So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump’s limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief.

Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing - not once, ever.

I don’t say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility - for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman.

But with Trump, it’s a fact. He doesn’t even seem to understand what a joke is - his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty.

Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers.

And scarily, he doesn’t just talk in crude, witless insults - he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness.

There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It’s all surface.

Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront.

Well, we don’t. We see it as having no inner world, no soul.

And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist.

Trump is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that.

He’s not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat.

He’s more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege.

And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully.

That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead.

There are unspoken rules to this stuff - the Queensberry rules of basic decency - and he breaks them all. He punches downwards - which a gentleman should, would, could never do - and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless - and he kicks them when they are down.

So the fact that a significant minority - perhaps a third - of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think ‘Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy’ is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that:
Americans are supposed to be nicer than us, and mostly are.
You don’t need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man.

This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss.

After all, it’s impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum.

God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid.

He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart.

In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws - he would make a Trump.

And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumpfuls of hair and scream in anguish:

‘My God… what… have… I… created?

If being a twat was a TV show, Trump would be the boxed set.

Item 1: BBC North America Journalist Jon Sopel “Why the attack on our cameraman was no surprise” I would recommend reading the article because it provides an excellent glimpse into the violence being fomented by Trump against the Media. The Orange Asshole has now begun claiming (as close to verbatim as my memory allows) that “The most dishonest people int he media are the fact checkers. They’re so fake.” Trump is declaring to a crowd that already believes “Trust Trump Over Everything” that the very people who must produce evidence are “dishonest” because they “disagree” with Trump. We have come to a world where The President of the United States is saying “Are you going to believe the things I’m making up on the spot; or people with evidence? Because I’m the only one you can trust!” It is disgusting. It is horrifying. And I honestly don’t see it stopping any time soon.

“I know we get things wrong, and should always be humble enough to put our hands up when we do. But our job is to hold power to account: prime ministers, presidents, kings and queens, despots and autocrats. But just because you don’t like the coverage doesn’t mean it’s fake.”

Item 2: BBC Asia Journalist Yvette Tan “Plastic pollution: One town smothered by 17,000 tonnes of rubbish” While Presidents and Prime Ministers (and a damned sight too many Republicans) argue about whether there is any point to being better stewards of the earth (and while a Conservative Friend of mine tried to tell me that Eco-Friendly policy is merely an attempt to destroy the American Economy)… we have plastic problems. And this isn’t just “Oh, save the poor ocean from plastic” even though we should, this is legitimately people being poisoned because the illegal recycling plants are burning plastic releasing those toxins into the air. I get it… the old, the wealthy, and the people that listen to them without question don’t care about this issue. The old will die before the world does and too many wealthy people honestly believe that their wealth will protect them from the worst of things to come. But… really? NOBODY in power thinks it is time to actively take steps to try to be better about natural resources, clean air, clean water?? I mean… shit was SUPER bad in the 1950s and 1960s and we fixed it. Before turning around and doubling down on making it worse again.

Item 3: US & Canada Report: “Trump says second government shutdown unlikely after deal reached” The headline is hopeful, but the first line is not. Trump’s exact words? “”I don’t think you’re going to see a shutdown. If you did have it, it’s the Democrats fault.” Riiiiiight. Because AGAIN a bi-partisan committee settled on a compromise that requires the President’s Signature. SO if the President chooses not to sign the bill… it is the Democrat’s fault. Because a spoiled maggot who throws a tantrum for not getting his way can’t be held responsible for throwing a tantrum.... the Nanny should have known what was going to happen and given the little urchin what he wanted if she really didn’t want the tantrum to happen.

Item 4: BBC Environment Corespondent Matt McGrath “Green New Deal : Can this plan pushed by some Democrats really work?” There are a few interesting things going on in American Politics surrounding this Green New Deal. First: Senate Majority Leader Turtle, who refused to call for a vote to end the shutdown immediately called for a vote on it. Why? Because this whole mess could be political suicide for the Democrats. IF a Democrat doesn’t vote for it, any Democrat challenger can say “This Senator doesn’t care about the environment!” If a Democrat DOES vote for it, any Republican challenger can say, “This Senator wants to destroy the economy and install socialism!!” Second: Because Republicans, even non-Trumpists, are already saying that about the Green New Deal. They are already claiming that it is ultimately a Trojan Horse intended to destroy the US Economy in an effort to force socialism. Conspiratorial much? AND AGAIN… as Republicans argue “Economic Impact” they continue to ignore “A Pressing Need to Respond to Climate Change.” I’m not so anarchic as to want any massive economic shifts… that would be bad. But screaming “The Economy!” and never saying “So how about this instead?” is juvenile and dangerous. We either get busy trying to solve these problems, or these problems will get WAY out of hand.

Item 1: Brief Russian Recap.... https://www.cnn.com/interactive/2019/politics/trump-team-russia-then-now/
What boils me SO much is that his Supporters have been just as wishy washy as he has. It went from “He doesn’t need to do this because nothing happened.” To “Even if something happened, this is just people mad at him and not that important.” To “This wouldn’t even be getting investigated if people didn’t hate him so much.” And I want to breath. Take a bit of a sigh. And then shout with Super Human Loudness
THE MAN BROKE THE LAW BEFORE RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT, WHILE RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT AND possibly AS PRESIDENT! For a political party that claims to be about “Limiting Government Power” allowing a Government Representative to quite literally be a law unto themselves seems like dangerous hypocritical bullshit. I can not stand nor can I forgive the people that demanded Hillary Clinton be imprisoned forever over the use of Private E-Mail Servers now saying “Working with a hostile foreign power in illegal ways isn’t even that big of a deal.” You’re all bad jokes that make a mockery of your very concept of ethics when you’re in that camp.

