I don’t know in Finding Me

I wish I felt like I did last night. Motivated, inspired, OKAY. I’m always so vulnerable after my therapy appointments. We talked a lot about suicide and childhood. I left feeling very self destructive.

It always takes me so long to open up. I wish I could walk in there and say everything I want to. Everything I rehearsed. I have so many conversations with myself, trying to make it easier for me to talk to him. But the second I get in there my anxiety blocks everything.

I’m feeling very low tonight. Can’t really say much more.