Item 2: The expected liberal backlash of a compromise: https://www.cnn.com/2019/02/12/opinions/border-wall-shutdown-deal-democrats-garca/index.html
I knew it was coming. I saw it on Facebook as soon as the deal had been announced. The Democrats went from offering 1.6 Billion Dollars for the Wall, Trump shut the government down, the Democrats offer 1.3 Billion Dollars for the Wall. Liberals scream that Democrats have sold out their principles. WHAT?! I get it. I really do. Everyone (including me) is against building the wall. But a few things to remember:
(1) Compromise is the root of political action. If both sides are “a little happy” and both sides are “a little disappointed” then you know it is a good compromise!
(2) Planting your flag and saying “NOTHING BUT WHAT I WANT” is actually what makes Trump such a bullshit human. DON’T respond to a bullshit human by trying to be equally bullshit. Nobody wins that way.
(3) People are claiming that the Democrats “gave too much away.” They offered less this time. If, in a negotiation, a party demands to re-negotiate… and the responding party successfully offers less than originally negotiated??? That’s considered a negotiation victory.
(4) The agreement hasn’t even been finalized yet. Trump may, I almost expect him to, refuse to sign the deal believing he can get Democrats to blink on Funding the Wall. In which case, it wouldn’t matter if the Democrats offered 0 money or 3 billion money… if Trump won’t accept anything less than his 5.whatever then it doesn’t matter in any way anyway.

Today’s Primary Frustration:
Bloody technological difficulties.

My court calendar, court filings, and everything I do for work is located in this nicely organized typically excellent computer program. However, all day… after perhaps 20 minutes of solid use, the damned thing stops responding. I have to CNTRL ALT DEL the task manager, shut it down, re-start the program and pick up where I left off. Every twenty minutes. A damned nuisance, I tell you that much!

But how’s this for a Magistrate week!?

Today, I was to have 11 hearings. Of those… 7 requested continuances; 1 requested a Trial Date (because she believes the assault was justified)… leaving 3 hearings total for today. From 11 to 3… I’ll just chalk it up as Karmic Apology for tomorrow. Tomorrow’s Magistrate schedule looks, to put it mildly, rough as fuck. 12 TRIALS. Not just hearings. Full, fucking TRIALS. That is insane. Truly.

And that is what I must now prepare for. EXCEPT the State is in closing arguments for our A Felony Case and I really want to hear those… so I’ll do that. Then come back here and prep for Trials. And return phone calls. And try to catch up on Prosebox Bookmarks. I think I can make all of that work!

The following cartoon was drawn for the Nixon Era and (as with too much of Nixon Era items) is incredibly relevant today. My concern is that the Republican Party of the 1970s was far more willing to say “The Constitution” than the current Republican Party.

Now, again, I want to declare that I think many of AOC’s ideas would be so costly to the American Tax Payer as to be destructive. So, I don’t support her economic agenda. But she says things like the following and I think, “You have to respect her outrage at how broken the system is.” But she is an excellent lightning rod for how even discussing how broken the system is is broken. Because even friends of mine on the Republican side that say “The system is massively fucking broken” say “Nothing AOC says or does should be respected or considered. She’s an unintelligent homonculi who swept people up into Hot Woman Twitter Frenzy and has no substance.” Yeah, conservatives seem to desperately fucking HATE HER.... but then… again… these points are salient.

And yet… honestly… what my Conservative Friends seem to ignore… in cases like Steve King speaking or Donald Trump speaking or Fox News speaking or Mitch McConnel speaking or Wilbur Ross speaking or Ann Coulter speaking or (on and on)

https://www.facebook.com/bbccomedy/videos/1636896346419527/

All of that being said, I can assure you that (despite all of my better instincts and personal desires) tomorrow’s “Valentine’s Day” will hold no meaning or significance. I shall text my parents a very happy anniversary, I shall attempt to kiss my wife; but as she rejects all forms of romance… and as my day will already be stressful and busy as all hell; the day will pass by as though it had no significance at all. And that does make me a bit sad. I appreciate that a number of people thoroughly despise Valentine’s Day but… I was raised in a different environment. Hell, I am the child of High School Sweethearts that wed on Valentine’s Day and whom, despite my father being rather stereotypical in many ways, always went WAY above and beyond to show his love and appreciation for my mother on Valentine’s Day. So… yeah. It would be nice to be able to do something special… or (because it would be far less expected) have Wife do something special for me… but I know it won’t happen. There are certain things that I am trying to become okay about because they are, in essence, DETAILS and not THE MAIN THING. I’m trying to become okay that Wife will never select an outfit for me. She will never ask herself “What would Chris like to see me in?” I’m trying to become okay that Wife will never rev up the passion. She will never look over to me and say, “I want you. Take me.” I’m trying to become okay that Wife will never physically initiate anything of a sexual nature. She will never nibble my neck, my earlobe, put her hands down my pants, go down on me… there will be no “explicit foreplay.” I’m trying to become okay that Wife will never see any value in romance or romantic gestures. She will never see some grand move or even some tender romantic present as having value. I am trying to become okay about these things. They are, in essence, DETAILS and not THE MAIN THING.

It is highly unlikely that I’ll have the time or ability to do this but I have a hankering to write in my Explicit Content Book again. Something discussing Aoife and Raven as, after discussing the situations specifically, I see similarities and important things I’d like to discuss and elaborate upon. We’ll see if I do that, though. As I’ve said previously… this is somewhat a busy week for the next few days.